kittypaws
11-18-2010, 10:01 PM
In everyone’s life there are things that they have done or had to do that are regrettable. Skeletons that are suppressed. I am no different and have many skeletons that tend to keep each other company, repenting for their sins.
I wish I could say under cover is about lustful sex, groping and tasting every inch of someone while engaging in enjoyable activities under the sheets; sadly not in this tale.
I had a debt to pay. This one came from my aspiration to please; please and win back someone who meant the world to me….it was a stupid, stupid, stupid idea. However, at that point in time it seemed worth pursuing and it landed me in very serious trouble and my goal was never accomplished. You have to remember, Big Brother is always watching and if you are involved enough in illegal activities HE will know where to find you.
I found myself working undercover for the DEA. Nothing to snicker at as there were many dangerous moments. I was not an officer, just a piece of “blonde bait” which when said, even to this day, makes me want to take an acid bath to cleanse myself as this resolution caused me much agony and self disrespect.
I was first assigned to DC Jones of the DEA who was a real ***. He had red hair, was short and always very cynical towards me. He even made me give up my gun, which left me with no protection other then Ron and Dave, the two undercover agents that I was to work with. Ron was a very good looking man (good dancer too!) and Dave, HA ~ I barely remember him. They were both my age and fit well into the scenes that would unfold in my life.
We would travel out to bars and pool halls, sometimes we even went to very elaborate parties; something your imagination would have a difficult time dreaming up, trust me, even I was surprised and very little caught me off guard. I was the pawn in the game, disgusting I know. I would approach the one selling the drugs, flirt and flatter; it never took much…. and get them to either share with me or sell me some of their goods. I wore a mike which was concealed in a button on my blouse. There was even a few times, especially at the bars, I would step outside with the supplier and just as the transaction went down Ron and Dave would appear with badges flashing and guns drawn and yes, they do say, “Freeze! You are under arrest!” I hated what I was doing, but it would save my *** in the long run.
After a number of these bust, the threats started to roll in. Death threats, mostly from girlfriends of those sent to prison. I almost at some point wish they had enough guts to carry them out as I felt that was what I deserved.
There were a couple of threats that brought the DEA to my front door and rushed me off to safety….very real and scary. I was told I could return home after a few days of living in hotels and moving daily, that the threat was “removed”. And unfortunately, I knew what that means from first hand experience. The DEA made sure to keep me safe as I had much to share that would prove lethal to some of the biggest drug lords at that time.
The District Attorney assigned me an attorney who couldn’t care two ****s about me. I was doomed and looking at spending the rest of my life in prison. I have always been ‘street smart’ and learned at a young age about common sense and how to handle people. It’s a gift….which I have noticed not many people have ever grasped. I never try to harm anyone; just move them around or myself around so everything works out. I did not want to spend my life in prison so I managed to get on the good side of the DA. Her name was Glyda Gordon or GG. She liked me and took me under her guidance. Ever day for months I had to go to the DEA/FBI building for hearings and testimonials, and every morning I woke with stomach cramps and nausea from what I was living. I even testified in front of the Supreme Court! Damn! How stupid had I been! Nothing gained but everything lost.
Well, GG helped me through a hell of a mess….even though she (The DA) was prosecuting me; she stood beside me and told me what and how to say and testify against the drug lords. She promised me protection if needed and was a friend to a degree. I reckon in all honesty, she was just trying to get “her man.” The trial came and lasted for six days with police offices guarding me and many defendants and their attorneys filing in and out of the court room. I was on the stand for three days…..three excruciating days. I always kept my composure and answered every thing with truth.
As I look back, someone ~ and I know who ~ turned me in for the same reason, and you know what? I understand why….talk about learning how life works and understand people and why they do what they do. Great insight as I tend to now look beyond the oblivious, as I find that a face is just a plain face and it is only looking into and being involved in a person you know them.
