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View Full Version : Roller Coaster



MystyrMystyry
02-05-2011, 11:02 PM
Still under construction


Roller Coaster


slowly
it
starts
chugging
chugging
through
the
guidelines

good

A
Sudden
Tug
Of
Panic
As
The
Carriage
Catches!

..............................................Top. .................................................. .............................
...................................Very........... ...Catch.......................................... ..........................
............................The................... ...........Your................................... ...........................
.......................To......................... .................Breath........................... ...........................
..................Go.............................. .....................It's......................... .............................
............We.................................... ......................Gaining..................... ..........................
.......Up......................................... .........................Mom...................... ...........................
.And.............................................. ...........................Ent.................... ............................
.................................................. ................................Um................ ............................
.................................................. ..................................Down............ ............................
.................................................. .................................Into............. .............................
.................................................. ................................The............... ..........................
.................................................. ................................Sub............... .............................
.................................................. ..............................Ter................. ..............................
.................................................. ...........................Ran.................... .............................
.................................................. .......................Ean........................ .............................
.................................................. .................Bunker........................... ............................
.................................................. ..........Where................................... ............................
.................................................. ..Pirates......................................... .............................
............................................Stash. .................................................. ............................
..................................Treasure........ .................................................. ...........................
........................And....................... .................................................. .............................
..................Black........................... .................................................. .............................
..............Light............................... .................................................. ..............................
..................Monsters........................ .................................................. ...........................
.......................Jump....................... .................................A Dragon.................................
..........................Through................. ..................There's............Breathing.... .....................
..................................The............. ..............And.........................Fire.... .........................
........................................Holes..... ...Walls.................................At....... ..........................
...............................................In. The.....................................Us........ ...........................
.................................................. ......................................As.......... ...................See..
.................................................. ....................................We............ ..............Can..The
.................................................. .............................Wind................. ..........We......Ferris
.................................................. ......................Past........................ .......Where....Wheel.
.................................................. ...............Its................................ .......From......And......
.................................................. .......Lair....................................... ......Ride.......The.......
.............................................And.. .................................................. ...We.........Castle.....
..................................Visions......... .................................................. ...Up........And.......
..........................Of...................... .................................................. ...Up........The...........
...................Demons......................... .................................................U p.........Min..........
.........................Flash.................... .................................................. .Peak......I...............
..............................On.................. .................................................. .Highest..Ature.........
......................................The......... .................................................. The........Train.........
..............................................Wall s................................................O f...........An.............
.................................................. .......And......................................To p..........Y..............
.................................................. ..Now.........................................The. ..........Thing........
.........................................There's.. .............................................At... ............To............
.....................................A............ ...............................................Nea rly.........Take.........
............................Spec.................. ............................................But... .............Minds......
......................Tac......................... ...........................................Slow... ..............Off.........
.................Ular............................. ...........................................Slow... ................The.......
.................................................. ...........................................Slow... ....................Rid.....
............Electric.............................. .....................................,,.Surface... ..................Ic
..............Storm............................... .....................................The.......... ..................U
.................................................. .....................................To........... ....................Lous
................Of................................ ................................Ascent............ ................Steep..
......................Brilliant................... ..........................Our..................... ................Ness.....
.............................Colour............... ....................Begin......................... ............And
......................................To.......... ..................We.............................. .........Speed
...............................................Far ewell.....As...................................... .......But
.................................................. ..........Us...................................... .....Finally......
.................................................. .................................................. .There's......
.................................................. .................................................A n
........Spidery................................... ..........................................End..... ...........
....Things.....Feel............................... ....................................In............ .......
....On................I can............................................... .......Sight.........
....My........................It.................. ..........................Or......
....Face.........................Through.......... ..................Is...........
....Damn!...............................Going..... ...............It................
....I.........................................We'r e..............A....................
....Didn't.................................. ....And......Dark............................
....Expect........................................ ...Tunnel......................................... .....
....Such.......................................... .................................................. ................
....A............................................. .................................................W rong..................
....Sudden........................................ .................................................. .........As.........
....Drop.......................................... ......................................Be.......... ..................
....But........................................... .................................................. ..................A....
....It's.......................................... .................................Could............ ..........
........Okay...................................... ...........................I...................... ...............Sharp
...............There's............................ ......................Or.......................... ..........Swerve..
.............................The.................. ................End............................... .......Takes
.....................................Light........ ....The........................................... .....Us....
................................................At .................................................. .....Through.......
.................................................. .................................................. ....A.......
.................................................. .................................................. .Gleaming..
.................................................. ..............................................Spac eship............
.................................................. ...........................................Full... ....................
.................................................. .....................................Of........... ................
.................................................. ......................Blinking.................... ............
.................................................. ...........Lights................................. ............
.................................................. ......And......................................... ...................
.................................................S trange............................................ ..................
...........................................Aliens. .................................................. ....................
........................................With...... .................................................. ......
............................................Antenn as................................................ ...................
.................................................. ..And............................................. ......................
.................................................. .........Big...................................... ......................
.................................................. ...............Red................................ ...................
.................................................. ......................Eyes........................ .............
.................................................. .............................Waving...............
.................................................. .....................................Wildly....
.................................................. .............................................For.. ..........
.................................................. ...............................................Int ruding..........
.................................................. ..............................................But. ...............
.................................................. ...........................................Not.... ...........
.................................................. ...............................To................. ...Su-u-u-dden
.................................................. .................Worry.................Thi-i-i-i-i-is...........Acc.
.................................................. .....We.............................At............ .............Elar
..............................................Won' t..............................Not................ ..........Ation....
.........................................Be....... ..........................Least................... .......And......
...............................Hanging............ .............At................................... Quick....
.................................................. ..Around........................................If .........
..........void.................................... ...........................................Jolty.. .......
......................the......................... ......................................Spin........ ...
...............................Into............... ..................................About.........
..........inky.......................RATE......... ............................We..........
..............................................ING. .............................Find................. ..........
................................................EN .........................Our...................... .............
..........black.................................FR IGHT..............Selves.......................... ...
.................................................. ......A.............Aiming.........
.................................................. .......At...........At............................
..........space................................... ....Out............A..................
.................................................. ........Thrust........Large...
.................................................. ..............Are..........Port.............
..........floating..................And Orange.............We...........Hole.........
....................................Purple.....Whe n.............And...........But..........
.................................And.............. .A..................Hole.........It............... ...........
..........amid................Green..............Q uick...........Worm........Could.................. .
...........The............. ..Of..................Drop.............A.......... ..........Be
.............Glinting.............Balls........... ..Takes............Or..............A...
...............Stars..................Plasma...... ....Us..............Blackhole.................
.................Sucked..............With......... ....Down.............................
.....................Toward......Glowing.......... ...To..............................A Pool Of.............
.............................A Vortex........................A................... .....In.............Cold............
.................................................. ................Final..........Landing............ ...Water.....
.................................................. ......................SPLASSHH!!!................. .......
.................................................. .................................................. ..............
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hillwalker
02-06-2011, 10:16 AM
Original - but nausea inducing

