She Would Have Laughed Too

[~Sophia~]

She Would Have Laughed Too



I’ll admit I laughed standing graveside - not
irreverently. More a sweaty, repellent,
spontaneously grotesque in the silence,
super-sized combo of three chirp trills

because I dodged that sickle un-scythed. 

Grass still greening, crowing, I covered you
knowing I’d be mown down someday
but it wasn’t that day and suddenly,
I had an uncontrollable need to get laid… 



But before I did, I prayed your new digs
were fantastic. I knew you'd love the granite.
Polished, cool to the touch - beautiful - like you.


Because - every secret we'd ever Ouija’d with
a candle and a bottle of wine came over me,
I went home laughing and loved everyone left.

___________________________________

[Virgil]

:lol: Oh how cruel. But funny and great poetry. I was surprised to see the inflected tense of mown used. I hadn't seen it inflected that way.
From M-W

2mow
Pronunciation: \ˈmō\
Function: verb
Inflected Form(s): mowed; mowed or mown \ˈmōn\ ; mow·ing
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English māwan; akin to Old High German māen to mow, Latin metere to reap, mow, Greek aman
Date: before 12th century
transitive verb
1 a: to cut down with a scythe or sickle or machine b: to cut the standing herbage (as grass) of
2 a (1): to kill or destroy in great numbers or mercilessly <machine guns mowed down the enemy> (2): to cause to fall : knock down b: to overcome swiftly and decisively : rout <mowed down the opposing team>
intransitive verb
: to cut down standing herbage (as grass)
— mow·er \ˈmō(-ə)r\ noun
But apparently it is a proper option.

The poem is excellent by the way in terms of language. Only qualm, does someone really have an uncontrolable urge to get laid in such a situation? Possibly but with all the mindless sex on TV and movies this just struck me as a semi-cliched reach. But perhaps it's sincere, I don't know. Another fine poem Sophia. :)

[~Sophia~]

:lol: Oh how cruel. But funny and great poetry. I was surprised to see the inflected tense of mown used. I hadn't seen it inflected that way.

But apparently it is a proper option.

The poem is excellent by the way in terms of language. Only qualm, does someone really have an uncontrolable urge to get laid in such a situation? Possibly but with all the mindless sex on TV and movies this just struck me as a semi-cliched reach. But perhaps it's sincere, I don't know. Another fine poem Sophia. :)

Hi Virgil! Thanks! I hoped it wouldn't sound cruel. I think a lot of people experience nervous laughter in tense, emotional moments. And in answer to your question regarding wanting to get laid; my understanding is that it's not that uncommon. Sex is the absolute affirmation of life. It allows us to look our own inevitable death in the eye and say "I'm still here".

This poem was written several years after a very dear friend died. She and I spent hours girl talking, laughing, conjuring up the perfect man, going out on double dates, comparing afterwards...

I didn't want to write a sentimental, teary poem for her. She would have hated that. It's why the title is "She Would Have Laughed Too".

I still laugh till I cry when I think about her!:D:bawling:

[Virgil]

Oh you did a great job. I didn't sense a nervous laughter. I think the line about getting laid shifted the meaning for me. It sounds like a celebration. Without that line I do see the nervous laughter. But I have to admit I have no idea when women feel the urge to get laid. ;) Lord knows I haven't been able to guess right too often. :p

Let'e see what others think on this issue. Perhaps it's me.

[~Sophia~]

Without that line I do see the nervous laughter. But I have to admit I have no idea when women feel the urge to get laid. ;) Lord knows I haven't been able to guess right too often. :p

Let's see what others think on this issue. Perhaps it's me.

Well you know Virgil, for a woman, it's emotional and starts in the mind. She would have jumped in on this conversation in a heart beat. http://www.websmileys.com/sm/angels/angel2.gif:lol: Let's wait and see!

[Virgil]

Actually Sophia these lines also suggest a gloating:

because I dodged that sickle un-scythed. 

Grass still greening, crowing, I covered you
knowing I’d be mown down someday
but it wasn’t that day and suddenly,
You dodged it, she didn't, you're now "crowing," and that it wasn't "that day" for you. I don't quite get nervous, sympathetic laughter there.

