Residual Pain

[Delta40]

Cursory Father
ration book man of affection
and a whole pack short
of Happy Families
I see you give your lovers child
a dizzy wizzy in the park
on a spring afternoon

That's the view from my side
This road where
logistical nightmares get dumped
Read the no entry path
to my heart
weep as you unload and move on
From my stone kerb
I watch you thrive
Come feel the cool touch
of walled up hope engulf me

[dafydd manton]

Delta, there seems to be some real hurt in here, a real sense of betrayal, bordering on hatred. (Destructive, but hard to avoid sometimes!)

I found myself almost wide-eyed with astonishment at the power in here, and the sense of despair in the last two lines. I so hope, for your sake, that it's fictitious!

[PrinceMyshkin]

I'm with Dafy: it's a deeply painful & pain-filled poem, but so strong in its expression. brava!

[hillwalker]

It's a despairing glimpse of life and its cruel realities - presumably from a child's eye view?

For such a short poem it is crammed with memorable lines - the entire scenario best summed up in

'That's the view from my side/of the road'

H

[zoolane]

I like this powerful words in stool this peom, their great saddness from 3rd line in v1 to end and I imagine alone child sitting on kerb just wait their father anyone to take notice.

Great poem.

[MystyrMystyry]

Saddest of all I've read all day, Delta

Very very very good







And amazing - very amazing

[Delta40]

Thanks MM. It is one of my favourites.

[everyadventure]

Wonderfully horrible, Delta. Very nice job.

[MorpheusSandman]

This is a tremendously powerful piece. One more stanza would probably have been too much to bear. Above everything else, I love how you manage to make it incredibly emotional without even getting close to melodrama, hyperbole, or affectation. It reads as something really raw and genuine, which makes it all the more powerful. Excellent.