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MaryJanesCircle
12-28-2009, 06:42 PM
This is a song, so the meter changes obviously. I am not going to promote the song, and it's not what this post is meant for, but if anyone is curious to hear, you can message me.

---

I knew I couldn't keep my cool;
who was I really trying to fool?
It breaks my heart that I acted so cruel;
my words were my armour; you're beautiful.

No, you didn't deserve any of this;
I told you I was a kid, now you know what I meant.
That's how it's been for as long as I've lived;
And I'm afraid that's how it'll remain until the end.

I just want you to know:
I gotta let you go;
for the longer I stay, the more you'll see my pain and heartache.
That's how it's always been;
why did I expect this time would turn out any different?

It was all of my insecurities;
it was nothing you did-no, it was totally me.
I wish that none of this would've come to be;
my dreams turned into nightmares in just one week.

I held your hand 'cause that type of touch
made me believe I was holding your love.
I acted stupid and in a rush,
But I was scared that tomorrow may never come.

And it hurts me to think,
I treated you this way,
when all I wanted to do was to show that I cared about you.
And as bad as this may sound,
I wouldn't change anything,
it would happen eventually.

I never thought I would make you cry;
seeing your tears really killed me inside.
For I know I'm the reason why
you're having to tell me goodbye.

PrinceMyshkin
12-29-2009, 01:05 PM
I would change "But I was scared that tomorrow may never come" to "But I was scared that tomorrow might never come" (without the bold emphasis). Otherwise this sounds like it would make a good song!

MaryJanesCircle
12-29-2009, 06:11 PM
I didn't even notice that. Does "might" fit the past tense?

I was scared that tomorrow might never come.

as opposed to

I am scared that tomorrow may never come.

If this is what you are getting at, then yes I understand; and thanks for the tips!