Ah, dear soul,

[PrinceMyshkin]

Ah, dear soul,
your indifference to me
clamours against my needy heart.

I imagine you pitting
the whole of your ingenuity,
your formidable will,
to devise new stratagems
for ignoring me.

I create myself
in the face of your neglect of me.
It empowers me, the less
I have of you, the more
I expand to fill the space between us.

What is more alluring
than the merest flash
of a creamy, cold shoulder?

[Sapphire]

It is sad, but in the same way it is strangely strong. Or maybe that is not the right word: the fact that the "I-person" uses the ignoring to create him/herself makes it necessary for his/her existence.
I am sorry, I am not as good with words as you clearly are. Lets try again to make my point: this poem makes me wonder what would happen to the "I-person" when the "soul" would start to care. It seems like the "I-person" might not be able to grasp that idea, having made such a dreamworld him/herself around the ignoring.

I am intrigued by the "creamy, cold shoulder" part: I still try to imagine how creamy and cold go together. I guess like icecream :) But somehow creamy connects with hotness in my head :confused: I really wonder how such a shoulder would feel... if it is like icecream it would probably melt...

Is the soul supposed to be some one elses, or are the soul and the heart in the same body? Untill the last verse I thought they might be in the same body, but in that case it would rather be a rib than a shoulder - though I do not know where the soul is located in bodies...

Did I already mention I like it? :) It definitely makes me think ;)

[PrinceMyshkin]

It is sad, but in the same way it is strangely strong. Or maybe that is not the right word: the fact that the "I-person" uses the ignoring to create him/herself makes it necessary for his/her existence.
I am sorry, I am not as good with words as you clearly are. Lets try again to make my point: this poem makes me wonder what would happen to the "I-person" when the "soul" would start to care. It seems like the "I-person" might not be able to grasp that idea, having made such a dreamworld him/herself around the ignoring.

I am intrigued by the "creamy, cold shoulder" part: I still try to imagine how creamy and cold go together. I guess like icecream :) But somehow creamy connects with hotness in my head :confused: I really wonder how such a shoulder would feel... if it is like icecream it would probably melt...

Is the soul supposed to be some one elses, or are the soul and the heart in the same body? Untill the last verse I thought they might be in the same body, but in that case it would rather be a rib than a shoulder - though I do not know where the soul is located in bodies...

Did I already mention I like it? :) It definitely makes me think ;)

The main thing I want to say in reply is that you ought not to apologize for not being good with words. So far, in those of your posts that I have read, you either have interesting things to say or you ask questions that are worth considering.

Having said the latter, I don't propose to go into the back story of this poem other than to say re the conflict you see in the "creamy, cold shoulder" that the opposition is in the eye of the persona narrating the poem, that at one time he felt a degree of sexual attraction to the woman of whom he speaks and believed - or imagined - the possibility of romance between them and convinced himself that it was mutual.

[qimissung]

Boy you captured it all with that last stanza..."What is more alluring than the flash of a creamy, cold shoulder?" I love how you merged two ideas into one to create this idea of one who is alluring and repulsing at the same time.

I also like how you touched on the idea of neediness-haven't we all wanted, at one time or another, someone who didn't want us?

[PrinceMyshkin]

Boy you captured it all with that last stanza..."What is more alluring than the flash of a creamy, cold shoulder?" I love how you merged two ideas into one to create this idea of one who is alluring and repulsing at the same time.

I also like how you touched on the idea of neediness-haven't we all wanted, at one time or another, someone who didn't want us?

Thanks, q., that one was somewhat difficult to write, a bit risky is how it felt to me.

[mmaria]

As for "creamy shoulder", to me it appears to be rather erotic and it gives the whole poem more terrestrial, more material substance, as an opposition to the soul evocation, which is, as we suppose, not a material thing.

[Virgil]

As for "creamy shoulder", to me it appears to be rather erotic and it gives the whole poem more terrestrial, more material substance, as an opposition to the soul evocation, which is, as we suppose, not a material thing.

I agree. It made the poem open its vision out. Another good piece Prince. :)

[Silas Thorne]

I loved these lines most of all:

the less
I have of you, the more
I expand to fill the space between us.

What is more alluring
than the merest flash
of a creamy, cold shoulder?

I don't know why, but I suddenly had a flash in my head of lines from the song 'Build me up Buttercup' sung by The Foundations after I read this poem. The poem is different, but the one-sidedness feels related. Thank you for the poem. I have felt this before, or at least what I understand from the poem.

[skib]

This touched me, Prince. Whether or not this is a reflection of an experience you have had, this speaks clearly to me with a situation I have had (and am still having) trouble in dealing with. I find it oddly humorous that your poem took me twenty seconds to read and explained my problem more wholly to me than my months of contemplation. Thank you.

[a_little_wisp]

I create myself
in the face of your neglect of me.
It empowers me, the less
I have of you, the more
I expand to fill the space between us.

This hits home - I mean, minus the creamy shoulder part (more like a broad shoulder, for me I guess?). I'm cursed with being the 'little sister' figure to many of the guys I've always liked. And I've learned, over the years, to simply fill the gap with more, more of me - so much so that I've become very independent, and nervous of guys.

Again, with so many of your poems, it's not that it's wildly eloquent (though it is, certainly, eloquent) - it's the utter simplicity, the utter truthfulness - how you say so much in so few words - that makes your work absolutely brilliant. Prince, you're awesome.

[ampoule]

the less
I have of you, the more
I expand to fill the space between us.



oh my gosh! what a great line! it is soooooo true! 'yer' so smart! ;):D
you really are and I like your poem.

[PrinceMyshkin]

This touched me, Prince. Whether or not this is a reflection of an experience you have had, this speaks clearly to me with a situation I have had (and am still having) trouble in dealing with. I find it oddly humorous that your poem took me twenty seconds to read and explained my problem more wholly to me than my months of contemplation. Thank you.

You know, my friend, that's about the deepest sort of appreciation I could expect. Even though I write in part because of my love for words and the different ways they can be made to behave, and in part (small part) to show off, the knowledge that a poem of mine may have highlighted something for someone is a reminder to me that poems can be like medicine. Thanks.

[PrinceMyshkin]

This hits home - I mean, minus the creamy shoulder part (more like a broad shoulder, for me I guess?). I'm cursed with being the 'little sister' figure to many of the guys I've always liked. And I've learned, over the years, to simply fill the gap with more, more of me - so much so that I've become very independent, and nervous of guys.

You'll figure out, I betcha, how to sustain and even strengthen that independence AND to be less nervous of guys because any one of them who's worthy of you is going to love you all the more because of that independence.


Again, with so many of your poems, it's not that it's wildly eloquent (though it is, certainly, eloquent) - it's the utter simplicity, the utter truthfulness - how you say so much in so few words - that makes your work absolutely brilliant. Prince, you're awesome.

Thanks, l'il buddy!

[PrinceMyshkin]

oh my gosh! what a great line! it is soooooo true! 'yer' so smart! ;):D
you really are and I like your poem.

Well, you must be purty smart yourself to recognize how smart I am!

[PrinceMyshkin]

I loved these lines most of all:

the less
I have of you, the more
I expand to fill the space between us.

What is more alluring
than the merest flash
of a creamy, cold shoulder?

I don't know why, but I suddenly had a flash in my head of lines from the song 'Build me up Buttercup' sung by The Foundations after I read this poem. The poem is different, but the one-sidedness feels related. Thank you for the poem. I have felt this before, or at least what I understand from the poem.

Sorry for overlooking your response earlier, and thank you.