'Cuddle' spray to make men more loveable.

[Emil Miller]

I'm not sure that this belongs on the serious discussion forum as I am still laughing about it. However, for what it's worth, here is the preamble to an item in today's Daily Express;

It's just what women have been waiting for - a spray that makes men more sensitive.
Scientists say that the nasal spray is capable of turning the most macho of hunks into a dewy-eyed baby-kisser who says all the right things and stops going down the pub.
The sensitivity spray uses oxytocin, known as the "cuddle hormone"

[Paulclem]

Some people do say 10 pints makes males dewy eyed, amongst other things.

[Emil Miller]

Some people do say 10 pints makes males dewy eyed, amongst other things.

Yes but if it stops them from going to the pub, it might be cheaper to buy the spray.

[Scheherazade]

Hey, which one is it? "Loveable" or "sensitive"?

"Sensitive" does not necessariy mean "loveable", you know.

[Emil Miller]

Hey, which one is it? "Loveable" or "sensitive"?

"Sensitive" does not necessariy mean "loveable", you know.

Well, according to the article, the boffins who have produced it are using the word sensitivity to describe its effect. The item was written by a Woman so presumably she is responsible for the headline.

[dizzydoll]

Its the next big thing... like Viagra was. I can just imagine what women are going to get up to with this spray. :coolgleamA:

Now this fun, and naughty and and and :brow:

Read all about it (http://www.express.co.uk/posts/view/172252/-Cuddle-spray-to-make-men-more-loveable-)

[Paulclem]

There does seem to be a bit of feminisation being done to men these days. Would there be an outcry if women were being enmaled - (sorry I couldn't think of a word so I made on up).

Isn't it better to have an ordinary bloke who develops a sensitive side rather than an emotion junky who squirts empathy when needed?

[Revolte]

does this mean the "Gay Bomb" is under work again? lol. Some of us don't need this to be lovable :ladysman:. lol

[*Classic*Charm*]

Oh come on! Everyone knows that deep down, men love cuddling! :ihih: I've never dated a man who didn't secretly love to cuddle.

[JuniperWoolf]

My initial response: :lol:

[Emil Miller]

There does seem to be a bit of feminisation being done to men these days.

Well it's fairly obvious that the media, forever looking for new avenues to exploit, are at the forefront, as usual, in conditioning the masses into believing that a concocted viewpoint is what they should be following.

[applepie]

I saw this on MSN as well. I think the whole thing is just a bit creepy to tell you the truth. Why do I want my "man" to be soft. I'm not the type who believes boys shouldn't cry, but weepy men make me uncomfortable. I think the overall encouragement/demand for men to be more feminine is really a bad thing. I even see in school that some teachers forget what real little boys are like (which mine is all boy :D), and it causes a perception of behavorial issues that are really nothing more than typical kid things.

[BienvenuJDC]

While a woman with some rugged outdoor characteristics is not bad, I surely wouldn't want a manly woman.

[Dodo25]

I read about this too, interestingly from another perspective though. It was 'to make women happier by making them love more'. And I think apart from being funny this is actually a very serious and interesting ethical issue here.

[dizzydoll]

I agree with Dodo. Unfortunately when I look at many older married [or live-in] couples they look bored, never speak to each other in restuarants and to look at the lines on their faces tells the story. I believe this is the next big thing and as another friend of mine said 'It had to be a woman who invented this.' I concur.

[ClaesGefvenberg]

Yes, I read it too, and found it less than amusing: Where would the real me go if I artificially change my personality? ...and what will be the next thing, I wonder? A spray to make women less sensitive, so they can stand it when their reformed men need to let their chemically induced feelings out?

Another thing: Where does this view that men do not show their feelings come from? In my not so humble opinion it is grossly inaccurate.

Give me a break: For the life of me I cannot understand this strange urge to change each other all the time. Besides, I think we are already stuffing ourself with quite enough chemicals as it is.

/Claes

[TheFifthElement]

Yes, I read it too, and found it less than amusing: Where would the real me go if I artificially change my personality? ...and what will be the next thing, I wonder? A spray to make women less sensitive, so they can stand it when their reformed men need to let their chemically induced feelings out?

Another thing: Where does this view that men do not show their feelings come from? In my not so humble opinion it is grossly inaccurate.

Give me a break: For the life of me I cannot understand this strange urge to change each other all the time. Besides, I think we are already stuffing ourself with quite enough chemicals as it is.

/Claes

It's a good point Claes. You could argue that there's little difference between this spray and something like, say, GHB, the so-called 'date rape' drug, which makes women more amenable to sexual advances. Would a man feel 'violated' if his partner, or some random passing woman, cuddle-sprayed him?

