Changeling

[Hawkman]

I have seen her
lie as glass beneath the haze,
when bow-waves, folding at the prow,
rest proud and white upon the silken tide
and hesitate to die.

On such a day,
reflected sun, in dazzling arcs of light,
will blind the lazy eye, whose pin-point pupil
then eclipses shade, to make the daylight
darker to the sight.

I have seen her in a mottled rage,
foaming at the lips of waves,
when green and purple troughs
form fluid valleys twixt the peaks
of trembling mountain tops.

Grey then the dawn, whose sullen mood
and morbid sky, preferring sleep to waking life,
deny that eye an entrance worthy of its rank,
and so the clouds will weep their bitter tears
to drench her folds with howling wind-lashed spears.

I have seen her beating at the shore,
so cruel a mistress, lashing rocks
with whitened whips, that fray in spindrift flocks
that blow inland; a foam to suffocate the fire
which we would light to ward off her intemperate ire.

And I have seen her then return her dead,
with such compassion, lay them on a sandy bed.
And when relinquishing their hold, her chilly fingers,
having washed that flesh, now cold,
recede in shame at having caused such pain.

[dafydd manton]

Really shows your tremendous affinity with th sea, Hawk. Only a man with the sea in his veins could have written this. A lovely piece of work, if I may say so. Thanks very much.

[Hawkman]

To tell the truth I hated it when it was lumpy.

My shins are scarred with hatch-rash
my blood is red like yours
though when I've been a drinking
then the rum leaks out my pores.

Now when it's rough and lumpy
my stomach feels quite ill
I always found them useless
those ruddy sea-sick pills.

But when the sea was tranquil
at midnight I would stand
upon the sweep-deck drinking
from the beer glass in my hand

My fishing rod deployed and primed
I'd trawl the inky depths
to catch myself some supper
with a longline, not with nets.

But now those days are over
and I never go to sea
for one thing no-one's paying
so ashore I'd rather be.

:D

[PrinceMyshkin]

I confess to a small bit of disappointment that "pain" at the end of the final line did not have a rhyme to answer to, even though you'd set a precedent for that in one or two of the earlier stanzas,

but that's a small matter by contrast with the pleasure I got from the richness of the language and imagery, and from the decorum of the whole.

[hillwalker]

There's something hypnotic about this one Hawk, rather like watching the waves' endless trawl. You have done a fantastic job of personifying the sea here - one of your best without a doubt.

[Hawkman]

Thanks Prince, but with the internal rhyme of shame/pain on that last line I thought it would be overloading it. Serious question, does the internal rhyme not work for you?

best, H

[Hawkman]

Thanks hill, I really appreciate that because it was an absolute bugger to write :D Been working on it all day...

H

[dafydd manton]

I can understand your not liking it when it was lumpy. I used to look down at you lads when it was rough, and be very grateful for being in a nice warm aeroplane. I can't repeat the phrases that ran through the head, but they were sympathetic. I much preferred crab grey to navy blue, as well.

[Hawkman]

I was chuggin around the oggin as was my wont, when suddenly I was overflown by a Jaguar. Now they were rare beasties in that neck of the woods as usually I only saw them in South American jungles, where they were famed for climbin trees and droppin on people. However, I later learned that this particular Jaguar had eaten my bessy oppo from school, who had joined the RAF just before I joined the mob. Apparently none the worse for having been eaten by this flying cat, he was bein given a jolly on gettin posted from his station. Found out later when we met up for a pint that he'd been in it.

:D

[dafydd manton]

Bang on, old boy. Excellent wheeze, what, swannin' around at Angels 15, havin' the odd squirt at Jerry. Great sport, then back to the mess for a snifter. *Twitches moustache which actually got shaved off in 1998*

Odd, isn't it, that Service life seemed to revolve around "going for a pint". How have any of us got livers left?

Great couple of poems, me old matelot.

[PrinceMyshkin]

Thanks Prince, but with the internal rhyme of shame/pain on that last line I thought it would be overloading it. Serious question, does the internal rhyme not work for you?

best, H

I must confess that I totally overlooked the "shame/pain" slant-rhyme. It did not (and still does not) have enough of a ring for me. Besides which, I was spoiled by the excellent end-rhymes that had come before it and don't recall being tutored by any earlier internal rhymes.

That's a lot of words re one quibble by contrast with the magnificence of the poem overall.

[Jerrybaldy]

I think I know this lady ;)
I love the sea and enjoyed your ode to her temperamentality
cheers Hawk
Jerry B

[dafydd manton]

Is it because that we are an Island people that we have this affinity? I'd love to know what others who live on great land-masses think.

[Delta40]

You have a great way with words Hawk. Isn't it odd how nature is a woman?

[dafydd manton]

Odd, Delta, but no suprise.

[Hawkman]

Bang on, old boy. Excellent wheeze, what, swannin' around at Angels 15, havin' the odd squirt at Jerry. Great sport, then back to the mess for a snifter. *Twitches moustache which actually got shaved off in 1998*

Odd, isn't it, that Service life seemed to revolve around "going for a pint". How have any of us got livers left?

Great couple of poems, me old matelot.

Thanks again Dafydd. by the way, the story I told is absolutely true at least about the aircraft and my school chum. It was some time later that I found out that He'd been in the plane. An occasion when our leaves mutually coincided and we happened to be in the same place. Sadly I've lost touch with him now.


I must confess that I totally overlooked the "shame/pain" slant-rhyme. It did not (and still does not) have enough of a ring for me. Besides which, I was spoiled by the excellent end-rhymes that had come before it and don't recall being tutored by any earlier internal rhymes.

That's a lot of words re one quibble by contrast with the magnificence of the poem overall.

Well I'm glad you enjoyed it anyway, my Prince. (by the way, there is also a hold/cold internal rhyme in the same verse :D)


I think I know this lady ;)
I love the sea and enjoyed your ode to her temperamentality
cheers Hawk
Jerry B

JB thank you too. I spent most of my time on samll ships so I became particulalry sensitive to motion sickness. It was only when I eventually got back on to a frigate (only marginally smaller than a WW11 Cruiser) that I could stand being out in anything over a force 8 :D When it's calm the sea is wonderful. When it's in a bad mood it's scary as hell. I really didn't like things like typwriters landing on me when the ship rolled 45 degrees, or disappeared into one of those troughs I mentioned in the poem.


Is it because that we are an Island people that we have this affinity? I'd love to know what others who live on great land-masses think.

Some of the greates sailors have been drawn from land locked areas.


You have a great way with words Hawk. Isn't it odd how nature is a woman?

Thanks Delta. It stems from our beleif in female dieties & demigods I expect. :D Mother nature and Calypso spring to mind and coupled with the fact that the sea in particular can go from crooning at you like a lover to throwing stuff at you with all the enthusiasm of a pre-menstral cougar on steroids, in the blink of an eye :D


Odd, Delta, but no suprise.

see above.

Thank you all for reading and appreciating this poem.

Live long and prosper.

Hawk.

[Lokasenna]

Excellent!

You really catch the movement of the sea, and your use imagery is breath-taking!

[Hawkman]

Thanks Lokasenna, I'm glad you enjoyed it, after all, it was your poem that inspired me to write it :D

Live and be Well, H

[hack]

It seems that everyone is drawn to the sea, landlubbers like myself, or those born to it.
I always enjoy your descriptions of the ocean and its ships. This is quite exceptional,
even by your high standards Hawk. Thanks...peace...

[Hawkman]

Thanks, hack I am very gratified that you enjoyed it so much.

Live long and prosper,

H