Paul Gray

[breathtest]

Not sure if i like this much, but i wrote it as an ode to the Slipknot bassist Paul Gray when he died a month or two ago. I've always felt the band were very talented even though a lot of people don't even respect them for being good musicians, which they certainly are. Their acoustic songs Vermillion pt 2 and Snuff show how talented they really are, i think.

Anyway my friends Aunt used to babysit for Paul Gray when he was a kid, so i suppose that's another reason why i wrote this...


Gray hero of masked
shadows,
what lugubrious depths
had you felt in your hotel room?

Pills that will help to ease
your black eyelids.

Peaks of pale dawn in
NY with money,
at the back of the stage
with no identity but 2.

Has your hair hardened,
have your teeth become
stone,
or
flesh tinged yellow?

highway dawn and screaming
hell in the back
of America,
back alley America,
sniffing dead jars and glaring,
forgetting the flames
upon which the music
was built
and reconstructed

Did you know the legacy?

The greatest bliss for you,
and this is an elegy,
ode to a dark stranger,
cupping silent bass
in the muse
and curse of life



I'd love comments. I would have revised it a bit but i was scared that it would take away the feeling from it...

[Hawkman]

I'm afraid that not being familiar with the subject or his music I'm missing out on some of the references. But even without them it comes over as a powerful poem. It reads well too.

Best, H

[PrinceMyshkin]

I think it's a wonderful example of entering as far as you could into the spirit of another person without going too far, and though I'm not 100% sure what "the greatest bliss for you" refers to (except, presumably, what you have specified before that line, I was extremely moved by that last verse and especially by:


and this is an elegy

as if that weren't plain enough already! Well done.

[Sandi]

I am sure, being who he was, life could be dark even death.

[hillwalker]

You do a great job of detailing the 'rock-star' lifestyle
and personalising the agonies of the 'tortured artist'
without glamourising it or making it sound at all mawkish

so I would have to agree, a job well done.

[breathtest]

Hawkman - thank you for taking the time

Prince - 'The greatest bliss for you' is simply me hoping he is at peace, wishing for him to be in a place of bliss. Thank you for reading and commenting.

Sandi - yes i think parts of his life were very dark.

Hillwalker - thanks for the compliment

[Bar22do]

Thanks for introducing me to this dark poignant artist... If this is written without revising, then it's an admirable achievement (in my eyes at least)! The last four lines are strong and frame your poem so well. Kudos. Bar

[breathtest]

Thanks Bar22do, i quite like the last lines too.