The language of the day

[Eugenie]

i have to admit I hate hanging around with others a lot these days. Not because they are not amusing or kind or comforting, but because of the language used.
It seems to me that with television(I don't watch it)and the net, the lowest common denominator is ever present when it comes to speaking. I feel honestly sick when I hear the F or other words used every two sentences.
It seems like the art, the beauty and delight in speech has just gone out the window in favour of swearing. it is so ugly to listen to and I feel sad when I am babysitting and the little child swears and something innocent seems gone forever.
I grew up with nannies,(my parents both had their own businesses), and my mother swore, worse than anyone.My dad didn't but he was never home.
Happily my nannies, au pairs, whatever, except a very few, were schooled, well read and liked to speak without any swearing at all.
I loved it and because I was in the dance and played piano, my world was filled with lovely speech and lovely music.
I know that when we are writing we often have crude rude characters in our stories, but then so did Charles Dickens and others. And they did not resort to that sort of thing in order to flesh out their people.
Why does everyone seem to do it now? What has happened. Are we lazy or unread or have we all accepted the teli as the norm , the proper way of expressing ourselves?
I guess that is why I prefer to read Austen and Dickens and Tolstoy and Dovesyovsky.
It seems so hopeless.:bawling:
Any thoughts out there?

[motherhubbard]

Goodness! I don't know when I've heard the F word. I think I'd probably fall over.

[Niamh]

Goodness! I don't know when I've heard the F word. I think I'd probably fall over.

Better not meet me in real life so! you'll fall over way too often!

[1n50mn14]

Cursing has become part of the language of the day.

I don't believe gratuitous cursing is necessary, but there are situations when the words are the best way to emphasize what one is trying to say.

I think swearing in a heated argument or when trying to make a serious point is the very worst time- resorting to foul language and name calling because you don't have a large enough vocabulary or enough creativity to come up with something else is pathetic. But as previously stated, there are certain situations where the f. word or the c.word just have that ring...

[Niamh]

I dont like the c word.

[1n50mn14]

Not a lot of people do.

[Lokasenna]

Swearing, if used properly in drama (both visual and written) can be used very convincingly. If you are just dropping swear-words casually into a conversation, then it serves little point other than to be vulgar.

I don't swear, simply because I see no real need to.

[Dori]

('Tis my preference to hear vulgar expressions than to listen to those who complain.)

Just think of it this way: With all this crudeness and vulgarity in what is supposedly "today's language," wouldn't that make delightful and beautiful speech, well, more delightful and beautiful? Like a breath of fresh air? ;)

[Taliesin]

Cursing has become part of the language of the day.

I don't believe gratuitous cursing is necessary, but there are situations when the words are the best way to emphasize what one is trying to say.

I think swearing in a heated argument or when trying to make a serious point is the very worst time- resorting to foul language and name calling because you don't have a large enough vocabulary or enough creativity to come up with something else is pathetic. But as previously stated, there are certain situations where the f. word or the c.word just have that ring...

Have you got any idea how large the swearword vocabulary is in some languages? How extensive? How emotional and creative? F*** and c*** can be annoying, yes, but banning swearwords from your speech isn't the only solution - you also could be more creative with your swearwords.

[Chava]

Have you got any idea how large the swearword vocabulary is in some languages? How extensive? How emotional and creative? F*** and c*** can be annoying, yes, but banning swearwords from your speech isn't the only solution - you also could be more creative with your swearwords.

OH oh, I want to go find my book of shakesperean insults now!

[Niamh]

I have a thread for shakespearian Insults somewhere....

[Eugenie]

It would indeed be a breath of fresh air to hear well crafted sentences.
Motherhubbard, are you joking? Surely you are joking. I cannot imagine anywhere that swearing isn't , except at church during service or at a funeral. NO that is not true.
I attended a dear friends funeral last week and no sooner had the casket left for internment then a group of guys downstairs where the dinner was to be served let loose and I felt my heart would break. It was so inappropriate.
I cannot bear to see a group of very little beautiful children playing dolls or superhero or whatnot and then hear them saying the f and the c word. It is so terrible, their innocence has been terribly compromised.
In Shakespear the insults were at least extremely creative and thought provoking, funny or despairing, they were ................art.
How many times in a row do you have to hear f this and f that before you just want to be in a room void of mortals. At least I do.I think constant swearing is such a form of laziness and lack of respect for the ears of your listener.

[Chava]

(From A Midsummer Nigths Dream; more or less as I remember it)

"With the help of a skilled surgeon he might recover, and still prove to be an ***"

Oh lovely Shakespeare. Now to the autmatic piece of equipment that censors these posts, we are only talking about a Donkey.

[librarius_qui]

..

It seems so hopeless.:bawling:
Any thoughts out there?

