Lady Veronique

[Hawkman]

Lady Veronique was a queen trés chic,
well bred, with a collar by René Lalique.
She stalked through the halls of ancestral piles,
whose corridors stretched for miles and miles,
with perfect poise and with tail erect,
seeking genteel mice that she might dissect.

Her bearing was regal, her glance it flashed fire,
at the sight of her Toms were inflamed with desire,
her delicate feet, with such elegant paws,
were tooled-up with lethally, death-dealing claws.
Her coat was of fur, though entirely her own,
while her bed was of silk and completely home-grown.

Majestical moggy, no malkin was she,
the lady had butlers to bring in her tea
but though she was splendid and haughty and fierce,
she was lonely as hell for her heart was un-pierced
by love-darts from cupid, or anyone else,
until Mr. Merlin cast one of his spells.

Mr. Merlin was cunning and wicked and wise
and the light of enchantment burned deep in his eyes,
for potions most magical gave his life zest,
as this feline familiar had learned from the best.
It was Morgan le Fey, who had shown him the way
with enchantments so dark that they shaded the day.

In vain had our wizard attempted to gain,
the Lady’s cold heart treating all with disdain,
with fair means a failure, resorting to foul,
he summoned a demon with blood-chilling yowl.
Instruction the monster most readily gave
and told him the secret to make her his slave.

While magic is potent its charms can go wrong,
in this modern age it takes more than a song,
meticulous planning was therefore required
and a phial of Rohypnol he slyly acquired.
Then carefully, cunningly, working unseen,
he wickedly spiked Lady Veronique’s cream.

Giving the drug time to take its effect,
into her chamber he stealthily crept.
Though skilled in the dark arts his love was untutored
and sadly our wizard had cruelly been neutered.
Despite all his magic he couldn’t perform
for no known enchantment his jewels could reform.

So sadly unable to slake his desire,
he had no recourse but to madly retire.
The prize was then claimed by a Tom called Dave,
an alley-cat Merlin had used for his slave.
The Lady and Dave then had many a kitten,
though none by the dark arts has ever been smitten.

[PrinceMyshkin]

Here's to Veronique and Dave!
Long may they prosper!
Long may they breed,
though they've already given us
enough of their seed.

[dizzydoll]

I agree with Prince. Even in poetry deceit never pays. Excellent poem. Someone once wrote the most beautiful Merlin poem for me, he is a wizard. lol

[hillwalker]

Brilliant again Hawk. That feline muse certainly earns his/her 'Whiskas'

[Hawkman]

Mry Prince, what of Merlin,
So painful his fate,
frustrated for ever,
his search for a mate...

and thanks!

diz, the fatal feline thanks you for your praise but probably won't hypnotise you with his piercing gaze.

Thanks hill for appreciating my genius :D

Live and be well - H

[Bar22do]

This is a feast!
Light and soooooooo enjoyable! Perfect verse and yes - génial!
And I dis- :iagree: with hill (sorry), the Lady and Dave deserve real organic cat food (or Hawkman made) with no poison in it! especially if she's expecting every so often... Anyhow, this is perfect happiness! Best rgds - Bar

[Hawkman]

Bar, thanks so much for you kind comments (and your picketing smiley). You may rest assured that the lady in question dines exclusively on free-range pedigree mice, although her consort has a preference for stinky fish-heads retreived from bins.

To cat fancying poetry lovers everywhere, I apologise for not being TS Elliot.

Live long and prosper, H

[AuntShecky]

Everything I told you yesterday still goes, but maybe you'll want to change "who's" to "whose," right?

[Hawkman]

Oops! sorted, and thanks. H

[MorpheusSandman]

This is thoroughly entertaining from beginning to end, Hawk. It's so rare to find modern narrative poetry delivered in couplets and consistent quatrains! The rhythm does slip up occasionally, though. Watch out for sections where you have three straight stresses like "the Lady’s cold heart treating all with disdain," which scans -/-///-/--/. In fact, Anapestic feet provides such a strong, distinct rhythm that you really have to watch out for any spots which resort to spondees or even iambs.

[Hawkman]

Hi Morpheus, and thank you. With regard to the apparant imbalance in the stresses.

Surely, If you have established the rhythm and then looking at the line and e.g. place the stresses thus, the Lady's cold heart treating all with disdain then you as the the reader are stressing the wrong syllables.

It should be read like this:

the lady's cold heart treating all with disdain

the key to the rhythm is in the other lines. Is there a set rule which determines what should be a stressed syllable? I have not yet found one but would be happy to be enlightened. Best, H.

[qimissung]

That is one of the most adorable poems I have ever read. My male cats can, sadly, em-paw-thize (:D) with Merlin.

[MorpheusSandman]

Surely, If you have established the rhythm and then looking at the line... then you as the the reader are stressing the wrong syllables... Is there a set rule which determines what should be a stressed syllable? I have not yet found one but would be happy to be enlightened. Best, H.Well, this is an issue I've tussled with myself and have wondered about (in fact, I'd like to read some stuff on it if I knew where to look). The major question is whether or an established meter is enough to maintain that rhythm during sections where the stresses/non-stresses would naturally fall elsewhere. I think the answer REALLY depends on the piece and who's reading it. Even if one does force themselves to maintain the rhythm, I think our natural speech patterns have a tendency to mentally conflict with that rhythm when it's not natural.