[~Sophia~]

Well, those lines were for her too. She was an actress with a local theatre production company. She played many parts over a span of about 5 years but, her best was as Peter Pan. It's a very personal poem and, I have no doubt will not be understood. But if you like it poetically and, enjoyed reading it, that pleases me to no end.

EDIT: I dunno Virgil, perhaps I should have kept this one in the drawer. I suspect I'll never be able to fully explain the person she was and the friendship we had. There were no secrets. We could and did tell each other everything no matter how morbid, stupid, hilarious, damaging. I could even tell her years later in this poem that as much as I loved her and would miss her forever, that day, at her funeral, I was happy to be alive.

[Virgil]

But it is a good poem.

[~Sophia~]

Big cyber hug, and thanks!

[PrinceMyshkin]

To me, that somewhat controversial line

and suddenly,
I had an uncontrollable need to get laid… 



nails the moment perfectly, whether one takes it as the species-command to create new life in the face of death, or the desire of the speaker to experience the most vital thing that she, but not her dead friend, can experience, and


I went home laughing and loved everyone left.


elevates or transforms that sentiment (not that it needed that, to me) from the more specifically raunchy to a spiritual celebration of the life that continues. That last line is so fine, in my view, and such an undeniable expression of the joy one sometimes overlooks, the joy of breathing and feeling and sharing those with others.

[ampoule]

I think you are my sister.

[Virgil]

nails the moment perfectly, whether one takes it as the species-command to create new life in the face of death, or the desire of the speaker to experience the most vital thing that she, but not her dead friend, can experience, and


This is true. I does work thematically. Still I personally have never had such an urge at a funeral. Now at the supermarket...;)

[~Sophia~]

To me, that somewhat controversial line


nails the moment perfectly, whether one takes it as the species-command to create new life in the face of death, or the desire of the speaker to experience the most vital thing that she, but not her dead friend, can experience, and



elevates or transforms that sentiment (not that it needed that, to me) from the more specifically raunchy to a spiritual celebration of the life that continues. That last line is so fine, in my view, and such an undeniable expression of the joy one sometimes overlooks, the joy of breathing and feeling and sharing those with others.

Thanks Prince. I think a funeral of someone you were close to brings out a host of feelings. I'd cried for days and then at the funeral, standing graveside, I knew her spirit had moved on and I was grateful to be alive. I'm no Freud but, I imagine subconsciously, most people give at least a silent thanks that they are still here.

_______________________________________


I think you are my sister..

Thanks ampoule! Nice to know I'm not the only one!!http://www.websmileys.com/sm/aliens/hae28.gif

_______________________________________

Virgil... what happened to your avatar??? I see a photo of a woman. I think her name is Logos?


This is true. I does work thematically. Still I personally have never had such an urge at a funeral. Now at the supermarket...

Don't get me started on vegetables! :lol: http://www.websmileys.com/sm/happy/143.gif

[qimissung]

I think that kind of nervous laughter occurs more when one is younger-it did for me anyway. This never sounded like a celebration to me, or like crowing AT ALL-throughout I sensed that you and your friend knew each other well, and that you were thinking of how you would react together in such a situation, and missing that you didn't still have her there to, in effect, go through this with.

I would have to disagree with Prince, thought, the "uncontrollable need to get laid" comes out of nowhere, and it kind of ruins the tone of the poem for me, but not enought that I don't like it. Honestly, I'm an introvert, and being alone in such a situation would be more natural. I believe that ~Sopia~ and Prince are kind of uber-extroverts, and so connection for them with other people takes on a kind of urgency for them. I've seen kids like this in my classroom.

Well done, again, ~Sophia~ and I, too, adore the last line. Life demands to be lived, even as we pause to grieve.

[PrinceMyshkin]

I would have to disagree with Prince, thought, the "uncontrollable need to get laid" comes out of nowhere

But that, I think, is precisely the point. It's not the thought she expected to have nor the one she'd have chosen to have, and the way it pops up suggests that it caught her, too, by surprise. It's an unfiltered, uncensored powerful reaction to the negative power of her friend's death...

[qimissung]

Well, dear Prince, if you read my entire post, you would have see that I explained (to my satisfacrtion anyway), the way people of different temperments can see the world. Just because it's not something I relate to doesn't mean that it isn't entirely natural for ~Sophia~.

