JacobF
06-19-2009, 06:20 PM
In my short stories the characters often flashback to events in their lives which I use to reveal character and give some context to the plot. However, just re-reading my story "Chimney" (which is on the short story board in case anyone is curious) the transitions between flashbacks and present events seem stilted and jarring, and I can't seem to find a way to ease the flow between the two.
I'll give an example from the story I mentioned:
"Mary watched her mother pull the handle, the door barely opening. Watching each attempt delivered pangs of nausea into Mary’s stomach. It was more painful than just cramps, Mary knew, as she placed a plump hand on her own belly. Mary couldn’t describe what the pain was, because she couldn’t discern where it came from or where it was going. The first time the pain came was at one o’clock on that rainy night when she picked up the phone and was greeted by her mother’s grim voice. Her mother confirmed her decision and it was to be carried out the next week. Mary covered her rosy face with kleenex the entire night, the sobs barely seeping through so her husband would go back to sleep and not hear her."
And there are many other situations like this where the flashbacks just don't feel right. Are there any methods for transitioning between past and present which are subtler than just throwing the information out there as I have? And a more loaded question: how do writers generally deal with flashbacks? Thanks in advance for any tips or comments.
I'll give an example from the story I mentioned:
"Mary watched her mother pull the handle, the door barely opening. Watching each attempt delivered pangs of nausea into Mary’s stomach. It was more painful than just cramps, Mary knew, as she placed a plump hand on her own belly. Mary couldn’t describe what the pain was, because she couldn’t discern where it came from or where it was going. The first time the pain came was at one o’clock on that rainy night when she picked up the phone and was greeted by her mother’s grim voice. Her mother confirmed her decision and it was to be carried out the next week. Mary covered her rosy face with kleenex the entire night, the sobs barely seeping through so her husband would go back to sleep and not hear her."
And there are many other situations like this where the flashbacks just don't feel right. Are there any methods for transitioning between past and present which are subtler than just throwing the information out there as I have? And a more loaded question: how do writers generally deal with flashbacks? Thanks in advance for any tips or comments.