Commentary

[dizzydoll]

The atmosphere is
electric

Thirty Love
Thirty All
Forty Thirty
Deuce

He's taking his
time

.....

The next call
Is? :idea:

[dizzydoll]

Perhaps the layout can be improved. Any suggestions?

[lallison]

I think this one is great. A tennis match, you've got suspense, implied action. The few words have much larger implications. It reads very smoothly. I like the form, it leaves the reader hanging on the words. It's a very nice poem. The only thing I think you could change is the name, for me, it didn't say very much.

[dizzydoll]

Thank you for you comment Iall. Actually I was attempting to hide the answer to the poems question, thats why I chose to keep the Title short as Commentary. Others eventually got the answer.......

The answer to this quiz/poem is: Advantage. :coolgleamA:

but the whole flow of the poems interaction has been interupted by the Mod called Sche. Here is the rest of the comments on Princes thread:

http://www.online-literature.com/forums/showthread.php?t=53308

:frown5: