Has it occurred to anyone else...

[kiki1982]

... that people do not know the difference between discussing and arguing?

Since I have been on this forum, I have started to take it for granted that people, despite having different opinions, have the ability to discuss a point without resulting into offense. My father could do that too.

Still, I look on other forums on any subject and whenever I try to put together a serious discussing, people usually result in 'how do you dare to question m opinion', start insulting one another because their opinions are different (judgment) or they just plainly start to use arument that do not have anything to do with the discussion. I am not trying to put them down or anything, but surely your opinion is not the only right one in the world?

My hubby also resents discussing something and thinks I want to argue. I have explained to him countless times that it is not because one wants to discuss, one should result in throwing mud, but he doesn't seem to know the difference.

Anyone else who is now a bit 'spoilt'? :D

[MystyrMystyry]

Hi Kiki,

Discussing something is a way of communicating, but arguing is way of having fun and learning something at the same time

It's not the only way of having fun, but it's been around since - well I don't know exactly, but the Ancient Greeks at least

But as a means of testing your opinion and beliefs a healthy debate can't really be beat

When someone resorts to swearing and insults it means the debate has been won, and it's great to see them lose without realising they've lost

Men like a good argument, and we seem to always be looking for one, it's a way of challenging our mental celerity - but the reason for our alacrity is usually because someone has said something that challenges what we believe to be true

If you tie up your beliefs with your sense of self and are then challenged it can be seen as a personal affront

True debating is most seen in politics - and they're forever waving pieces of foolscap in the air to demonstrate they've done they're homework - where the winning or losing has actual consequences

[Emil Miller]

I think most people bring their preconceptions or misconceptions to forums of which they are members and, obviously, it is better not to personalize comments except, perhaps, in fun. I try to refrain from doing so unless someone tries to do it to me, at which point I will in all probability bite back.
Fortunately, we have a reasonably robust monitoring of Litnet that prevents things from getting out of hand. This is why discussion on these boards remains fairly civilised and informative.

[MANICHAEAN]

Until Brian, someone informs us that Shakespeare was Italian!
Then its holy war.

[Emil Miller]

Until Brian, someone informs us that Shakespeare was Italian!
Then its holy war.

Actually we did have someone claiming that and the thread was closed down just after it deteriorated into a slanging match. Nevertheless, I don't think the origin of Shakespeare or the plays is going to go away, because it is very pertinent to Litnet and also very interesting.

[Lokasenna]

An argument? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kQFKtI6gn9Y)

Sorry, I couldn't resist..!

The basis behind a constructive argument or discussion is mutual respect - if that isn't there, then the whole thing is ultimately pointless. The basic principle of an argument is that while the two positions may be in opposition, they are (at least at the beginning) equally valid.

As soon as someone resorts to abuse (instead of relying on their evidence), then they have in essence lost. It is perhaps a flaw in my personality that I when I recieve abuse, I tend to rise up to it.

Still, such things are rare here on LitNet (and indeed in life), and the quality of debate is usually high and informative.

[LitNetIsGreat]

Anyone else who is now a bit 'spoilt'?

I know what you mean, but I don't go on any other forums except the River Cottage one and I don't often go on that.

Personally, I can't be doing with all the hassle with Facebook or the annoying Twitter thing and You tube is a big no, no; it seems that half of the people writing comments on there are morons with psychological issues and appalling spelling. I also waste enough time of Lit net as it is without adding to it. (I'm not saying that Lit net is a waste of time, far from it, but you can get drawn into nonsense from time to time or go into enormous detail about your eating habits etc, etc.)

I like debating for sure - arguing my point, but there is a definite and obvious line between doing so constructively and being moronic which is kept on here about 99% of the time or so.

[Paulclem]

One thing I've gained from the discussions on Litnet is a better ability to do it. I've also discovered my limitations - such as scientific knowledge, which is neither up to date nor wholly reliable as I tended to draw it from memory - (always fatal from someone who often forgets names...)

Anyway there is such a thin line between discussion and argument that it is very easy to degenerate from one to the other.

If you were that way inclined Neely, you could gain great pleasure from constantly correcting spelling and grammar on inferior forums. What a windup it would be, though there's always the possibility that some taunted maniac could hunt you through the forums and bombard you with text-speak. :biggrin5:

[OrphanPip]

Sometimes it's a lot funner to sling mud though.

[LitNetIsGreat]

If you were that way inclined Neely, you could gain great pleasure from constantly correcting spelling and grammar on inferior forums. What a windup it would be, though there's always the possibility that some taunted maniac could hunt you through the forums and bombard you with text-speak. :biggrin5:

Oh, no thanks. Yes they'd bombard you with f-ing and blinding and text speak. Actually you sometimes notice people doing that; pointing out spelling errors as part of their petty arguments, but then you think what the hell am I doing reading these Jeremy Kyles when I only wanted to listen to a song or to learn how to fillet a Mackerel?

[Paulclem]

Oh, no thanks. Yes they'd bombard you with f-ing and blinding and text speak. Actually you sometimes notice people doing that; pointing out spelling errors as part of their petty arguments, but then you think what the hell am I doing reading these Jeremy Kyles when I only wanted to listen to a song or to learn how to fillet a Mackerel?


:smilielol5:

Yes - I gather it's quite - sorry - relatively civilised here.