Should I leave job?????

[mukta581]

Should I leave job?????
I know its sounds so crazy and frenzied, but really I am so confused my words are languish, I am facing so many problem at my office due to all those rubbish things I am getting languid in my life, getting lots of frustration. some of people in my office they are doing brutish behaviour with me, they are haughty kind of person, they are creating problem for me, they are saying to me you should leave job and really I know if I will not leave this job they will create problem for me, its my first job after my study, I don’t want spoil my future, I don’t know what to do now so confused please help me out give me suggestion what to do?? Rally I am very confused about my future,its clogging my vision, I know if I will leave job I will face financial problem,
Should I accept all those thing?????
Should I leave job???
Regards
Mukta

[loe]

Sounds like mobbing.
Can't you discuss your problem with your boss or so?

In my opinion just leaving without a "fight" would make it too easy for those people.
But in the end no one can tell you what to do - it's your decision and you have to live with it.

Good luck and best wishes

[Sapphire]

I think Loe has a point here, as the way you describe it makes it sound like mobbing to me too. It is easy to say from this position "stand up for yourself" - I really hope you can discuss this with somebody higher in command within the firm.

I guess you're in a situation where you really do not like being in the office anymore. However, do you like the job in itself? I do not know how much your job involves your coworkers - do you have to work together or are you just in the same department? Is it "only" the situation which makes you want to leave?

Maybe you could look around for an other job (while keeping this one for financial security)? If you would find something good (I know, it's a chance of 1 in a 1000) you could just leave that office and let them rot in it :p. But I get that is a long shot, as a day has only so many hours and most of those you'll be working.

It might be an idea to sit down calmly and write down in clear words how you see the future if you stay here, and how you see it if you would leave. Put down the positive against the negative and try to find a solution you can stand behind and face another day with.

Good luck with this tough decision.

[mukta581]

thanks for ur respond loe&sapphire, u said well i have to take self decision.

[Madhuri]

If you can tell us what eactly is going on there...maybe we can help you find a way at your current job.

But leaving a job, knowing that you will have financial trouble is not advisable (also considering the current job scenario). You can search for a new job in the meantime, and leave once you have found a better option.

But, if you know you are right, then don't just give up without a fight. Try all options before taking the decision to quit.

[papayahed]

What exactly are your coworkers doing? Is it all you coworkers or just a few? How long have you worked there? Is this your first job?

[mukta581]

What exactly are your coworkers doing? Is it all you coworkers or just a few? How long have you worked there? Is this your first job?

yes, its my first job before 8 month I have completed M.B.A.

[papayahed]

I don't know if this is the case but sometimes when people graduate and get their first real job it is hard to adjust.

What kind of things are your coworkers doing to you? examples will help.

[Madhuri]

Papaya is right...

Sometimes for a fresher even a tiny problem looks big, because they are experiencing real work environment for the first time and don't know how to solve problems.

Mukta, if you can tell us what's going on....it would help... otherwise we would be making random guesses

[ClaesGefvenberg]

I am very confused about my future,its clogging my vision, I know if I will leave job I will face financial problemSorry to hear it, mukta. Unfortunately, this is not all that uncommon: Bullying is in no way limited to the school yard, and the sad truth is that rookies often have a hard time.


But leaving a job, knowing that you will have financial trouble is not advisable (also considering the current job scenario). You can search for a new job in the meantime, and leave once you have found a better option.Clearly good advice. That is what I would do.

In the mean time: If you are convinced that they are doing whatever it is they are doing on purpose, you should above everything else not let them see that they are getting to you. Appear chipper even if you are fuming inside, as it will make you feel better and perhaps even put the bullies off.

Believe me: I know it is tough... Best of luck.

/Claes

[mukta581]

Sorry to hear it, mukta. Unfortunately, this is not all that uncommon: Bullying is in no way limited to the school yard, and the sad truth is that rookies often have a hard time.

Clearly good advice. That is what I would do.

In the mean time: If you are convinced that they are doing whatever it is they are doing on purpose, you should above everything else not let them see that they are getting to you. Appear chipper even if you are fuming inside, as it will make you feel better and perhaps even put the bullies off.

Believe me: I know it is tough... Best of luck.

/Claes

Thank you for your kind advice;)

[NikolaiI]

It sounds like a difficult situation. I don't have any advice better than Claes, Madhuri, those who already posted. I think it's best to look for another job while continuing there, and do your best to help improve the situation. I don't know what it is like at work for you now, but I wish you all the strength and faith needed to make things better. I wish you may have faith and never give up hope. Please stay safe!