[~Sophia~]

Prince, thanks for trying so hard to read my mind. I would caution you though, many have lost their own in the process http://www.websmileys.com/sm/crazy/240.gif


_____________________________________________



Well, dear Prince, if you read my entire post, you would have see that I explained (to my satisfacrtion anyway), the way people of different temperments can see the world. Just because it's not something I relate to doesn't mean that it isn't entirely natural for ~Sophia~.

Actually sweet Quimy, it's not like me at all. I have no idea why I laughed, or thought about getting laid or any of it. I was in my early 30's so, I can't say it was age. I think you were closer when you said I missed her and wanted her there to be going through this nightmare with me. I'm actually quite a loner and have never had a friend like her since. Not someone who knows EVERYTHING.

Maybe it was denial, I don't know. I remember thinking the whole thing was just absurd and expected her to pop up from around the corner at any moment.

It's impossible to explain (to myself as well). But it did happen and I wrote to her about the whole thing in this poem (though she was probably watching and buckled over to see me make such an azz of myself).

Thanks for reading and being open minded! http://www.websmileys.com/sm/cool/cool37.gif You're very cool!

[qimissung]

I remember that feeling very well, when someone has recently died, and you hear a voice or see a face-even at their funeral, and look around, thinking it's them. It's very painful.

I can understand wondering if you should have kept this private, but what is poetry if not to explore the many aspects of being human? And this is one of them, and this is an honest exploration of the messy and awkward. It's a beautiful poem, very visceral.

And thanks:)-you're very cool, too.:cool:

[~Sophia~]

She was young, healthy, vibrant, beautiful and in less than 30 seconds, she was gone. It just didn't make any sense and took a long time to sink in. Anyway, thanks for the supportive comments. You rock. http://www.websmileys.com/sm/happy/992.gif

[PrinceMyshkin]

Prince, thanks for trying so hard to read my mind. I would caution you though, many have lost their own in the process http://www.websmileys.com/sm/crazy/240.gif

What I have found in my own poems, even when they're in the first person, is that it's never exactly or wholly my mind that's on display, but my mind at that particular moment or an aspect of myself that I present as if it were a wholly independent persona. I think we all - creative people in particular - contain many personas. That might or might not apply to you; I wouldn't presume to say. I was addressing what I thought was a persona, the snapshot of a particular moment.

[~Sophia~]

I think we all - creative people in particular - contain many personas. That might or might not apply to you; I wouldn't presume to say. I was addressing what I thought was a persona, the snapshot of a particular moment.

As far as I'm aware, there are only three of us living in here. Me http://www.websmileys.com/sm/happy/046.gif, Myself http://www.websmileys.com/sm/happy/093.gif and I http://www.websmileys.com/sm/happy/1074.gif. We are an argumentative bunch though and 9 / 10 times, Me and Myself join forces http://www.websmileys.com/sm/mad/boese036.gif http://www.websmileys.com/sm/mad/boese045.gif to win the argument. I is very seldom allowed to intervene. http://www.websmileys.com/sm/mad/boese061.gif.

Thanks for your comments and for being a good sport Prince http://www.websmileys.com/sm/dressed/bek073.gif

[librarius_qui]

As far as I'm aware, there are only three of us living in here. Me http://www.websmileys.com/sm/happy/046.gif, Myself http://www.websmileys.com/sm/happy/093.gif and I http://www.websmileys.com/sm/happy/1074.gif. We are an argumentative bunch though and 9 / 10 times, Me and Myself join forces http://www.websmileys.com/sm/mad/boese036.gif http://www.websmileys.com/sm/mad/boese045.gif to win the argument. I is very seldom allowed to intervene. http://www.websmileys.com/sm/mad/boese061.gif.



:lol:

Not only the poem is good (very good to read), but your commentaries are precious as well :D


:thumbs_up
Lq#

[~Sophia~]

:lol:

Not only the poem is good (very good to read), but your commentaries are precious as well :D


:thumbs_up
Lq#

Thank you librarius! Poetry can get so serious. I like to lighten things up when I can.http://i604.photobucket.com/albums/tt122/Sophialid/zz2-main_Thumb.jpg