kittypaws
08-02-2010, 10:28 PM
As a male How would You feel? As a female what do You think?
Hello My Darling,
Sorry I did not respond to your call earlier but today was a bizarre day for me. This morning while walking Zeus, we came across a deer bedded down in the field and we stopped to admire her. Fortunately Zeus could not see her cuz of his position however I had good eye contact and spoke to her in a soft, gentle voice. She did not bolt and there was a very peaceful feeling to the whole event. A few minutes later my legs started itching and burning as I had received about 13 mosquito bites and they were welting up fast and serious. By the time we got to the house I was crawling in my skin and immediately soaped up my legs to try to relieve the pain; but it did very little. I ran upstairs and got the anti itch lotion and that barely phased the red welts. I took a shower scrubbing/scratching my legs and on the way to work I stopped at the pharmacy and they recommended some other lotion. I used half the bottle today just trying to stop the itch. I felt irritated all over now and very tense and aggravated. An uneasy feeling was surging inside me and I felt like spontaneous combustion was approaching. I struggled to concentrate and get thru the day even after the itching had eased some.
Then another really weird thing happened. I became very sad. Tears started to run down my cheeks and my chest became very heavy. I am not sure if your question about out relationship caused it or the conversation with my friend who is having serious marital problems or the thoughts of my sister as a widow. I cried all the way home. It was a soft cry; when only tears fall and you have that feeling of emptiness. I stopped up at the park and walked out to the boulder that Zeus and I usually visit and sat there and watched the sun set and quietly let my feelings run out of me. I kept trying to figure out what had made me so sad. The answer that resounded in me was that I felt so lonely, so unimportant, so lost, so un-loved. I have always said that I could handle being alone but I did not do well with loneness. It is a cold, dark shadow that washes the life out of my soul.
Many years ago I found the man of my dreams. Life was at the top and strong. Then he left me for a lady with bigger tits. Do you believe that! And I thought he had loved me for who I was. What a fool I was and even managed to outdo myself by proving I could be even a better fool. I got involved with dealings drugs thru him. That way I would still see him and be a part of his life. Talk about being a dumbass! I almost lost years of my life when everything went south but I managed to savage myself from prison. However, I still lost the man of my dreams and sat alone. Which is probably a good thing cuz it appears he really didn’t love me. I don’t know why I am telling you this, perhaps I am trying to cleanse myself. I honestly don’t know.
But I do know one thing. You complete me; which means to me you make me very happy and feel special and are a precious part of my life now. That does not mean that sex is on the agenda, it means we are the best of friends. And as the best of friends we share the beautiful and the ugly of our lives and don’t condemn. We are here for each other and to take care of each. If sex follows again in time, so be it. In my mind, now is the time to grow in each other.
I’m in this relationship for the long run, how about You?
Your Angel and filled with love for You,
Kitty
Hello My Darling,
Sorry I did not respond to your call earlier but today was a bizarre day for me. This morning while walking Zeus, we came across a deer bedded down in the field and we stopped to admire her. Fortunately Zeus could not see her cuz of his position however I had good eye contact and spoke to her in a soft, gentle voice. She did not bolt and there was a very peaceful feeling to the whole event. A few minutes later my legs started itching and burning as I had received about 13 mosquito bites and they were welting up fast and serious. By the time we got to the house I was crawling in my skin and immediately soaped up my legs to try to relieve the pain; but it did very little. I ran upstairs and got the anti itch lotion and that barely phased the red welts. I took a shower scrubbing/scratching my legs and on the way to work I stopped at the pharmacy and they recommended some other lotion. I used half the bottle today just trying to stop the itch. I felt irritated all over now and very tense and aggravated. An uneasy feeling was surging inside me and I felt like spontaneous combustion was approaching. I struggled to concentrate and get thru the day even after the itching had eased some.
Then another really weird thing happened. I became very sad. Tears started to run down my cheeks and my chest became very heavy. I am not sure if your question about out relationship caused it or the conversation with my friend who is having serious marital problems or the thoughts of my sister as a widow. I cried all the way home. It was a soft cry; when only tears fall and you have that feeling of emptiness. I stopped up at the park and walked out to the boulder that Zeus and I usually visit and sat there and watched the sun set and quietly let my feelings run out of me. I kept trying to figure out what had made me so sad. The answer that resounded in me was that I felt so lonely, so unimportant, so lost, so un-loved. I have always said that I could handle being alone but I did not do well with loneness. It is a cold, dark shadow that washes the life out of my soul.
Many years ago I found the man of my dreams. Life was at the top and strong. Then he left me for a lady with bigger tits. Do you believe that! And I thought he had loved me for who I was. What a fool I was and even managed to outdo myself by proving I could be even a better fool. I got involved with dealings drugs thru him. That way I would still see him and be a part of his life. Talk about being a dumbass! I almost lost years of my life when everything went south but I managed to savage myself from prison. However, I still lost the man of my dreams and sat alone. Which is probably a good thing cuz it appears he really didn’t love me. I don’t know why I am telling you this, perhaps I am trying to cleanse myself. I honestly don’t know.
But I do know one thing. You complete me; which means to me you make me very happy and feel special and are a precious part of my life now. That does not mean that sex is on the agenda, it means we are the best of friends. And as the best of friends we share the beautiful and the ugly of our lives and don’t condemn. We are here for each other and to take care of each. If sex follows again in time, so be it. In my mind, now is the time to grow in each other.
I’m in this relationship for the long run, how about You?
Your Angel and filled with love for You,
Kitty