Unnoticed

[Fegger]

Evolution complete:
I am faceless.
That, once recognizable,
Is disfigured and ugly;
And exudes the smell
Of gangrenous life.
Eyes of strangers, friends,
Horrified by my transformation,
Look beyond, toward safety.
My stare will consume them,
And labor them,
Into my hollow.
It is my soul,
Pure and discontent,
That cries for emancipation
And deliverance.
It is the cyclones
Of failures echoing,
Again and again,
Abrading my use,
Paring my value.
The dust in my palms,
Is the former me;
And even the breaths
Of God
Cannot reconstitute
This undead.
I resign,
To the solitary
Choice
That remains:
To free the soul
From its heinous captor;
To bait tranquility
With selfless mercy
Until the final drop
Dries unnoticed.




Copyright 2010, Fegger

[Delta40]

Noticeable poem Fegger. I don't know how the use of me in this poem can effectively convey unnoticed but either way, you have written some eloquent lines - particularly



It is the cyclones
Of failures echoing,
Again and again,
Abrading my use,
Paring my value.

[Fegger]

Hey Delta--it's a suicide note, of sorts. Very centralized, hence the 'me', 'my' and 'I'...as is suicide...there is nor regard for others.

Cheers, mate!

[Delta40]

sorry. I have a condition called happyitis atm which blinds me to the despair woven into dark poetry. My fault, not yours!

[Fegger]

Haaaaaaaa........sweet....love it!

BTW, thanks for identifying that particular passage--it had received a fair amount of attention, prior...seems I did okay on that part!

[Delta40]

you have and if I was in a dark place right now, this is where I would take shelter to nurse it all....

[Haunted]

I saw this is a piece about social and cultural decadence and the suicide you mentioned is a symbolic one, yes?

[Fegger]

Haunted-While the opening lines might suggest or present such a metaphor, this was not my intention; but I'm flattered that this one could morph into that realm by virtue of a keen eye.

This character actually sees his 'life' as dead and the only 'righteous' deed that remains is to separate the body from the soul; and this is achieved by mortal death. In some ways, I think, he means to appease God in his decision---or make it right with Him, somehow.