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Biggus
12-06-2010, 07:48 AM
CHRISTMAS DAY IN THE WORKHOUSE # 3

It’s Christmas day in the workhouse
Just another grey day to endure
We have been promised nouvelle cuisine
So Oliver will be asking for more

CHRISTMAS GOOSE

At Christmas time
I do like a goose
It is my one weakness
And I offer no excuse

Though it does depend
Of course on the bird
To say any different
Would be quite absurd

The quality of goose
That you are executing
Is directly related
To the bird you are goosing

CHRISTMAS DAY IN THE WORKHOUSE # 4

It’s Christmas day in the workhouse
Just another grey day to endure
We are being treated to pot noodle
So Oliver won’t be asking for more

TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS # 8

Twas the night before Christmas and all thru the abode
Came the rancid smell like an un-emptied commode
It made your eyes water to be perfectly crude
Wow this baby needs to start eating solid food

CAROLS BY CANDLE LIGHT

Christmas is a time
Of many traditions
Like carol singing
With candle lit processions

But not anymore
A years old tradition
Has to had to go
For fear of litigation

“Health and safety”
So gets on my wick
As this year we had
Carols by glow stick

LAST CHRISTMAS

Last Christmas
We got the winter vomiting virus
It wasn’t nice
And it was shared by all of us
It was the worst
We didn’t see much Christmas cheer
I tell you one thing
We’ve just asked for money this year

GIFTS FOR EVERYONE

Jimmy got an iPod
Sally got an iPhone
Dad got an iPad
Mum got an iRon
Happy Christmas? iThink not

neilgee
12-06-2010, 02:37 PM
"Last Christmas" gave me a good belly laugh!!

Haunted
12-06-2010, 03:50 PM
LAST CHRISTMAS and GIFTS FOR EVERYONE cracked me up!

Biggus
12-06-2010, 07:06 PM
Thank you both I'm glad you enjoyed them

Paul

heronmer
12-07-2010, 02:28 AM
thank you for the links

yuka
12-07-2010, 03:37 AM
hoho.hero, very funny indeed. made me laugh laugh and laugh....
thank your for your funny poems.

Biggus
12-07-2010, 08:53 AM
Thank you