Subject Poetry Contest.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

I honestly don't know what I'm going do to here.

It's going to be a tough row to hoe.
Something to entertain you during your evaluation... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tmZuWrpX98g
Good luck

[Melanie]

Love your sense of humor, Gilliatt. Intermission...what a great idea. I watched the youtube, funny stuff, and the end was amazing the way Stan Laurel could switch from the role of Lord back to his silly character so easily.

[prendrelemick]

Ok, as I type these thoughts I still have no idea who will get the nod.

Melanie has put some of herself into her entry, you can feel the personal involvement and the importance of the episode for her, that gives the poem an extra significance that is hard to resist. There are some great lines too - "to purge all his worldly essence". Your own lines are so much more engaging than the quoted parts.

Pendragon's entry is both clever and poetical, but also has a deeper meaning beyond the surface words. The quote about the uncertain note is a pertinent lesson for life - as the poem tells. I'd never heard it before but it could become one of my favourite quotes of all time.

As usual Darkmuse has posted an intriguing entry. What's the story? What's the message? It cranks up, there is a subtle menace and then gently releases and in the end teases.

Caician. This is one of those poems of yours that leave me scratching my head in puzzlement - but don't change.

YesNo, a bang on certain winner at any other time, well crafted, funny, engageing, mysterious, some brilliant lines - "unseduce him"- and "Hey! Gwendolyn's here!" - just great.

How can I not give it to Melanie?
But I love YesNo's
And Pendragon's .


So with my trumpet sounding very uncertainly and bearing in mind I'm not allowed to have a three way tie.....

I'll plump for MELANIE - because I felt an emotional nudge as I read her entry.

[cacian]

prendrelemick thank you and Melanie congratulations!!!

[Pendragon]

Thank you, prendrelemick, you are most kind! Congratulations for a well earned win, Melanie!!!

[Melanie]

Thank you everyone! I liked them all and was glad I didn't have to be the judge. I felt your pain prendrelemick. Well done to all. And thank you, for taking the time to write us all a thoughtful critique. I must say, your subject choice, "a message", was very inspiring and fun to do. I'll post a new subject within a few of hours

[Melanie]

The next subject is Flight.
...whether it be something that is caught up by the wind or,
to take flight as to flee or escape something, etc.
The deadline is July 15th.

[Dark Muse]

I Fly Home To You

I hovered upon the edge
on the verge of jumping,
to feel myself fall endlessly below,
to never know the end,
embraced finitely within the darkness.

I was poised for descent
with no where else left to go,
nowhere to turn, I left no space
for returns, I counted on no
escape routes.

But the moment I left myself go,
and waited for the inevitable drop,
gave myself to gravity's mercy,
I was overcome by a sudden weightlessness.

You were there, your words
in my ear give me strength,
and however badly I might fall,
your hands will catch me in the end,
and lift me up.

I watch the darkness begin to fade,
and feel the wind rush under me,
it bears me up, carries me through
the air, and I know I am free
because you refused to accept defeat.

You are my escape,
and you make the impossible a reality,
because of your love,
I defy gravity, you bestow my heart
the wings of Mercury, and I am born
away home to you.

[Pendragon]

Flight of the Bumblebee
(With my sincere apologies to Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakov)

A bee buzzed beside my ear
A bumble bee all black and yellow
He was upset because I disturbed his feeding
He launched at me and did a dance
Easily dodging my frantic slapping
It was only a matter of time before he stung me
I've always been taught that those fragile wings
Should not allow the bee to fly...
Sometimes nature outweighs physics
Sometimes the way things are exceeds evolution
Sometimes science has to accept the improbable
Anyway, I just got stung by an angry flying bumblebee...

Pendragon
(C) 6252013

[YesNo]

The weather warms the summer day.
There's children swimming in the bay.
Connect to what? The guru may
Breathe deep and stay aware.

There's seagulls flying overhead.
In spite of what that guru said,
Our many flights have merely led
To distance everywhere.

Connect. Rise above.
Reconnect. Lace up love.
The serpent strengthens the bond.

The weather chills the winter day.
There's ice on ice upon the bay.
Connect to what? Tonight we may
Breathe deep to stay aware.

[prendrelemick]

canto 'o buried tales

When June comes in with mornings bright,
And Beds are showered with early light,
Then dreams sit near the waking eye,
And flights of fancy take to sky.

Then faces known and faces lost,
People loved and people crossed,
Parade across our REMing state,
Through Worlds and places we create.

Roads we trod and those not taken,
Lovers we knew and those forsaken,
The child we held is ours once more,
Our mother is standing at the door

From shadows deep and dark and dire,
Raised up from our subconscious mire,
Our deepest fears find face and form,
In shadowy figures intent on harm.

But morning swallows twittering high,
Return the Self behind the eye,
Reality comes in cascading,
And dreams are just an echo fading.


