Log in

View Full Version : The Cookbook of Man



Delta40
11-20-2009, 05:58 AM
I read a recipe of Man
once with foolish heart
like a cheap harlequin tale
his musky scent brought me to my knees
as a magpie cawed
at the tension between us
His solid masculine chest
my heaving shapely breast
against his tight seam
I yearned to be pressed

A deep husky voice snaps
'where the hell is my tea?'
Illusive thoughts dreamy
become wilted,soggy, dreary
I clutch the saucepan tight
and clang the stainless steel
against the distant hope
of a colander strained love meal

So reads The cookbook of Man in real life
The kitchen steam masks my sad tears
for lost passion heat - cruel aging fears
Truth is the loveliest thing I know
tonight's tea - corn cobs and sweet potato

inbetween
11-21-2009, 02:47 PM
hm... that realy got something.. can't define it yet ... perhaps later but it got something

Virgil
11-21-2009, 03:51 PM
I think it's quite good Delta. I definitely enjoyed it. The second stanza doesn't quite seem as smooth as the first. On further consideration, that second stanza comes across as too black and white (or should I say two dimensional) and doesn't quite capture a the same three dimensionality of the first. If you know what i mean. But I do think overall it's quite good.

Delta40
11-21-2009, 05:39 PM
lol. Yes you're right. Perhaps that is what happened to her view of love - it became two dimensional.....

Virgil
11-21-2009, 06:22 PM
lol. Yes you're right. Perhaps that is what happened to her view of love - it became two dimensional.....

:lol: :lol: That does happen, doesn't it.

DanielBenoit
11-22-2009, 04:12 AM
Great and smooth rhyming in the first stanza. And though, as Virgil said, the second didn't flow as well I very muched liked the images of clutchinng the saucepan.

Pendragon
11-22-2009, 08:27 AM
like a cheap harlequin tale


Quite a captivating image here!

cogs
11-23-2009, 11:51 PM
i like the contrast. maybe after he eats, he'll be more agreeable.