I am not a ‘bad’ person, I just stumbled and fell deep… and learned a lot about how life works. Perhaps I have been blessed in a special way.
kittypaws
I wish I could say under cover is about lustful sex, groping and tasting every inch of someone while engaging in enjoyable activities under the sheets; sadly not in this tale.
I had a debt to pay. This one came from my aspiration to please; please and win back someone who meant the world to me….it was a stupid, stupid, stupid idea. However, at that point in time it seemed worth pursuing and it landed me in very serious trouble and my goal was never accomplished. You have to remember, Big Brother is always watching and if you are involved enough in illegal activities HE will know where to find you.
I found myself working undercover for the DEA. Nothing to snicker at as there were many dangerous moments. I was not an officer, just a piece of “blonde bait” which when said, even to this day, makes me want to take an acid bath to cleanse myself as this resolution caused me much agony and self disrespect.
I was first assigned to DC Jones of the DEA who was a real ***. He had red hair, was short and always very cynical towards me. He even made me give up my gun, which left me with no protection other then Ron and Dave, the two undercover agents that I was to work with. Ron was a very good looking man (good dancer too!) and Dave, HA ~ I barely remember him. They were both my age and fit well into the scenes that would unfold in my life.
We would travel out to bars and pool halls, sometimes we even went to very elaborate parties; something your imagination would have a difficult time dreaming up, trust me, even I was surprised and very little caught me off guard. I was the pawn in the game, disgusting I know. I would approach the one selling the drugs, flirt and flatter; it never took much…. and get them to either share with me or sell me some of their goods. I wore a mike which was concealed in a button on my blouse. There was even a few times, especially at the bars, I would step outside with the supplier and just as the transaction went down Ron and Dave would appear with badges flashing and guns drawn and yes, they do say, “Freeze! You are under arrest!” I hated what I was doing, but it would save my *** in the long run.
After a number of these bust, the threats started to roll in. Death threats, mostly from girlfriends of those sent to prison. I almost at some point wish they had enough guts to carry them out as I felt that was what I deserved.
There were a couple of threats that brought the DEA to my front door and rushed me off to safety….very real and scary. I was told I could return home after a few days of living in hotels and moving daily, that the threat was “removed”. And unfortunately, I knew what that means from first hand experience. The DEA made sure to keep me safe as I had much to share that would prove lethal to some of the biggest drug lords at that time.
The District Attorney assigned me an attorney who couldn’t care two ****s about me. I was doomed and looking at spending the rest of my life in prison. I have always been ‘street smart’ and learned at a young age about common sense and how to handle people. It’s a gift….which I have noticed not many people have ever grasped. I never try to harm anyone; just move them around or myself around so everything works out. I did not want to spend my life in prison so I managed to get on the good side of the DA. Her name was Glyda Gordon or GG. She liked me and took me under her guidance. Ever day for months I had to go to the DEA/FBI building for hearings and testimonials, and every morning I woke with stomach cramps and nausea from what I was living. I even testified in front of the Supreme Court! Damn! How stupid had I been! Nothing gained but everything lost.
Well, GG helped me through a hell of a mess….even though she (The DA) was prosecuting me; she stood beside me and told me what and how to say and testify against the drug lords. She promised me protection if needed and was a friend to a degree. I reckon in all honesty, she was just trying to get “her man.” The trial came and lasted for six days with police offices guarding me and many defendants and their attorneys filing in and out of the court room. I was on the stand for three days…..three excruciating days. I always kept my composure and answered every thing with truth.
As I look back, someone ~ and I know who ~ turned me in for the same reason, and you know what? I understand why….talk about learning how life works and understand people and why they do what they do. Great insight as I tend to now look beyond the oblivious, as I find that a face is just a plain face and it is only looking into and being involved in a person you know them.
I am not a ‘bad’ person, I just stumbled and fell deep… and learned a lot about how life works. Perhaps I have been blessed in a special way.
kittypaws