nucleus

[Lumiere]

' "You'd better write the
hell out of yourself or
die.
Maybe both"
said the young
poet to himself '





, wrote the old
poet and leaned

back in his chair

[Hawkman]

Rather a sad reflection on the ambition of the poet versus their achievement :D made me smile though.

[PrinceMyshkin]

Bit of self-mockery? I do admire the economy of it.

[Lumiere]

Bit of self-mockery? I do admire the economy of it.

Oh, more than a bit.

Hawk:
ambition is a hungry beastie, eh?
Thanks for stopping by.

[Bar22do]

' "You'd better write the
hell out of yourself or
die.
Maybe both"
said the young
poet to himself '





, wrote the old
poet and leaned

back in his chair

Self-mockery put aside, I read in conclusion of this admirable poem that the old poet complied with his young age challenge: he did both, wrote and died right away! ("leaned back in his chair" suggests to me that it is final) - a nice way to go, after all... but at a very very old age, please poets.
And for the time being - flourish strong and healthy! Bar

[hack]

, wrote the old
poet and leaned

back in his chair

Please don't call 911 should I lean back.
A comma can be a wonderful achievement,
more often though, it, is, a real, bother.

[lallison]

The irony and punctuation are equally magnificent, and as one has the opportunity to admire irony more than punctuation, I'd say the interesting punctuation is the greater achievement. To me, this speaks of the wisdom and experience of the old being greater than the rashness and vitality of the youth. The economy of word and the contrast of character work wonderfully and say much, much more than the 28 words of your poem. Exalt! lal

[Sampson]

This is a fantastic piece. I have recently been mucking about with the idea of people writing poems in poems and it all got a bit out of hand... This is a wicked example of how powerful the idea can be, presented in a beautifully concise manner!

[Lumiere]

To me, this speaks of the wisdom and experience of the old being greater than the rashness and vitality of the youth.

I wouldn't say greater, just different. Fire and water.

Thanks for your kind and insightful comment, lal.

Sampson - thanks.
It is concise only because I don't have the strength of mind to write it otherwise.
Strange, bending topic, this setting poetry in front of a mirror.
I would love to read something of yours on it.