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Ivory_Flower
02-11-2009, 07:39 PM
I wrote this yesterday night. I know the metrics is imperfect and the theme is quite simple, but thi is one of my first experiments of verses in English, which is not my first language...so sorry for mistakes... :D

The most secret fragments of my soul,
something burning in the deepest hole
of hell, so I feel tonight,
now that madness' covering my sight.

Take me, darkness, to new worlds,
use melodic sounds and words.
I am blind, but I can hear,
so I'm going to fight my fear.

Nothing else can save me now.
Where can I reach you, and how?
be you my only salvation:
hope is chocked by desperation.

IF

Delta40
02-11-2009, 09:27 PM
I like hope is chocked by desperation. I am very new at poetry myself and have been told about cadence and rhthym. I think this poem would be best read aloud. One could then fully appreciate its passion.

Ivory_Flower
02-12-2009, 06:38 AM
Thanks a lot! I'm not able to judge my poems objectively... so I need someone else who do it for me...:D