Linked Part IIII

[Leera]

An ocean of tears, a sea of grief.
Shattered links, faded love.
No longer united, torn by hate.
No longer one, ripped by sorrow.
Ripped away, torn apart.
Love and hate, hand in hand.
Sorrow and happiness, eye for eye.
Trapped by hate, chained by ancient love.
Holding on, slipping away.
Ice and heat, raging streams.
Cold and fire, whirling pools.
Flashes of love, all that remains.
Joy of her life, lost in darkness.
Drowned in a sea of hate, overcome by lakes of loathing.
Hope evaporated, purpose faded.

[Bar22do]

What a storm of emotions! hopefully cathartic! but the purpose does remain - "flashes of love" remain as you write - at a more distant horizon you might notice a beam of sun.... (and even a tragic love is worthwhile living, isn't it? be it for the sake of our creative material...)

[MorpheusSandman]

It definitely does feel like a cathartic piece. I might suggest that the repetition of short statements separated by commas loses its power when it's used so consistently in a piece.

[cogs]

yes, emotional, but what was ripped and torn; more subjects would help us to relate to your pain.

[Buh4Bee]

It's too raw and I'm actually going to say this, but would benefit from better structure. Even some rhyme, would give it a boast.