Log in

View Full Version : In Your Hand I Hold the World



Dark Muse
03-31-2011, 08:21 PM
In Your Hand I Hold the World

I was a dweller
in the darkness,
entombed in self-
imposed exile
from the world
of shadows.

And I watched
paintings dance
on the wall
within the firelight.

When you appeared
as an apparition
silhouetted against
the night.

Your arm extended
reaching across
the void and as
our fingers touched,
first contact made
it was a shockwave.

My body jolted
as if alive
for the first time
in the knowledge
of the warmth
of your skin.

And my hand
held firm in yours
while you lifted
me up.

Thus we walked
together, linked
hand in hand
into the world
of new discovery.

MorpheusSandman
03-31-2011, 09:35 PM
I like the images and words, but I'm less sure about the form. Why the short lines? It strikes me that this poem would be better served if the lines could breathe a bit more...

deryk
03-31-2011, 11:18 PM
It certainly has an urgency and a claustrophobia.

MystyrMystyry
04-05-2011, 06:38 AM
I like the dream imagery and the idea of an unrevealed transdimensional (ghost?) love reaching out and inspiring new hope

Good stuff Dark Muse!

Dark Muse
04-05-2011, 11:35 AM
Thank you!

Bar22do
04-05-2011, 01:34 PM
Mysterious, haunting, as if catching a "possession"... but great to read even if one holds one's breath... Thanks from Bar

Delta40
04-05-2011, 05:11 PM
I like the theme of somehow being saved by another.