While there's no "hard" rules on stressed (it really depends on context), a good guideline is this: Monosyllabic verbs, adjectives, and adverbs are almost always stressed, and with multi-syllabic versions there's usually a stress on the first syllable. Though with verbs it also depends on what kind of verb it is, as auxiliary and intransitive verbs often aren't stressed.

Meanwhile, common prepositions and conjunctions usually aren't stressed, but this also depends on the context. Usually, the English language prefers patterns of one or two unstressed words followed by a stress. That's what makes iambic pentameter such a common meter in English poetry. For instance, if you take a preposition/article pairing like "to the" or "in a" that usually isn't stressed and play around with words of varying lengths in front of and behind them:

I went to the store
I'm going to the store

You can tell how in the second sentence there's a slight stress on "to". That's because having three straight unstressed syllables feels slightly unnatural. There's also what I've come to think of as "stress precedence"
which means that some words simply must be stressed in spite of what's around them. That's why I pointed out that line from your piece: "the lady's cold heart treating all with disdain"

"Cold", being a monosyllabic adjective is a natural stress. In fact, I can't think of any context where you wouldn't naturally stress that word. About the only situation I can think of is where it's the complement to another adjective like "ice cold". But especially given that it follows an unstressed syllable (lady's) there's just no way NOT to stress it. Heart is a natural stress as well, given that it's the object noun. Because of the two straight stresses I think it's more permissible to not stress "treating" but, again, verbs usually contain a stress.

Occasionally, it is okay to substitute spondee's in a ternary pattern like this. In fact, as long as you don't stress "treating" then "cold heart" really doesn't disrupt the rhythm that badly.

But there are definitely sections where the gaff is more noticeable like the last three sentences of the first stanza. Some are easily fixable: "The corridors stretched for miles and miles" could be fixed by adding an "on" after 'stretched". The problem with the last two is that they abruptly switch to iambs and trochees instead of anapests: "With perfect poise and with tail erect" scans -/-/--/-/ while "Seeking genteel mice that she might dissect" scans /-/-/-/--/

The last line is a good example where you often can't force the rhythm because of a conflict of natural stressed. You just can't stress the "ing" part of "seeking" to make it scan -/--/-/--/, which would make the line work.

[lallison]

cute and entertaining to read. You can't miss with cat poems. It brought me back to this gem I learned in elementary school music class: http://www.kididdles.com/lyrics/s038.html

thanks, enjoyed it

[Hawkman]

qim, Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it, but my heart goes out to your maimed moggies :D

Morpheus, thanks for your in-depth reply. I confess that adding 'on' to the 'miles and miles' was something I hummed and ha'd about. It was originally there but I took it out because it looked wrong. I may put it back in. Looking at your last citation vis 'Seeking genteel mice that she might dissect' the problem would seem to be resolved if you don't stress 'she', which is how I intended it should be read. However, I will give this the matter of stresses further thought, so thanks for drawing my attention to it.

lall, thanks to you too and I'm glad you enjoyed it and for the link, Meow, Meow, Meow...

Via con Dios, H

[hillwalker]

Morpheus - I was fascinated to read your piece on metre.

It's a tricky topic - and so important once you have got the words down on paper to realise how they sound when read out loud.

The English language does not make it easy to master -

words like 'proceeds', 'rebel' and 'project' take on different meanings depending on whether the first or second syllable is stressed!

Then, of course some words are stressed differently in 'English' English and 'American' English - 'mandatory', 'magazine', 'cigarette', and 'lamentable' to name just a few.

Phew.....

[blank|verse]

More cat poems, H-man, who do you think you are - TS Eliot? Another enjoyable piece, though.

As for the issue of stress (I've not read all the posts so excuse any repetition) but the 'rule' is how the word is stressed naturally. Check the dictionary if you're unsure, it should tell you how to pronounce words.

In poetry, it's bad form to force an unnatural stress where there shouldn't be one, although this is more excusable with lighter verse, doggerel or 'skeltonics' for example. It depends what the context is.

You wouldn't pronounce the words differently in conversation, or else people would question why you're pronouncing words wrongly. Or think you're weird. That's the difference between poetry and song lyrics, where you can twist the syllables deliberately to fit the tune. You can't do that with poetry because the singer is the reader.

[Hawkman]

I think I know how to use a dictionary.

Actually BV I dont think the issue is as much with stressed syllables in this piece as in the emphasis given to certain words. (if you get the difference). However, there are certainly differences in stress in multi syllabic words in customary usage by UK English and US English speakers. See hill's post.

I'm glad you enjoyed it though.

[MorpheusSandman]

Looking at your last citation vis 'Seeking genteel mice that she might dissect' the problem would seem to be resolved if you don't stress 'she', which is how I intended it should be read.Even if you skirt around she then "might" would still be stressed which automatically turns the last two syllables into an iambic pattern: "SEEking GENteel MICE that she MIGHT diSSECT"


Morpheus - I was fascinated to read your piece on metre. It's a tricky topic - and so important once you have got the words down on paper to realise how they sound when read out loud. The English language does not make it easy to master - words like 'proceeds', 'rebel' and 'project' take on different meanings depending on whether the first or second syllable is stressed! Then, of course some words are stressed differently in 'English' English and 'American' English - 'mandatory', 'magazine', 'cigarette', and 'lamentable' to name just a few.All good points. Stress is undeniably idiomatic by nature which can differ in the same languages between countries and even parts of that country. One good example is how natural diphthongs are handled. Words like "fire" and "ruin" can be one or two syllable words depending on how the diphthong is handled, and ruin, especially, can be either "roo-in" or "roon" with there only being the slightest hint of an "i" in the second example.