Perhaps the Odd Angel

[DanBierce]

All I own would not fill a crate, and my gut
holds neither god nor demon
since the boarding-up of my faith's poor shack.
The demagnetization of the compass my father
left behind as he sailed away on his warship
has nixed my direction. All roads are forked;
lead to air, water, and dirt dead ends.

I cannot worship the trees or rocks or hills
since I've witnessed them being wrecked
and thieved by master hoarders and poets
who speak of silent seas. The sea is never silent
except to those who dwell inland from its smash
and hiss. I'm weary of liars and the love piled
on their images by household sages.

If I could find a timer I would set it. Let its
tick torment those who never want to leave
this year or the next to someone else. The ding
would smack of finality and smooth-faced tombstones
stacked for the engraver's eye and hand. The spark
behind his spectacles, kept bright by his muse,
would blind the naive angel who would try to intervene.

[MorpheusSandman]

I'm quite mystified by this one! It's so mysterious and intriguing I'm a bit bereft of my usual critical lexicon. I guess I could simply say that I quite like it but I don't feel as if I have a grip on its theme.

[Pendragon]

That first stanza really hits home, I've questioned my own Faith at times, wondering about the whens, the wheres, and the whys...

[cogs]

i finally got it, i think. the last stanza was tough. this must have taken much thinking. with writing in sentences, you have 'the's' and 'i's'. a suggestion is to fit the other words into a whole that supports itself, as in meter, rhyme, etc. but the framework is definitely there. i do like the flow, and especially, "smooth-faced tombstones stacked for the engraver's eye and hand." (i continued mentally with the stone ten commandments, and how angry paul broke them, when he witnessed idolatry)

[blazeofglory]

Bedecked with mystical elements, and of course a little indecipherable at first as some ideas are implicit in the poem and that are exactly what are essential in the making of a good poem

[PrinceMyshkin]

Overall, the ultimate expression of nihilist despair, but these lines:


The sea is never silent
except to those who dwell inland from its smash
and hiss.

hit home with especial beauty and force.

[DanBierce]

Thanks, guys. Glad the poem works well for you for the most part. I shy away from explaining my poems. If readers don't 'get' them it's my duty to look at ways to make the poem read clearer.

"A poem that can be improved by its author's explanations never should have been published in the first place." Archibald MacLeish