Last night, I dreamed of you again

[angliholic]

Last night, I dreamed of you again~

Like a dandelion seed blowing in the wind to an exotic land,
you kept flying farther away from my humble world.

We met unexpectedly on a country path,
and we felt so euphoric
we almost forgot it was just a sweet encounter,
and the happy moment flew faster than our imagination.

We almost forgot it's time to move on in the journey of life
after exchanging our directions with each other.

[Buh4Bee]

Although the sentiment is sweet, this is more like a letter written to your loved one than a poem.

[hillwalker]

I liked the sentiment also. The occasional word could have been trimmed to make it a litle more lyrical (and so seem less like prose) but it has your gentle touch as always.

Perhaps the repetition of 'we almost forgot' is more careless than intentional (though I could be wrong - and apologies if I am)

and the phrase

'we felt so euphoric'

commits one of those sins everybody goes on about when commenting on writing

- it tells rather than shows the reader how you felt so it is not very effective.

H

[GEETASHREE]

Last night, I dreamed of you again~

Like a dandelion seed blowing in the wind to an exotic land,
you kept flying farther away from my humble world.

We met unexpectedly on a country path,
and we felt so euphoric
we almost forgot it was just a sweet encounter,
and the happy moment flew faster than our imagination.

We almost forgot it's time to move on in the journey of life
after exchanging our directions with each other.


As usual I liked what I read. Poetry is all about feeling. If we delve too much in the technicalities, we miss the feel of the verse.

[aliengirl]

Although it is not as poetic as some of your poems, it is nice as always. I like the last two lines very much.