Inspired by breathtest ( and hack ;)

[tailor STATELY]

Beneath the Dogwoods of May

my rock garden
tenderly raked
attracts a dragonfly
who alights
upon a bamboo
chime oblivious
to the susurrus
of the city
beyond my gates

aroused a toad
heretofore
ignoring a pond
of lazy harlequin koi
nearby
beneath a row of
white flowered Yarrow
slowly wends her way
through intricately
placed stones

where conflict
was unknown
a one-sided waiting
game ensues

keeping nearly still
head askance
mouth quivering
ever so slightly
the toad
contemplates
the wing washing
focus
of the dragonfly

a puff of wind
resolves the conflict
prodding the chimes
to woodenly chortle
startling the innocence
of the dragonfly
who departs whirring
to otherworldly
gardens beyond the
toad's grasp

released from her
alertness the toad
hobbles a pace
to sun herself upon
my favorite stone
inscribed with the name
hack

and peace reigns
once more in
my garden

tailor STATELY
5-1-2010


note1: (lol) at least in this version the name will be hack

note2: I wonder what the modulation pattern (the poem viewed sideways) would sound like ? Another project to ponder.

note3: Who's PMing ?

[Virgil]

I have no idea as to what your notes allude to, but this was a wondereful little moment captured in poetry. I liked the language and in particular the rhythm of it. A very good poem Tailor.

[tailor STATELY]

Thank you Virgil

The inspiration as I noted is by breathtest (chaos, reflection and holy gardens (http://www.online-literature.com/forums/showthread.php?t=52733)) who recently wrote a poem eliciting comment this evening/morning?, and hack who wrote of his garden a while ago where "he could name every stone" (note1).

I only wish I had such a garden, drawing further inspiration from Hakone Gardens (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hakone_Gardens) in Saratoga, CA which was a favorite stop of mine when I lived in the South Bay Area of S.F.; and a little very-quick study of "Book of Changes" or I Ching to set a mood.

note2 refers to my occasional (amateurish) brushes with writing and editing music - the waveform produced by sounds/music look like my poem's 'look' if viewed sideways; and I thought to reproduce the resultant wave pattern and see/hear what it would sound like with a tweek or two.

note3 refers to a PM I received while in my creative phase - which I apologize for not getting to in a timely fashion.

[Hawkman]

I think this is a cracking poem tS. The only line which bugs me is:

"issuing a withdraw" in s5 which. although I know what you mean, I think is a little inelegent in the face of all the other flowing lines.

Live and be well - H

[tailor STATELY]

Thank you Hawkman.

I'll consider your advice ; very few of my poems are carved in stone.

Done and done.

[hack]

Cousin,
I am flattered by my mention in your poem.
Thank you for the peek into the garden, and
for scratching my name there...peace...

[breathtest]

Thanks for recognising my poem as an inspiration for this!

And i am so glad that it helped you write this, tailor STATELY, beacause i really like it.

'oblivious / to the susurrus / of the city / beyond my gate' is my favourite line because i am infinitely interested in the change between the chaotic city and the peace of nature. And this poem really does get across the beauty and peaceful quality of nature.

I also love the attention to minor details which are so awe inspiring when you just watch animals and bugs in the wild.

Good job, i love it, thanks for posting!

[tailor STATELY]

breathtest and hack...

Thank you ! for the inspiration and your kind comments.

[MorpheusSandman]

I quite love this; there's a simplicity and serenity to it. I'm not sure I get all of it, but sometimes I can appreciate poetry just from an aesthetic perspective. I also think this is one of the few pieces I've read on here where I loved the short-line form.

[dizzydoll]

A garden variety who are more important than our silly lives allow us to think about. As with all poems of nature, I love it. :coolgleamA:

[tailor STATELY]

MorpheusSandman & dizzydoll - thank you