The Bigot's Song

[Dori]

Finally.
Two years, I liked you.
Two years! Seven-hundred,
thirty days
at least.
'Tis too long for love to linger.
(It was more than love
or so it seemed.)

Never
was I your stalker.
Only your slave---
to be lead on
and in a moment
rejected.
Fun and games.

Question of the day:
Why?
Permit be to be frank:
That man,
Your friend,
the churlish child
imbued with bigotry,
had his fun.
Accusations---
Stalker. Rapist. Murderer.
Homosexual. Faggot.

To be the subject of such hate,
forces one to ponder
Hamlet's most sung song---
"To be, or not to be"
Can hate
spurn such suicidal thoughts?

You still ask, "Why?"
(As if you cared.)
But I declare it!
I'll embellish the question
Adorn it with emphasis

WHY?!

Emphatic enough?
Perhaps not.
Suffice, it shall. But to
Make sure, here I go:

Why? Why such remarks?
Why hate?
Why amuse yourself?
at the innocent's expense?
Is it fear? Perhaps jealousy?
Pure fun, oh yes,
To inflict such murd'rous
wounds,
Wounds able enough
to destroy love's promise,
to bring out the worst
in all of us.
Only to boast the man's boast.
Barbarism. Bigotry. Bullsh*t.

Why? I now repeat
Softly---even sonorously
A smile plays on my face.

'Tis true, I love you
nevermore
Hate's words---
the bigot's most creative song yet
Are the words of still another

human being.

That human being
is just like you
just like me.

Nothing ever came of hating

the bigot's song.

Dearest bigot,
I understand.
Thank you.

[PabloQ]

Powerful. Beautiful.

[Dori]

Powerful. Beautiful.

Thanks for those two words. I can't tell you how happy they make me. :)

[~Sophia~]

Why? Why such remarks?
Why hate?
Why amuse yourself?
at the innocent's expense?
Is it fear? Perhaps jealousy?
Pure fun, oh yes,
To inflict such murd'rous
wounds,
Wounds able enough
to destroy love's promise,
to bring out the worst
in all of us.
Only to boast the man's boast.
Barbarism. Bigotry. Bullsh*t.


Hi Dori. This is a very powerful poem and the part I've quoted above could stand on its own. A poem within a poem. Applause goes here.

[qimissung]

This is gorgeous, powerful. You have done an outstanding job with this, Dori.

[Dori]

Hi Dori. This is a very powerful poem and the part I've quoted above could stand on its own. A poem within a poem. Applause goes here.


This is gorgeous, powerful. You have done an outstanding job with this, Dori.


To both of you, thanks. I'm speechless.

I wrote this in a state of extreme emotion; I was trembling. And for it to be so well received! Ah, it fills me with joy...

You guys have no idea...
I'll shut up now.

[a_little_wisp]

Honest and - if I may say it again - 'powerful'. I think, if you're a good poet, you can move the exact feelings that you felt, or evoke new ones, just as powerful, when you wrote it into the person reading it - and you've done that here. Well done, Dori!! :D

[Dori]

Honest and - if I may say it again - 'powerful'. I think, if you're a good poet, you can move the exact feelings that you felt, or evoke new ones, just as powerful, when you wrote it into the person reading it - and you've done that here. Well done, Dori!! :D

Thanks! :D
I appreciate it. :)

[LostPrincess13]

She must be some girl for you to feel so strongly...
LUCKY GIRL!:D
She was able to steal a poet's heart...:)

[Dori]

She must be some girl for you to feel so strongly...
LUCKY GIRL!:D
She was able to steal a poet's heart...:)

'Tis a shame she feels that she is not good enough. Apparently I'm some shining beacon of virtue while she's some "bulimic, masochistic whore" (her words, mind you).

Oh, and my heart is somewhat easily stolen, I would say. Only to be toyed with, ripped apart, thrown in a grinder, and then into a wood chipper.

[Silas Thorne]

I'm afraid I'll black hat your word gatherings, Dori. I think it's great that you attempted something this long, and while I can see the obvious emotion in the poem, there are a few reasons why, personally, I don't like it.

One small point. This section reminds me of Yoda speech:

Emphatic enough?
Perhaps not.
Suffice, it shall.

And also, why
pause
so much
in mid-phrase?
I'm not sure it adds much in places

But overall, this poem reminds me less of poetry and more of an emotional outpouring or rhetorical speech, which, though, can be emotionally good in itself. If the appreciation of the audience for the topic is removed, I'm not sure if it will still be seen as a poem.

I do, however, applaud your continued efforts in poetry. Keep it up! :) And yes, the lines Sophia mentioned are really good stuff, particularly:
Wounds able enough
to destroy love's promise,
to bring out the worst
in all of us.
Only to boast the man's boast.
Barbarism. Bigotry. Bullsh*t. .

Again, just my opinion. :) Have a great day!

[Dori]

I'm afraid I'll black hat your word gatherings, Dori. I think it's great that you attempted something this long, and while I can see the obvious emotion in the poem, there are a few reasons why, personally, I don't like it.

One small point. This section reminds me of Yoda speech:

Emphatic enough?
Perhaps not.
Suffice, it shall.

:lol: Yes, it does...


And also, why
pause
so much
in mid-phrase?
I'm not sure it adds much in places

I think, after rereading it, I agree. I originally wrote this on three lined sheets of paper. When I wrote it, I was more concerned with emotion than structure, so that would be why. I can, and might, be revised. :)


But overall, this poem reminds me less of poetry and more of an emotional outpouring or rhetorical speech, which, though, can be emotionally good in itself. If the appreciation of the audience for the topic is removed, I'm not sure if it will still be seen as a poem.

Maybe. *sits in contemplation*


I do, however, applaud your continued efforts in poetry. Keep it up! :) And yes, the lines Sophia mentioned are really good stuff, particularly:
Wounds able enough
to destroy love's promise,
to bring out the worst
in all of us.
Only to boast the man's boast.
Barbarism. Bigotry. Bullsh*t. .

Again, just my opinion. :) Have a great day!

I shall! I already have an idea for my next poem (which is something of an experiment...we'll see!). :)

I value your opinion just as much (if not more) than the others who have replied. (The only reason I would value your opinion more is because I value criticism more than praise. It's certainly a lot more helpful. But praise is good too! :D)

So thanks for the criticism! :D