Martini
03-01-2009, 03:07 AM
Dear person I fell inlove with too late,
Your Penn State t-shirt. The one you gave me, the one I always liked. I washed your scent out of it. It no longer reminds me of carburetor or carbon monoxide. I’m not sure what else I have of yours. Maybe the bell jar, but that doesn’t hold any real meaning. I guess, her name being Esther and that you always wanted me to read it means enough. I have the boxes with in boxes, that finally unraveled Conan O’brian tickets for my 26th birthday during that awful year. I have Conan, only Conan is not the same. New time slot new dude. I have spinach rolls, and the memory of sharing one with you. I have videos and many pictures. They all make me miss you. Not having you at 5 am makes me the most upset. I think that’s when I miss you most. Every night I have the urge to call you and wake you up. I miss laughing with you. I miss your sense of ****ing humor. I miss your listening, your pretending not to listen. Although, I really did always think you were a dick when you did that. I wanna talk to you about 30 rock. I bet you like that show. We would talk about that show. You would let me tell you what I liked about it and you would humor me. I miss your self loathing and me crunching honey bunches of oats in your ear. I wanna fall asleep on the phone with you. I miss you loving me. I miss you checking on me. I miss you not caring about me. I miss your laugh. I miss you strangely. Even though I have these things I still miss you. Why aren’t they enough? Why is it too much? Shouldn’t I be satisfied? I have these things, they are all I have left of you.
Your Penn State t-shirt. The one you gave me, the one I always liked. I washed your scent out of it. It no longer reminds me of carburetor or carbon monoxide. I’m not sure what else I have of yours. Maybe the bell jar, but that doesn’t hold any real meaning. I guess, her name being Esther and that you always wanted me to read it means enough. I have the boxes with in boxes, that finally unraveled Conan O’brian tickets for my 26th birthday during that awful year. I have Conan, only Conan is not the same. New time slot new dude. I have spinach rolls, and the memory of sharing one with you. I have videos and many pictures. They all make me miss you. Not having you at 5 am makes me the most upset. I think that’s when I miss you most. Every night I have the urge to call you and wake you up. I miss laughing with you. I miss your sense of ****ing humor. I miss your listening, your pretending not to listen. Although, I really did always think you were a dick when you did that. I wanna talk to you about 30 rock. I bet you like that show. We would talk about that show. You would let me tell you what I liked about it and you would humor me. I miss your self loathing and me crunching honey bunches of oats in your ear. I wanna fall asleep on the phone with you. I miss you loving me. I miss you checking on me. I miss you not caring about me. I miss your laugh. I miss you strangely. Even though I have these things I still miss you. Why aren’t they enough? Why is it too much? Shouldn’t I be satisfied? I have these things, they are all I have left of you.