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jurisprudent
11-12-2009, 04:53 AM
When I look back
Maybe not in anger
Maybe just to see
What had been there
And what I find
What I occasionally see –
The circling sharks
The sinking and rising water
The waves coming on and on
And my hand extended
Searching
Waiting for a hand
In that whirlwind
It was hard to stay solid
To stay as stable as I would have liked to
And I needed so much
I had never wanted that so much before
Battering waves, crying seagulls, sharks
And flesh that wanted to transpire, transcend and end
But all went down to the bottom
The sandy bottom under the waters of this past
And when I looked from there up to the surface of the sea
The light was so weak and weak again
So pale
As if there was no day above the waves
But only night
And perhaps I passed away.
But now
Past that feeling of responsibility
After the tides are gone
(But they might come again, I wish to say)
My hand, the extended one, is sickened by leprosy,
Maybe gone at all
And I can sit here on the bottom under the waves
As immunity might have already
been built up against the nightmares
And just as I shake my head
And shrug my shoulders
This flesh has been weak and still stays that weak
But is covered by the dust of time
Time damn time
And I still will be responsible
But I would not wish
I would not desire
I would not hope
I would not believe
That a hand will meet my leper hand
In absolute correlation.
God bless the unbelievers.

Sampson
11-12-2009, 03:35 PM
This poem really moved me. It has a sense of purity to it... I really like it (:

Buh4Bee
11-13-2009, 07:46 AM
I started to read the Oscar Wilde essay. I'd like to comment once I finish it. Sorrow is a powerful theme to me.
I conncted to this line:
And flesh that wanted to transpire, transcend and end

But these lines made the poem for me:
To stay as stable as I would have liked to
And I needed so much
I had never wanted that so much before
Battering waves, crying seagulls, sharks
And flesh that wanted to transpire, transcend and end

I believe there is much, much more to your poem and as I said I'll read the essay and find out myself.

Pendragon
11-13-2009, 08:39 AM
The sinking and rising water
The waves coming on and on
And my hand extended
Searching
Waiting for a hand
In that whirlwind
It was hard to stay solid



Man, aren't we all struggling for that helping hand in the troubled malestorm of life!

jurisprudent
11-13-2009, 01:52 PM
The poem bears no relation to Oscar Wilde's essay. The title is taken from the Bible.

Buh4Bee
11-13-2009, 01:55 PM
Then I can move on!! Thanks.

blazeofglory
11-13-2009, 10:51 PM
Spiritually appealing!! It sublimated my mind

Buh4Bee
11-14-2009, 07:22 AM
I agree Blaze. Is there any desire for redemption in this piece?

jurisprudent
11-14-2009, 07:35 AM
I would say salvation, but the right time is gone, so now it does not matter anymore. What is left is a kind of static feeling of numb superiority and revelation derived from experience.

PrinceMyshkin
11-14-2009, 08:23 AM
Rivetting enough up to the last lines



But I would not wish
I would not desire
I would not hope
I would not believe
That a hand will meet my leper hand
In absolute correlation.
God bless the unbelievers.

but it becomes truly despondent there, and that last line is a provocative mystery - and a majestic conclusion!

~Sophia~
11-14-2009, 05:14 PM
I was captivated throughout. That being said, I think the poem would not loose any of its power if you edited out the line in brackets. It felt awkward and tongue trippy. Still a wonderful read though!