Mankind has always had .. bad words. It's in our nature. Actually, it's in nature itself, and it shouldn't be something we were ashamed of, but it ends out that it is, and there's no way of running from it.

Ancient Romans swore a lot.

There's always been these kind of things, so, first of all, don't get deceived: it isn't something from one century ago. No way! It's always been like this, and will always be.

Good part of the story is that THERE ARE people who don't use these words. You will find them. Keep searching.

Besides that, be an example yourself, with your life. For instance, even when I have to show my anger or wrath through speech (which eventually happens), I choose literary terms (that make me sound like a pirate, in Portuguese, but, well ... I have to choose: and I'll either use a .. 'n "ugly" word, or a literary one; I choose the latter).

I was really angry about someone, recently, and I HAD to say something about his mother ... (It wasn't personally, or against him, but about him, because he had done something that was really mean.)

In Portuguese, there are two ways of doing so. First one means his mother's a whore. Second choice, mare, too, though, "whore" in Portuguese is offensive, but "mare" isn't. Actually, mare is even literary. I said with myself (and my god) that his mother was a mare!.

Later on, I saw that I should never have thought like that of him, but I was angry, at the moment, and I had to say I was angry. So I did.

Most people don't have such cares, though, and it isn't for everyone to have, but to gentlemen, ladies & maidens ... And (some) writers. (Not for actors or for poets, for instance ... At least, not in Brasil.)

I'm close to a writer.


That's what I think.~

[The Comedian]

I think swears are like neon lights: too many and the emphasis/shock that they have the power to supply is lost. If used in the context of infrequency, then and nice, powerful expression of force and candor can carry through.

:)

[librarius_qui]

..~

It seems like the art, the beauty and delight in speech has just gone out the window in favour of swearing. it is so ugly to listen to and I feel sad when I am babysitting and the little child swears and something innocent seems gone forever.

I grew up with nannies,
..

It seems so hopeless.:bawling:
Any thoughts out there?

Now, when you're responsible for a child, even if he isn't your child, for a couple of hours, for a night, they are under your authority: you could, perhaps, try to talk with him, and see to ... be the person in his life who will say so.

Maybe you won't change his life. But it's worth the effort! :rolleyes:

Have hope, girl!

[cfh]

it is quite common in many turn of the century novels that rather rough language was used by characters that it portrayed. many of the conversations and interactions between members of the working classes and especially between the sexes sets up some shocking and taboo situations.

we have not invented any new height of immorality in our speech nor have our sentiments become dulled. we are the most tolerant culturally than we have ever been.

[higley]

It's interesting that a lot of words that were scandalous once, or at least just crass, are quite diluted in their potency today. Like a particular one I say a lot; I didn't know until recently that only a few decades ago it carried more weight than it does today. At any rate I apply cursing like I would a fire extinguisher--only when necessary.

[Eugenie]

I have never felt the need for a swear word to emphasize my feelings or bring more punch to the point. Never. So perhaps, that is why I don't understand its appeal. To me it is so very ugly and low and worthless. Honestly. But that is only my feelings on the matter.:)

[Emil Miller]

I have never felt the need for a swear word to emphasize my feelings or bring more punch to the point. Never. So perhaps, that is why I don't understand its appeal. To me it is so very ugly and low and worthless. Honestly. But that is only my feelings on the matter.:)

I see from your profile that you are located in a little village. If you lived in London your refusal to swear would be put under serious strain.

[Chava]

We had a rather humorous incident here when the prince was being asked about his potency (in connection with his recent second marriage) due to the wild stories of his drinking habits. Instead of ignoring him or telling him to **** off as I'm sure he would have liked to, the prince said instead; "Now I ask your pardon not to be nosewise sir." Nosewise-næsevis in Danish, is a rather rude form of having a cheeky attitude, but NO one says it these days. :) He was national laughing stock for a whole week.

[Eugenie]

Love it.
Brian, you are mistaken, truly. I lived in a city of over a million for a long while and I was made fun of my not swearing, it was a topic of jokes and teasing. But it did not phase me. And I think had I indulged, all my friends would have fainted. I think because I am somewhat preoccupied in my mind when people are talking, I have to focus and pay attention, perhaps the delay gives me an edge. Don't know. Only one person in my family swears and she could make a hard edged swearing guy blush. Yikes.

[Emil Miller]

Love it.
Brian, you are mistaken, truly. I lived in a city of over a million for a long while and I was made fun of my not swearing, it was a topic of jokes and teasing. But it did not phase me. And I think had I indulged, all my friends would have fainted. I think because I am somewhat preoccupied in my mind when people are talking, I have to focus and pay attention, perhaps the delay gives me an edge. Don't know. Only one person in my family swears and she could make a hard edged swearing guy blush. Yikes.

