1975

[Jerrybaldy]

The beach emptied of windbreaks,
towels, buckets and spades
and other families
gone with the end of the day.
This bit of coast
belonged to you and me, sis
and mum and dad
holding hands in the sea.
I could smell candy floss
in the air
mixed with discarded
salty chips.
The swing boats on the beach,
had finished swinging today.
A name in the sand
was smoothly wiped.
With buried feet
we laid on a dune,
swept in an orange light
and watched,
never knowing
that this,
was the last
perfect day.

[Delta40]

Oh Jerry this is heart-wrenching. 1975 was the last good year of my childhood. I love the sound and flavours of this piece

belonged to you and me, sis
and mum and dad
holding hands in the sea.

You capture the whole notion of family security in these few lines

I could smell candy floss
in the air
mixed with discarded
salty chips.

great tangle of sweet and savoury.

[hillwalker]

Certainly one to twang the heart strings.... those never-forgotten summer holidays of childhood. And the concluding line like some unseen shark beneath the waves....

Da-da-da-da! Da-da-da-da! (the theme from 'Jaws' in case you missed the reference - which, coincidentally was released in '75).

H

[Jerrybaldy]

Thanks Delta, glad it resonated with you.
Hill, oddly enough, my father's replacement took me to see that film the following year.

[hillwalker]

Now that's spooky.

[Delta40]

ouch. As soon as we 10 pound poms got to Australia, my father bought a holden kingswood and took us to see it at the drive in on Saturday night and took us to the beach on Sunday...

[Jerrybaldy]

Yikes. I'm out of here :auto:

[Delta40]

Perhaps we need 'Jaws Anonymous?'

[Haunted]

A little tear for little Jerry...

[PrinceMyshkin]

That ending is a killer!

But, please: "we laid on a dune" should be we lay on a dune

[Big Dante]

That was very good.
The ending was the standout for me and it capped off a very well writen poem.
Well done.

[nightshifft]

never knowing
that this,
was the last
perfect day.


we never know when its the last perfect day do we even when we think we do
such truth sighhhhhh well done

dark

well done

[Maryd.]

Oh, how terribly sad, Jerry. My ♥ goes out to you.
xo

[MystyrMystyry]

You certainly got me with that one too

The self-contained nature setting and family unit forming two loose but powerful structures, the strength of them both contrasting with each other and themselves for what night and tomorrow shall bring, like everything that seems so real will soon be washed away

And, yeah...

[yuka]

so vivid, plucking lightly at anybody's heart. love

[firefangled]

Definitely a heartbreaker. Poetically speaking, kudos to you for the control, use of language and timing as well, all of which elevate an already poignant moment.

My favorite lines:

I could smell candy floss
in the air
mixed with discarded
salty chips.