[Don Quixote Jr]

MUKTA

I know how you feel (to some extent at least) BUT...
I really think you need to talk this over with people who know you personally!
If there is no one you can or will talk to about your problem in person you might consider discussing it with a family doctor or with a pyschologist (if you can afford one). Or you could try finding a local support group of some sort, although I guess that gets back to seeking advice from strangers...
Anyways, good luck in resolving this situation!

[NikolaiI]

Mukta, if you could tell us a little more about the situation.. I don't know. All I can say is to always think of Lord Krishna, and all will turn out fine. The future is brighter than we can know. :) Or Hanuman-ji. It is also as good. There's two things I am thinking of.. one I heard, someone say, "If you think of someone as a friend, they will become your friend. If you think of someone as your enemy, they will become your enemy." Yet I know it can be challenging at work. I had some problems at work a little while ago, I didn't tell anyone really, but they have gone away. At some point I thought it was very difficult, but fortunately the environment became better.

The other thing I was thinking of is, something The Mother, whom I greatly admire, said, which was this. "If you are completely in the divine consciousness, one can't be hurt, even physically." Now I am looking this up, and there is much more part of it. I think you have not heard of The Mother or Sri Aurobindo. Knowing and reading them helped me so much. Even though it was difficult. We do need more details though. But always take shelter of Krishna, of Hanuman-ji... there is a saying, "Always remember Krishna, and never forget (Him)." :)

My advice is, these people work with intimidation, as it seems. Don't be intimidated, and focus on your work, and... also look for another job if you can, it might be a very good idea. But... don't be intimidated and also try with all your strength for peace...

The Mother also said some things about this, some things about the power of immobility. Ha, not like inactive immobility but one in stillness and strength... so if you can be peaceful and kind, hopefully that will work on others.

I can't really... describe in words, though... take shelter in Hanuman-ji, and also try to work for solutions... you are very intelligent, and very strong; and those who try to say otherwise are not doing anything great with their lives. Try not to be influenced; take influence from your heart, and your friends, and your well-wishers here. :)

Take care! Talk to you soon.

I needed to edit this to say just that, while I said work for peace, I don't mean that their behavior is acceptable. It needs to change. I have had a little experience in things like this, actually perhaps more than a little. My advice is to do your best to be your best; what is difficult is doing it in the association of envious persons or those who try for intimidation. This is really important. What they are doing is not good.. I don't know more about it:( but, sometimes, or always, simply reacting to those who act like this can be not good, because you are sort of letting them make you react. Sometimes it is good to confront people, it is probably also good to find some who are sympathetic. In my situation things got better and I am friends with every person at my work. It may be more people who you are involved with work. And you may not wish to be friends with that person. I can understand if this is the case. When I was having difficulty I was not wanting to be friends with that person at all. And it may be different for you still. I really do not know because I do not know more of the character of the person (and others) who are involved in this. I really, really, wish things will get better quickly! You have all my support - and quite evidently others who wish you well here as well. So again, find peace and strength, have faith. ;);)

Also, those that are doing those things, keep in mind they are acting very badly. If at all possible, do NOT let them influence you or your thoughts... your true nature is a divine soul, and they are acting in the grossest of ignorance. :( Keep safe, and well, and peaceful and blissful. Take care.

Bhagavad-Gita 16:1-3 Fearlessness; purification of one's existence; cultivation of spiritual knowledge; charity; self-control; performance of sacrifice; study of the Vedas; austerity; simplicity; nonviolence; truthfulness; freedom from anger; renunciation; tranquillity; aversion to faultfinding; compassion for all living entities; freedom from covetousness; gentleness; modesty; steady determination; vigor; forgiveness; fortitude; cleanliness; and freedom from envy and from the passion for honor — these transcendental qualities, O son of Bharata, belong to godly men endowed with divine nature.

[mukta581]

Mukta, if you could tell us a little more about the situation.. I don't know. All I can say is to always think of Lord Krishna, and all will turn out fine. The future is brighter than we can know. :) Or Hanuman-ji. It is also as good. There's two things I am thinking of.. one I heard, someone say, "If you think of someone as a friend, they will become your friend. If you think of someone as your enemy, they will become your enemy." Yet I know it can be challenging at work. I had some problems at work a little while ago, I didn't tell anyone really, but they have gone away. At some point I thought it was very difficult, but fortunately the environment became better.

