there were secret paths...

[Silas Thorne]

there were secret paths known to us,
bird s hit paths within bridges
where we could walk
straddling electrical cable:
Deathstar catwalks,
an empty vast droppingdown on both sides,
where the wind gets in
making the inside, outside.

Without keys, no adult could get in there,
but we were adventurers, magicians,
coming out behind our parents
waiting for us on the other bank,
who wondered where the hell we'd got to.

[jon1jt]

The first stanza has a watercolory atmosphere, and kittenish sounds of the forest, and misty-faced children drinking in its greens and luke browns romping down hilly paths full circle along the roads that lead back to the place with locks, to the parents who've lost their keys to summer's honeycombs. Very very nice Mr. poet man.

(now just nudge over the 's' in L2 to make the bird birds. ;) )

[Silas Thorne]

Thanks jon. But I think I might have taken you back to your own misted forests. I get what you mean though. ;)



(now just nudge over the 's' in L2 to make the bird birds. ;) )

:lol: And here are the lines as I intended:

there were secret paths known to us,
bird**** paths within bridges

[jon1jt]

Thanks jon. But I think I might have taken you back to your own misted forests. I get what you mean though. ;)


It's the scrapbook page of a reminiscience. And just remember that I first had to go through your misty forest to get to mine.

I like the poem 100X better with the word birdsh*t because to treat childhood separate from real experience is to deny the many times we stepped in poop. And where or whose a*s it came from is really besides the point. ;)

[Delta40]

I thought you meant bird **** paths actually glad I got it right! You are amazing. How do you mix up, churn, create and post for our joy?

[jon1jt]

I thought you meant bird **** paths actually glad I got it right! You are amazing. How do you mix up, churn, create and post for our joy?

Between you and Silas gracing this stage with all your wild poesies (that kick like ponies) I do hereby declare this day of January 10, 2009, Delta & Silas Day! Now lemme fill my glass with some Pinot and we got ourselves a party, people---yippeeee! :p

Exquisite, you two ---way to go.

[Delta40]

She bowed her tresses grun