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Delta40
10-01-2010, 06:47 PM
Waves of nausea
carry my roly poly head
in liquid bottles
of hot and cold flushes
to a pinnacle of pain
where I would rather
birth twins feet first
than have kidneys
zoolane
10-01-2010, 06:48 PM
:grouphug: I wish could help with your pain and hope ease soon.
Delta40
10-01-2010, 06:51 PM
I am actually feeling better except for a gluggy head which is like a persistent hangover and doesn't go away. Thanks for the hug and I will start reviewing other posts soon but I can't stand staring at a screen for too long.
Jerrybaldy
10-01-2010, 06:55 PM
Hugs for Delta. Oh no hold on. sorry. This piece of mediocre poetry should not be posted . Have you read the greats before posting. Did you not know quality cannot control itself? I need to reflect upon your poem and see if it is worthy of posting as it could be taking a place that some greater writer could be filling. You have to ask yourself would wordsworth or shelley have posted of their pain way before you hit the post new thread button. Some readers may be disappointed that you wrote this and posted without first analysing the whole thing. Personally I am glad you posted and long may you and me continue with others.
Delta40
10-01-2010, 07:03 PM
I was going to post your great poem digested into itself by another great poem but my driving greatness superseded the need to make you great
Jerrybaldy
10-01-2010, 07:09 PM
I know not of what you speak but you were right to put your greater greatness first. I would like to apologise for this frankly frivolous response that really should not be posted.
Delta40
10-01-2010, 07:10 PM
I am the GREATOR!
Jerrybaldy
10-01-2010, 07:12 PM
You are the strongest but not for the longest.
Delta40
10-01-2010, 07:13 PM
want to co-write about the Great Greator?
Jerrybaldy
10-01-2010, 07:19 PM
oh for sure
Haunted
10-01-2010, 07:35 PM
can you tolerate another hug? This one's from the big grizzly.


birth twins feet first
than have kidneys

Now that's pain! Brilliant analogy.

I'll get back to you with what I hate about the poem later. :p
Delta40
10-01-2010, 07:46 PM
Do that Haunted - I am not mediocre - I can take it!
Haunted
10-01-2010, 07:49 PM
OK Delta, don't you have better things to write about then pain?

I think you have too many kidneys and no heart!

what are you, a wuzz?

now you have to tear down my poems or you're not allowed to comment.
Delta40
10-01-2010, 07:52 PM
lol. sickness is never a good defence - even to say 'stop picking on me!'

I will now critque your work....