The other thing I was thinking of is, something The Mother, whom I greatly admire, said, which was this. "If you are completely in the divine consciousness, one can't be hurt, even physically." Now I am looking this up, and there is much more part of it. I think you have not heard of The Mother or Sri Aurobindo. Knowing and reading them helped me so much. Even though it was difficult. We do need more details though. But always take shelter of Krishna, of Hanuman-ji... there is a saying, "Always remember Krishna, and never forget (Him)." :)

My advice is, these people work with intimidation, as it seems. Don't be intimidated, and focus on your work, and... also look for another job if you can, it might be a very good idea. But... don't be intimidated and also try with all your strength for peace...

The Mother also said some things about this, some things about the power of immobility. Ha, not like inactive immobility but one in stillness and strength... so if you can be peaceful and kind, hopefully that will work on others.

I can't really... describe in words, though... take shelter in Hanuman-ji, and also try to work for solutions... you are very intelligent, and very strong; and those who try to say otherwise are not doing anything great with their lives. Try not to be influenced; take influence from your heart, and your friends, and your well-wishers here. :)

Take care! Talk to you soon.

I needed to edit this to say just that, while I said work for peace, I don't mean that their behavior is acceptable. It needs to change. I have had a little experience in things like this, actually perhaps more than a little. My advice is to do your best to be your best; what is difficult is doing it in the association of envious persons or those who try for intimidation. This is really important. What they are doing is not good.. I don't know more about it:( but, sometimes, or always, simply reacting to those who act like this can be not good, because you are sort of letting them make you react. Sometimes it is good to confront people, it is probably also good to find some who are sympathetic. In my situation things got better and I am friends with every person at my work. It may be more people who you are involved with work. And you may not wish to be friends with that person. I can understand if this is the case. When I was having difficulty I was not wanting to be friends with that person at all. And it may be different for you still. I really do not know because I do not know more of the character of the person (and others) who are involved in this. I really, really, wish things will get better quickly! You have all my support - and quite evidently others who wish you well here as well. So again, find peace and strength, have faith. ;);)

Also, those that are doing those things, keep in mind they are acting very badly. If at all possible, do NOT let them influence you or your thoughts... your true nature is a divine soul, and they are acting in the grossest of ignorance. :( Keep safe, and well, and peaceful and blissful. Take care.

Bhagavad-Gita 16:1-3 Fearlessness; purification of one's existence; cultivation of spiritual knowledge; charity; self-control; performance of sacrifice; study of the Vedas; austerity; simplicity; nonviolence; truthfulness; freedom from anger; renunciation; tranquillity; aversion to faultfinding; compassion for all living entities; freedom from covetousness; gentleness; modesty; steady determination; vigor; forgiveness; fortitude; cleanliness; and freedom from envy and from the passion for honor — these transcendental qualities, O son of Bharata, belong to godly men endowed with divine nature.

Thank you Nik!!!!;)

[byquist]

1) Try to find one thing that you find to be worthwhile about your job, and appreciate it. Over and over, be glad about that one thing.

2) Look in the mirror in the morning and form a smile. Get the physical feel of what a smile is like on your face. Then periodically smile during the day (say, once every hour).

3) Start developing a sense of humor by watching comedy movies.

4) Be glad that you get a paycheck. Something like 4-5 million people don't see these any more in the US.

5) Plan for the future while you are "putting up" with the present.

6) Write down the lessons that you are learning each day in this job.

7) Stick around the folks that you consider to be friends. See Steven Covey (Seven Habits of Highly Successful People) about your "circle of influence."

8) Make up a "secret" in the morning that nobody at work knows (let's say, "I want to surf in Hawaii."). During the day, when people are unkind, start thinking about that secret. Thus, you detatch yourself from meanness of others. In awhile, they will direct their mean thoughts towards somebody else or something else.

9) Love others. Even if they treat you like dirt, love them. #9 might be the most important recommendation here, and give you the quickest solution to your issue.

[librarius_qui]

Should I leave job?????

You should take advice from someone in your own country. Different cultures and cultural details might make a crucial difference, and you might find reasons to leave that might not be damaging to your career.

Which is what should be the main concern, I think.

Secondly: do you love what you're working with? This too might be a source of tought.

But the first advice is the most important.

Lq~