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jaguar12345
06-06-2010, 06:47 AM
"The exquisite corpse will drink the young wine"


Curtains of dusk shed away the blue light
And hazy the frost grows in the shrouding mist
While the moon toils to keep vigil the night
Death-kissed, the darkness haunts with a pale wrist;

She dwells, the maiden, a scalding luster
Her blue, deep, dark unfathomed eyes
Abyss where the black pitch is torn asunder
Whose charmed nightshades cannot fail entice;

Beneath the bosom of the black, grave, lune
Lay the violent fingers that shake the earth
Swirling the curves in a sensual nocturne
And creeps to her legs in careless concert

Slowly revealing - exposed is the frozen robe
The demon feasts upon the pearly mesh
While his silken tongue devours her melting lobe
Defiled - defiled is the ev'ry inch of virgin flesh;

Ah! The radiance that wrapt her bare soul
That still spirit shed from the evening air
Gently dissolves the swarming beads of the pole
Luring the viper out of his rancid lair

Behold! The ritual has finally been lain
Admonishing the rupture of her sanctity
Those lips besmeared with blood and pain
The roaring shaft slowly fills her hollowed chastity;

Faster, faster, faster the drums howl with fervor
'Till they reached the peak, the peak of flowing splendor


'Till;

All alone, she
Crying on the bed naked and torn
Alone, the moon drifts above slowly
Drenched in litanies of sadness, she
Is lonely - the maiden of the frost
She is lost, alone to her fears and
desolation; Inside, the longing eats
a resignation; She - a mess begging
him to stay ;I see that little look you
give away; This poor world has fallen
forever begging forever from a day.





______

Guess it's my first time to post here, and for that I want to say hello to everyone. Currently on :flare: (fire) writing last poem after last poem, I guess the addiction won't stop. And oh, is there any way to change my forum name? ( jaguar12345 is rather a long one )

PrinceMyshkin
06-06-2010, 07:58 AM
I worried at first that the slightly anachronistic diction might get in your way - but I needn't have done. You handle this with such grace, and with empathetic reticence. That last stanza is heartbreaking.

As to changing your name you must write to one of the moderators, Logos or Scheherezade...

Best wishes & I look forward to seeing more of your work.

hillwalker
06-06-2010, 08:35 AM
Fantastic imagery - and I share Prince's praise for that final stanza.

Excellent work.

H

jaguar12345
06-06-2010, 10:19 PM
Thanks P and H. : )

qimissung
06-07-2010, 01:24 AM
I kind of like anachronistic diction and you handled it well.

qimissung
06-07-2010, 10:26 PM
This is such a beautiful, romantic piece of writing. I love it.