Ready

[Jerrybaldy]

I didn't think I was up to much
just sleepless, buggered and fretting.
Spilling thoughts, that would never be wiped
unveiling too much, too quick
like a first night working stripper.
Like a worried rabid dog
barking at waves with a wagging tail
running along the shore.
But frantic behind the scenes
I prepared all along to let go.

[Delta40]

a tapestry of anxiety, concern, timing, spillage, hastiness, metaphors to cover the real motive in the end. love the dark barking and spilling thoughts never to be wiped (or typed)

Sometimes I want to dig deeper for sublime meanings but little orange pills prevent me right now. I can still remember that I am your greatest fan Jerry.

[Scheherazade]

Even though you tell us your story through metaphors, without revealing the real story behind much, it is enough for us to write our own stories, filling in the gaps on our own - probably each of us basing it on our own experiences, finding a piece of our own in this poem, Jerry.

Despite its strong content, there is room for a punctuation revision, which is, in my opinion, making the poem a little hard to read and follow as it is.

[hillwalker]

I'm still struggling to get to grips with the last couplet - what does it all signify?

But I love the comparisons to a hasty stripper and mad dog. I can sense the turmoil, that dreaded insomnia where we replay the day just gone, or anticipate what lies ahead.

I'm wondering though what the narrator is 'ready' to do next.

H

[Hawkman]

I have to agree with everything hill said on this one. I follow the journey but the destination is obscure. But yes, the imagery and pace are excellent.

Best, H