A kingdom

[Helga]

I was watching two of them and they are so beautiful.

So much dignity
so much grace.
A thief of hearts
and golden gems.
A head held high
he releases a sigh.
Takes care of his kin,
but no other is safe
from his grin.
He is out in the cold,
in the wind,in the snow.
He fights every element
of nature, and wins.
Mysterious, respectful,
only he possesses this.
Betrayal is not in his nature.
His feathers so dark,
and hard, and strong.
He's the raven
the mightiest of birds.

[Koa]

I like this line a lot for the sound


A head held high

But I don't like the ending too much, i find it sort of too plain, not surprising and not even fitting to well with the rhythm...and if you allow me some more criticism, I think there is too much effort in making it rhyme...I said often that I'm not a big fan of rhymes at any cost and in this case for me it would work better with a less rhyming rhythm... Not bad anyway, don't be too bothered by my unmighty opinion :)

[amuse]

i like your subject matter, Helga.

[mono]

Well done, Helga.
The poem maintains a steady rhythm - do you, by chance, count syllables for lines? Or, only by coincidence, do most of the lines match, or nearly match? Something difficult for MANY rhyming poets proves to sound not intentionally and desperately rhyming; you demonstrate a respectable rhyme, somewhat inconsistent, which I like, reminiscent of Emily Dickinson.
The title I felt a little skeptical about, as I wonder if the subject of the poem necessarily applies to more of the crow's kingdom, or its will in essence. Very nice, otherwise - a true poet can soak the inspiration out of any subject.
My favorite lines:

So much dignity
so much grace.

He is out in the cold,
in the wind,in the snow.
He fights every element
of nature, and wins.
Mysterious, respectful,
only he possesses this.

His feathers so dark,
and hard, and strong.
He's the raven
the mightiest of birds.

[Helga]

I don't know how to rhyme it just comes when I start writing, the ending though is not very good I agree, that was the only part I was 'contious' while writing.

[Koa]

btw i hadnt noticed the title... intriguing :)

[SwiftSleigh7]

Takes care of his kin,
but no other is safe
from his grin.
...the raven
the mightiest of birds.


Austere and yet suffused with a daunting force of macabre malevolence.

A strong piece of imagery.