Fortunately my husband is already cuddly enough. No temptation here :)

[Revolte]

I wanna know if this is even healthy. I wasn't kidding about the gay bomb thing earlier either. To be honest I don't think this is a good thing at all. But at the same time, I won't complain if people stop being jerks for a while. Kinda wish it wouldn't take something like that though.

[dizzydoll]

hmmmm, I suppose that depends on what each of us classify as quality of life. I dont think it has anything to do with changing others, surely one would have to be a willing participant to use the spray. I was particularly impressed with this titbit of help [as per the report]:

He said it may prove valuable in the treatment of schizophrenia, which is often accompanied by an inability to connect with others. Previous research has found that oxytocin could be turned into a cure for shyness, as well as being used to treat autism, depression and anxiety.
source: http://www.express.co.uk/posts/view/172252/-Cuddle-spray-to-make-men-more-loveable-

anyhoo... you could be right about this:

Besides, I think we are already stuffing ourself with quite enough chemicals as it is.
/Claes

I am sure chemicals like Viagra cant be too much good either. lol.

:angel:

[Emil Miller]

[QUOTE=TheFifthElement;890002] Would a man feel 'violated' if his partner, or some random passing woman, cuddle-sprayed him? QUOTE]


That would depend on how nubile the random passing woman was.

[keilj]

So is the moral of the story here "Don't refrain from getting together with an insensitive jerk, just buy a spray that will make him less so"?

[Dodo25]

Yes, I read it too, and found it less than amusing: Where would the real me go if I artificially change my personality? ...and what will be the next thing, I wonder? A spray to make women less sensitive, so they can stand it when their reformed men need to let their chemically induced feelings out?

[...]

Give me a break: For the life of me I cannot understand this strange urge to change each other all the time. Besides, I think we are already stuffing ourself with quite enough chemicals as it is.



What is the 'real you' anyway? The 'self' is a construct of memes and genetically and environmentally determined brain wiring. We are all influenced by the environment, whether you call it 'artificially' or 'naturally' doesn't really make a difference. The good thing with the spray is you could actually 'choose' which direction you want to go.

And I don't think of it as 'changing' people. What's wrong with being happier? It's not 'real love' anymore? There's no such thing anyway, love is highly irrational and has had a biological purpose. What counts and makes it so strong is the feeling itself, not really the reasons (they're a delusion, altough a very strong and convincing one)!
I'm not saying that there are no reasons 'against' using the cuddle-spray (hilarious name). I'm kinda playing devil's advocate here, of course there are some problems too, and the stuff would be very dangerous if applied badly - as it tends to be with science. Just wanted to throw some thoughts out there to give another point of view.

[dizzydoll]

It's not 'real love' anymore?

I guess I am a romantic and therefore I would simply die of a broken heart... if I believed there was no 'real love' anymore. http://forum.thescubasite.com/japanese/jap3.gif (http://www.thescubasite.com)

[applepie]

Another thing: Where does this view that men do not show their feelings come from? In my not so humble opinion it is grossly inaccurate.

Give me a break: For the life of me I cannot understand this strange urge to change each other all the time. Besides, I think we are already stuffing ourself with quite enough chemicals as it is.

/Claes

I'm afraid that my husband might choose to "cuddle-spray" me since I'm the one who isn't good about sharing feelings;) I don't know where the idea that it is a guy thing came from, but I'm worse than any of the men I know about not talking about things.

I think the overall idea is just appalling. Some things just are, and I don't understand the desire of everyone to fix them. Anything that is designed to alter your body's normal processes can not be good for you. Yes, this means that some people will be depressed, some will be unhappy, and some will live out their lives in a perpetual state of bliss. For most of us, it means that we will have the normal ups and downs that people should have. What is really wrong with that????

[Emil Miller]

While a woman with some rugged outdoor characteristics is not bad, I surely wouldn't want a manly woman.


