Hello- Grammar Feedback

[robga29]

Hello All,

The shuffling of papers, the whirlwind of people, the array of languages swirled around me as I stepped foot into the Washington Reagan International Airport.

Is there anyway I can list without using an and while still being grammatically correct?

Thanks!

[billl]

Hello All,

The shuffling of papers, the whirlwind of people, the array of languages swirled around me as I stepped foot into the Washington Reagan International Airport.

Is there anyway I can list without using an and while still being grammatically correct?

Thanks!

The only correction I would really want to make to that fragment is:
"...as I set foot in Washington D.C.'s Reagan International Airport."
OR
"...as I entered Washington D.C.'s Reagan International Airport."

The "D.C." part might not be necessary, I guess.

---------------------------------------------------------
In regards to your question: the way that you wrote that sentence seems fine to me, since you are writing in a fictional (or more likely, autobiographical?) voice, and so grammatical requirements aren't so strict. Your brief example here flows much as your thoughts or speech might, the commas create just the right amount of a pause, and so it seems fine to me. Well, perhaps "an array of languages" would be better than "the array..."

But in a situation where you are writing an academic essay on some subject, or something like that, you really wouldn't get away with that sort of construction.

Finally, I want to point out:
The first two phrases (about the papers and the people) don't really match up with the verb "swirl" very well. "Shuffling" and "whirlwind" sort of make "whirling" redundant. I don't think that punctuation is the problem as much as word choice might be. This is close to working quite well, but it is still a little awkward.

However, if you do this:

The shuffling of papers, the whirlwind of people... An array of languages swirled around me as I took my first steps in Reagan International Airport.

...I think you might get what you are looking for--with a sort of emphasis on the languages as being a little more important to you than the confusion of papers and people.

[robga29]

Thank You for the feedback!