What made you do it?

[SmileBeaut.]

When we were younger,
I was always jealous of you,
I thought your life was perfect,
If only i knew.

What made you do it?
What was so bad?
You should of told me everything,
Why you were so sad.

You always seemed so happy,
Never in despair,
Suicide is like a disease,
But only, not so rare.

If i knew it would effect you,
Id live everyday like the last,
But I'm here reminiscing,
All the days in the past.

I wish you would of talked to me,
I could of made it stop,
But you didn't say anything,
It just pushed you over the top.

I walk into my room at night,
And see you lying there,
With an empty bottle of pills beside you,
With your empty, dead stare.

I have nightmares every night now,
I doubt they'll ever go away,
I don't know what made you do it,
If only you could say.



comment?
H x

[flakjack]

This is very moving, obviously written with a lot of passion, is it based on something that you've been through?

The only thing I noticed that didn't seem quite right to me was the likening of suicide to a disease, but only not so rare. I understand what it means but the wording is a little awkward, sounding a bit like the disease is rarer (which obv isnt the case).

Very powerful stuff and well written for purpose.

[Yvain]

This was a decent poem.

I struck some real emotions.

I am wary of rhyming, but this was not that bad about doing it.