I know what you mean.


http://www.michelemaroldo.com/gallery/large/Michele_Maroldo_0012.jpg

[Petrarch's Love]

Well, I don't know what this drug is, but thinking of any drug as some sort of personality changer on this simple level is a silly and potentially an irresponsible attitude. Regardless of how one feels about turning a man into a more feminine type, that's not actually what is going to happen. Cutesy though it may be, I am sure the "cuddle" drug is a misleading title in the same way that calling Valium a "happiness" pill is. No, you cannot take Valium and just be a happy person, and yes, there are side effects with taking it and potential for serious addiction and other problems. It may sometimes be worth the risk in the case of people who have a severe mental/emotional imbalance such as clinical depression, when it can help counteract that imbalance and bring the person to a place where he/she can function more normally, but any such treatment would have to take the very real risks into account and balance them against the severity of the depression and the other treatment options. Perhaps, as someone mentioned above, this new drug could be useful for helping people who have issues with schizophrenia or anxiety disorders, and that would be a good thing. Using something to tinker with a personality you just don't like is not only silly, it's not going to work and it could have consequences that aren't worth risking when you don't have disabling mental or emotional problems. (The one thing I do wonder about is the claim that it makes a person have less of an urge to go down to the pub. If that just means it's taking down the energy levels of a perfectly happy guy who enjoys an evening pint or two with his mates and making him all weepy at home, then that clearly isn't a good idea, but if that's indicating that it's helping people with real alcoholic issues break an unhealthy dependency, then maybe it could be useful? It's hard to say to what's being indicated there and obviously one would need to know much more.)

More than the issue of whether men are being emasculated (and really, it sounds like this is an entirely voluntary thing. The comparison to the date rape drug, which does not just make women more amenable, but affects their muscles so that they are incapacitated and unable to resist is not an apt one.), I think the bigger issue here is what our attitude toward the use of drugs for "cosmetic" purposes is. This reminds me of an article I read not so long ago in The New Yorker which is now online:

http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2009/04/27/090427fa_fact_talbot

It talks about the use of so called neuroenhancing drugs, which in this article and elsewhere I've seen referred to as potentially being used as a type of "cosmetic neurology." The idea is that, just as people get cosmetic surgery to augment...whatever they want to augment, so they could use these drugs to augment their brains. I've heard and read about the idea elsewhere too, and I find it a deeply irresponsible way of talking about the use of mind altering substances. Indeed, I seem to remember that this article took an absurdly long time to get down to any extended discussion of the potential problems and side effects this kind of drug use could have for people. In brief, I get suspicious anytime I see a chemical being touted as a quick fix for anything, whether it's steroids for athletes, neuroenhancers for college kids, or this new "cuddle" drug to transform your Stanley Koslowski into Mr. Darcy. (And wouldn't it just be easier not to date Stan in the first place anyway?) While there can be positive uses for drugs that affect a person's mental and emotional state, the effects are never easy or cut and dry and the complexity of these potential effects need to be addressed with honesty.

[keilj]

something about the manipulative aspect of this - and folks wanting to manipulate someone who they are dearly close to - is very funny and fascinating to me

[dizzydoll]

I just think its just another gimmick, people love gimmicks and if nothing else I am sure it has provided many fun discussions around the world. People should lighten up and tell jokes about it instead of taking it so seriously. http://serve.mysmiley.net/animated/anim_44.gif (http://www.mysmiley.net)

[keilj]

I just think its just another gimmick, people love gimmicks and if nothing else I am sure it has provided many fun discussions around the world. People should lighten up and tell jokes about it instead of taking it so seriously. http://serve.mysmiley.net/animated/anim_44.gif (http://www.mysmiley.net)

oh it's definitely a gimmick - and capitalism at its best :patriot:

[Emil Miller]

In brief, I get suspicious anytime I see a chemical being touted as a quick fix for anything, whether it's steroids for athletes, neuroenhancers for college kids, or this new "cuddle" drug to transform your Stanley Koslowski into Mr. Darcy.

Well, perhaps it works after all.

http://images.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=http://www.photographersgallery.com/i/full/marlon_brando3.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.photographersgallery.com/photo.asp%3Fid%3D1897&usg=__-8RVSuQHd_in0naK9Y3xIWRyV80=&h=453&w=450&sz=110&hl=en&start=63&sig2=04FlT2YflFOrQ7t5lGoVDA&itbs=1&tbnid=fxLgCRqaRgPCgM:&tbnh=127&tbnw=126&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dmarlon%2Bbrando%2Bpictures%26start%3D 42%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN%26rlz%3D1T4HPEA_en-GBGB376GB376%26ndsp%3D21%26tbs%3Disch:1&ei=b_XiS5DuIYyPOM7IkOUN

[Helga]

I don't know if it's me being unromantic or the men around me to sensitive but I wouldn't dream of using something like this and I do not like to cuddle.

[dizzydoll]

Marriage changes passion.
Suddenly you're in bed
with a relative.

http://people.bu.edu/wwildman/WeirdWildWeb/media/images/other/jokes_1.jpg

[dafydd manton]

Oh, I love a manly man, and a womanly woman, but I hate a boily boy. If some geezer wants to make himslef cuddly, frankly, all he needs is a large bank account and a tin of cheap deodorant. Eau de Cash.