Housewife's Catechism

[everyadventure]

6 PM
He enters
loosening His tie
removing His shoes
it’s coming

hello dear,
(kiss)
what did you do today?

there it is.
damn Him
for this daily
litany
of things i have not done
places i have not been
people i have not spoken to

He smiles benignly
benevolently
as i dutifully recite
the catechism of the
cloistered housewife.

carpool
preschool
groceries
nursing
dusting
changing
cooking
mopping
laundry

i speak on,
but my words do not accumulate
they add up to
nothing

that’s nice, dear,
He says by way of absolution
and tells me
of His day
as i entertain
blasphemous
thoughts

[hillwalker]

Kitchen sink confessional - I love the sense of hopeless acceptance behind this despite the intentional humour.
The 5th stanza works particularly well as a mantra of domesticated hell.

H

[everyadventure]

Humour? Who's joking? ;)

[hillwalker]

:shocked:My mistake - I guess you've had a difficult week..... :)

H

[Jerrybaldy]

That is written in a way I love to read. Welcome, I look forward to reading more. I wouldnt want to be your poem's subject but I loved being it's reader. If it wasnt such a cliche I would say it was a breath of fresh air, but, as it is a cliche I am not going to say that. No way. Not on my watch.
JerryB

[Delta40]

I really enjoyed this poem and the pent up emotion of her washed away by his deafness is very loud indeed.

[aliengirl]

Though I like the whole poem the last three lines are GREAT. It reminded me of the times I have entertained those 'blasphemous' thoughts.

P.S. I don't have a husband yet but there are some other 'caring' people in my life.

[blank|verse]

I preferred 'Marbles'!

I think Jerry has this one about right - it is stereotypical and I don't think we get anything new on the situation, which seems quite traditional and dated. Not to say it doesn't still happen, of course, it's just we're not given a modern take on things.

It's also very one-sided - there is no thought for poor hubby going out to work to earn the money to pay for the kids and the groceries and the house in which all this happens.

And there's not much poetry going on.

Still, 'Marbles' was good! :)

[Haunted]

I like the satire in making the husband God like with the capital H and contrasting it with the subservient stay-at-home wife.

[Jerrybaldy]

Oh lord, please don't let me be misunderstood ! I was joking that my response was a cliche, not the poem, which I thought was great :)

[YesNo]

hello dear,
(kiss)
what did you do today?


Hmm, perhaps he shouldn't bother asking you about your day.

[drago]

I adored this poem. I especially appreciated that it addressed, but was not limited to, housewives. For example, I am still in a rather small time highschool while my significant other is in a substantially larger location, pursuing university courses that are far much more interesting than my own. No sense to babble. What I mean to say was I found this poem refreshingly relateable.



that’s nice, dear,
He says by way of absolution
and tells me
of His day
as i entertain
blasphemous
thoughts
I love it.




It's also very one-sided -
Ah! Do point out to me a self perceptive poem that is two-sided! (:

[paperleaves]

This is awesome!!