Neonatus

[Bakiryu]

This feeling
Like a growth on my stomach
A cancer I suckle
A bleeding wound made of reds and yellows

Something other
This parasite
I hold and protect, I’m its catalyst
Who knows what

I unleash on the unsuspecting world?
When all is said and done
And the caul falls away
Reveals the monster

Perfectly pink and freckled
Black haired and hungry, hungry, hungry
Ruled not by moons but by the beat of its heart
And that savage tearing instinct

As it coos and caws
And I can’t help but want it
To emerge and become
Mine, my own, my flesh and blood

It was nothing, I lie
Now that all is overcome
And the membranes are cleared away
And the thing is satisfied.



(I promise I'll stop posting so much of my stuff XD)

[DanielBenoit]

Quite good, though the images don't seem to live up to the rhythm like in some of your other poems.

And btw, DON'T you dare stop posting poems on here! :p

[Bakiryu]

XD, thanks, what do you mean? I mean, if you wouldn't mind elaborating.


:) I post too much of my stuff lol.

[DanielBenoit]

Well, the imagery didn't grab me as much as some of your other poems. But the rhythm is phenomenal and surpasses everything else in the poem.

[Scheherazade]

Does this mean what I think it means? Or am I reading too much into it?

[blazeofglory]

The striking images and rhythms are what moved me after reading the poem

[Bakiryu]

Does this mean what I think it means? Or am I reading too much into it?

I don't know. What do you think it means?

[firefangled]

I second DB's request for you to continue posting without reservation.

The images in this for me were raw and original. I thought you paced the poem very well giving up a little at a time.

I was reminded of some of Plath and Sexton's poems about the same.

[Bakiryu]

Thank you all for you wonderful comments :banana: :)