Well I admire your fortitude. Although swearing has become pervasive these days, I agree with you that it is unpleasant and adds nothing to conversation. It has been said that swearing is the first resort of the inarticulate; I tend to agree.

[librarius_qui]

One of my favourite movies is _Scent of a woman_.

(I had a girlfriend, once -- good that it's over now ... -- who hated it, because the main character swears all the time.)

Maybe it's a thing of some girls, too, to be highly upset about people swearing at their side.

I say this, though I don't usually swear (I could dare say --never--), and am not particularly happy when someone exagerates at my side ...

[weltanschauung]

what is really bad is the fluffy sweet hypocrisy.
besides, the f word is the most versatile word in the engrish language, it can be a verb, a noun, an adjective, an adverb...
praise the f word!

[Eugenie]

I have a friend, a guy, who would agree to that.:) In fact, to tease me once he used the word in over a hundred sentences on a small four by six inch paper and put it in a frame and then placed that on my flower table.
A few weeks later when our home was broken into , the officers arrived and were searching for clues. One saw the 'art', called his brother officer and asked me if I knew who wrote it. I thought nothing of it, told them, and they proceeded to look for him to question him about the robbery. I could not believe it and we laughed and laughed about that after. They also took it as 'evidence. '
Hey Brian I LOVE THAT. 'swearing is the first resort of the inarticulate. I have a friend who owns a laser printing store, I will get him to write that on a t-shirt for me.
Of course I will not wear it near any hangouts where you can only get in with the F word! ( I mean I do want to live. :)

I am not saying I say a word to a person that swears away. I don't. I don't judge that person. I just cannot personally handle the sound of it and somehow I feel diminished as a person when I hear it. I cannot explain it so I won't try.

[Lady Marian]

I feel the way you do, Eugenie, and I'm glad to find another person who doesn't swear. I had begun to feel a little hopeless about the language of the world in general myself. :)

[kasie]

Good for you, Eugenie, stick to your principles. And BB is right, swearing shows nothing so much as a poverty of expression.

I had a very creative landlady once who recognised the need for expletives from time to time and could be heard crying from the kitchen, 'Oh, Buckets of Blood!' or 'Suspenders and Stocking Tops!' However, we all ducked for cover if we saw her prowling round the house growling under her breath, 'Muttered Oaths!'

My devout Chapel-going mother resorted to her native Welsh at moments of stress: there's something very releasing about crying out 'Ach ar fi!' - which actually doesn't mean much more than 'That's disgusting!' but the 'ch' sound can be rolled out like a dog barking with a sore throat and is very expressive! :D

[Eugenie]

Ha ha, you are all so dear! Thankyou for sharing.
I love those stories.
And yes, there is something about rolling the ch sound.
I had a roommate who swore so much I began to realize she never actually ever said more than four words together without expletives. I found it truly tiring although I loved her very much.
One day i asked her if she would just try to say something else perhaps that would soothe her. She admitted she loved the sound of the f word, etc and she could see nothing that would appeal to her as much. But then she remembered what her darling , gentle naive grandmother always said in times of joy and surprise.
"I will use 'gracious' she said and for a long she just inserted gracious instead of the offending word. It totally took back her equally swearing friends and they hated it. And I hated it because it is a gentle good word and now I knew it had other meanings. :) Eventually she went back to her own ways and I just tuned her out and thought no more about it.
Lady Marian and Kasie, for fun, I think I will get a blank t shirt and anyone I meet who doesn't care to swear, I will have them put their name on the shirt with indelible ink.
then, on my blue days when I don't even want to stir out of the house because of all the foul mouths lurking out there, I will wear my t shirt and be happy. yay!

[Eugenie]

Honestly, when you hear a bad curse word, what goes through your mind, and do you feel anything negative or does it sound right to your ears? I really want to know how people feel when they hear this.
For me, no matter how cool I try to be, it is like walking into a room and seeing something dreadful, like a person cheating on another with someone new, or like finding out someone you trusted is not what you thought at all. That same sort of shock and let down sensation. More than that I cannot explain that dreadful feeling I get.

[BienvenuJDC]

You've heard of those who swear every other word...well, working in the construction field, I (more than) once heard a young man insert a swear word within the syllables of a word. I never use such unnecessary language.

[JuniperWoolf]

I like swear words. If used correctly they add a lot of punch. They're harsh, and real and have been around for a long, long time. One of my favorite quotes with a swear word in it is from Apocolypse Now. I'm not allowed to swear here, so I'm going to have to resort to the stupid stars.

"They teach young men to drop fire on people, but they won't let then write F*** on their aeroplanes because... IT'S OBSCENE!"
-Kurtz

Swears are honest, gritty and human. I think that to deny crude langage is to deny a part of humanity.