She Kissed Me

[kittypaws]

Just a slight touch
A tease, a wink and air kiss.
Oh so warm;
A Taunt of things to be.

Jack arrived back
And the earlier party left.
He brought his own company
Of rumbling freight trains
And creaking sounds from their thunder.

He nipped my nose
And made my eyes tear.
And MY tease
Wearing her velvet gloves ~
Well she left me wanting more.

Amanda Curtis 2/14/11

[everyadventure]

Maybe I was thrown off by the avatar, but I was envisioning a cat?

[hillwalker]

I thought perhaps Jack was a child playing with his toys (rumbling freight trains/
And creaking sounds from their thunder.) who then gave the writer a clumsy, child-like kiss.

Line 6 was a prosaic distraction that added nothing to what is otherwise a very enigmatic piece of poetry. Some lyricism and subtlety that perhaps does not require us to really fathom out who the main characters are.

H

[Delta40]

He nipped my nose has an animal feel to it. I'm a bit confused. I thought of affairs, children and animals!

[kittypaws]

I reckon I was a bit vague....this poem is of the seasons of winter and when spring steps in but only for a dance and then disappears and Jack Frost and his strong winds return.

I will firm it up within the next couple of days ~ so be on the lookout for it!

Do you ever have too much you are trying to do and never enuf time to do it in?

I need a rich, health man and loving would be a bonus! So I could spend more time focusing on my writing.

I AM a Writer...

I'll be back with the "extended version".

thank you everyadventure, H and dear Delta.

"When one of my writes is way off beat...it is appreciated when friends try to help me straighten it back up."

Kittypaws

:willy_nilly: