Interlude

[Brahma]

Interlude

Sometimes
when I am ill at ease,
or just too frantic-minded to attend the needs
of everyday existence,
I set out through a valley
where vineyards lie like verdant topping
on the sun-baked earth;
and turning off a highway
hard-pressed by endless cavalcades
of horseless carriages,
climb up through melon pastures
to a church I know.

And there,
amidst a weathered inventory of ghosts
that long ago were settlers in those parts,
I sit beside that humble monument
to their life’s aspirations
and dream of unsophisticated things.
Or watch a flock of silver birds
manoeuvre in the sun.
Or simply listen
to the silence.

[MorpheusSandman]

While I don't like it quite as well as your formal poetry, I still think this is a minor pastoral gem of a piece that eloquently expresses that desire to get away from the stuffed business of our lives to something more peacefully tranquil. I mean, today was the first nice (weather) day we'd had here in a while, so I actually went outside and spent the day reading, and the peacefulness of it compared to my usual life really did strike me, and I think this captures a piece of that feeling.

As for the free verse, I like how you subtly modulate the lines and stresses. That's been the bane of my exercises in free verse and I'm still never quite sure where and why to do it, but I think you and I have similar (intuitive?) sensibilities of varying the rising and falling of the stresses in juxtaposed lines, usually preferring to end on a diminuendo.

[Brahma]

Hello, Morpheus.

Let me say, firstly, that I have much more trouble with this form than with the more formal verse. I worry, sometimes, that it might simply end up as (shall we say) 'atmospheric prose' rather than poetry. Perhaps only practice (and still more practice!) together with further reading of established poets, will help me on this score.

As to occasionally 'getting away from it all', I still have a sufficient number of calls upon my time to warrant the occasional visit to the locale of the church in this piece.

I think it ironic that there's not a harsh word to be read in a cemetery. Perhaps we should all visit them more often?

Regards,

Brahma.

[Jerrybaldy]

I enjoyed the opening lines but it seemed to become 'worthy' thereafter.