After The Rains

[GEETASHREE]

The leaves are still wet with the tears of a bygone rain
The sky is still morose with the reminisce of a past pour
The clouds still hang around like the echo of a desperate wail
The birds have still not picked up the thread of the song last chirped
The wind bemoans the morsel of a grain blown away to a faraway land
The meadows have” saronged” a sequined sheet of pearly dew drops around
The bathed alleys, gullies, the pathways shine in the pale moonshine
A pall of mist rises as though a phoenix from a heap of” grime”
The croons of the night sounds waft softly encircling the surround
Recedes a drenched night on tiptoe to welcome the grey daylight
A calm before the storm prevails a lull before the chime
And I have not yet stitched the drape over a tale long heard unwind
In bemused silence to be buried in the weeping sands of time

It had again rained pell mell throughout the previous night…………

[GEETASHREE]

Sorry, couldn't resist posting a second one tonight!

[hillwalker]

Some incredibly inspired images here - especially lines 4, 6-8 and 12-13

There are a couple of minor syntactical slip-ups where you unsuccessfully try to use verbs as nouns

- the reminisce ('reminisce' is a verb - 'reminiscence' the noun)
- a past pour ('pour' is a verb - 'downpour' sounds better I think)
- the croons ('croon' is also a verb - 'crooning' makes better sense)
and - the surround (can be a noun - but normally it refers to a framework around something like an indoor fire - 'surroundings' is what you mean I think)

H

[angliholic]

I can see the scenes after the rain you described!
It's fantastic and refreshing!
I love this one, Geeta!

[GEETASHREE]

Some incredibly inspired images here - especially lines 4, 6-8 and 12-13

There are a couple of minor syntactical slip-ups where you unsuccessfully try to use verbs as nouns

- the reminisce ('reminisce' is a verb - 'reminiscence' the noun)
- a past pour ('pour' is a verb - 'downpour' sounds better I think)
- the croons ('croon' is also a verb - 'crooning' makes better sense)
and - the surround (can be a noun - but normally it refers to a framework around something like an indoor fire - 'surroundings' is what you mean I think)

H

Mr. Hill, glad once again for your visit and critique. I just wanted to find out whether such liberties could be taken without hurting any reader's poetic sensibilities (like croon for croonings, reminisce for reminiscence, pour for downpour and surround for surrounding)

It appears not.

To your experienced and discerning eyes!

[GEETASHREE]

I can see the scenes after the rain you described!
It's fantastic and refreshing!
I love this one, Geeta!

Angli, thanks again dear for your kind comments!

[hillwalker]

I just wanted to find out whether such liberties could be taken without hurting any reader's poetic sensibilities

They most certainly can - and I take back my comments regarding syntax - it is called poetic licence (the poet is always right)!!! Well done for exercising yours, my friend.

H :-)

[GEETASHREE]

Thanks Mr. Hill!