Daddy Loveless

[Delta40]

I hear my Daddy's dying
that must mean he's goin'
Didn't he leave you in another time?
Yeah.
On the platform of hope
Jesus! Ain't that some ticket
in your hand...

I don't want to check it in
Coz of the baggage I might be holdin'

Drop it, baby and go home
Leave your Dad and his bags

Yeah

[Virgil]

Very interesting Delta. I could feel the tension there. My personal opinion is that it needs a little more. Something that leads to a fuller understanding of the relationship between father and daughter. A dozen questions beckon. But other people may disagree. These little short pieces are their own sort of art form. For me though the unanswered questions makes it feel incomplete. But I think the language (dialect) is interesting and supports the themes. I like it.

[Delta40]

You could be right Virgil. I am not much of a digger. The surface is so solid after all these years....My next post goes a tad deeper.

[Silas Thorne]

Hi Delta! :) I like the way you've expressed your ideas in the poem, but was a little confused by it overall, even after quite a few reads. I also think you could add more to make things a little clearer, but only if you really want to.

[Delta40]

Thanks Silas

it is a tangle and not sorted
like a ball of wool with no beginning
who wants to look for it?
Not me