H

everyadventure
02-06-2011, 11:55 AM
I hate rollercoasters! But enjoyed yours :) I took a glance at this when the title showed up on the forum last night: "Rollercoaster" and then all it said was "Coming Soon." I laughed out loud, thinking that was your poem ;)

I must say I am impressed by your skill and patience, as it is next to impossible to properly shape a poem on this primitive forum!

MystyrMystyry
02-07-2011, 06:14 PM
And do you know every, I very bleedin' nearly left it at 'coming soon' ? - trouble is with every line the more difficult it became, and the more determined I was to do it, until my head exploded into a million little dotty fragments springing out in all directions

It was like running a mental marathon the whole way from first dot to last and I put that one in so much later than the first (look at the edit time vs the original posting - this should if anything win the award for most edits in a single post ever

Thanks both of you for commenting without criticising, and overlooking the fact it is in fact not a very good poem, and taking the time to wind your way through the words - words that I won't be able to read for at least another month

MM

Alexander III
02-08-2011, 04:48 PM
hehe good stuff, Apollinaire's style is always amusing

Delta40
02-08-2011, 04:54 PM
That was one hell of a ride Mystyr! Nauseating and very effective. Don't tell me how much time the construction of it took

MystyrMystyry
02-08-2011, 05:19 PM
In part inspired by your damnable Snake poem Delta - I just had to prove it could be done - and I did it with dashes, and I did it with pluses, I did it with dropstrokes, but in the end I did it with dots

Delta40
02-08-2011, 05:42 PM
Kudos to you for your great feat!

blank|verse
02-09-2011, 05:45 PM
Yes, it's brilliantly achieved, if not the greatest poem ever written! It reminds me of the tale of the cat and the mouse (http://bootless.net/mouse.html)from Alice in Wonderland. Good fun.