New poem, experimental style

[imaginaryheart]

Intelligent isolation
Nostalgic memories
Imaginary darkness

Independent characters
Destructive universe
Closed curtains

Messy bed
Organized thoughts
Hungry desires

Detatched emotions
Detailed observations
Unique style

Quiet space
Object Infested
Room

[imaginaryheart]

She's becoming like me
More and more each day we live together
And how do I feel?
I'm finding out how it would be like to be with myself
All of my faults coming to the surface
What I don't do seemingly hurts the most
Leaves her feeling dead inside
I just want to escape, dissapear
Not exist anymore
Become the loner that I have always been
But I don't vanish into oblivion
I just sit here to think until I don't want to think anymore
Waiting for something to happen

[Dark Muse]

I really like the first one, I thought the style was quite interesting, but it worked well.

[imaginaryheart]

Thank you for the feedback. I decided to try another one.

Secret Lair
Hidden dimension
Hesitant time

Broken starlight
Memorizing dreams
Quantifying substance

Wooden time-machine
Petrified walls
Absent ceiling

Open treasure
Uneven floor-boards
Pirateship

[imaginaryheart]

Black eyes
Fallen stars
Fictional dimensions

Colored dust
Dying worlds
New substance

Forgetful existance
Unexplored forever
Abandoned thoughts

Left behind
Unknowing partisapant
Scary circumstance

Lost worm-holes
Choatic departsure
Death

[MorpheusSandman]

I like these... Kind of staccato surrealist imagery where the stanzas gain in resonance by their individual harmony through minimalist concatenation. The last one is the best because it manages to make each line evocative but gain in power with each subsequent line.