This poem is proof were it needed
Some of my stuff has not suceeded,
Poetic fail is demonstrated,
With tortured rhyme and rhythm castrated.

[cacian]

time flies

towards
the skies
fly the masts
of timeless pasts
the winds blow
high tideless and wide
but memories rise
purest and fast
landing is ride

[Melanie]

Enjoy this brief on-topic intermission while
I take a little time to choose a winner:
:lurk5:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZ2SWXwoYwQ

The contest is now closed. Thank you everyone
for these excellent entries...I'll be back.

[Melanie]

Dark Muse - I read this several times which brought me from a literal and uncomfortable interpretation of "attempted suicide" to more of an imagined suicide of self turmoil and despair replaced by faith in your lover's healing devotion to restore the best in you. It's a beautiful love story...and I'm a sap for happy endings...from darkness to the freedom from self doubt.

cacian - very clever to pick fleeting "time" for the flight subject. I enjoyed this piece a lot.

predrelemick - i'll strike the last stanza :smile5: because I liked everything about this poem. Many of your lines struck a chord with me. They had a realness to it and a familiarity where we can all relate. I could "feel" as I read many gems like, "faces known and faces lost", "people loved and people crossed", "roads we trod and those forsaken", and more. The there is a stanza in the middle that turns dark which adds a nice depth and balance to your poem. Every line well penned.

YesNo - Your 3-line stanza among the 4-line stanzas presented in minimally short sentences was unexpected and added intrigue to the flow. Nicely done.

Pendragon - This was a fun poem to read with an interesting fact that I'm not sure I ever knew before. I guess if the bumblebee is stubborn enough to defy the laws of physics then it stands to reason he'll have an attitude. The sting...you okay? I really liked the 3 lines in a row that all started with "sometimes" building a momentum to the punchline. Very well thought out.

There was a tie between prendrelemick and Dark Muse so I had to really think about it.

Congrats to Dark Muse! You made me think about the poem and when I eventually sorted it out, it left me with a real appreciation for unconditional love that knows no bounds. You orchestrated that message like a ballet. (Note: my spellcheck changed "bounds" to "blonds"...love knows no blonds, ha)

[Dark Muse]

Thank you very much this one did come from a very personal place.

I will have the next subject up soon, just need some time to think a good one up.

[Dark Muse]

The next subject is Anarchy

I am going to be leaving for vacation soon so I won't be able to judge until I get back, so I will make the deadline Aug. 5th

[prendrelemick]

Thanks for those kind words Melanie. I would've chosen Dark Muse's too.

[Pendragon]

Congrats, Dark Muse. And yes, I'm fine, Melanie. The stupid bees nest every year under the aluminum on my mobile home. can't see to get rid of them, although God knows I;ve tried!

[prendrelemick]

Rise like Lions after slumber
In unvanquishable number -
Shake your chains to earth like dew
Which in sleep had fallen on you -
Ye are many – they are few.

From “The Mask of Anarchy”. by Percy Bysshe Shelly.



The time was ripe back then,
When came that call to working men,
We could've done it then.

Now link by link, inch by inches,
Beguiled by cars and larder fridges,
In mortgaged homes that feel like riches,
Crowing over petty victories,
Chains are once again our due,
We give ourselves to their embrace.

In fact, we demand our chains,
And hand back our father's gains

And anarchy?
Anarchy's a fashion label,
Traded round the boardroom table,
Easy terms through optic cable,
Promoted by gone viral fables,
Fight the system! Buy the T shirt!
Stay in your bedroom, no one gets hurt.


.

[cacian]

anarchy
your time is come
to perish gone
your dome is sunk
to lowest runk
lest you part
dune
to nowhere known
returned is blown

[YesNo]

Normally rash anarchy
Can make an angry mess.
That guillotine must surely mean
Who cares what I confess.
Crank up; drop down. The feisty town
Will see my round head curve.
What once stood tall will get to fall
Unless they lose their nerve.
They're planning to make sure I'm through
Before tomorrow ends.
I've had my fun, and they've had none.
Let's meet in hell as friends.

[Pendragon]

"Another Word for Nothing Left to Loose"
(With apologies to the memory of Janice Joplin)

Don't hold me back, just let me go
The Law only applies to the weak and small
Don't need anyone to live my life
Maybe you don't like it when I have a good time
Rules and regulations promote no change
The only good rule is a rule I can break
Viva Anarchy! Let the whole world fall:
Crowley said "Do what thou wilt" shall be the whole of the law...

(C) Pendragon 7.23/2014

[Melanie]

chaos without a ruler

pour us all a daiquiri
or two to help us through
man's experimental refractory
internet anarchy

[Dark Muse]

Just letting you know I am recently returned from vacation and I have not forgotton about this, just been busy with stuff, but I will try to get to it tomorrow.

[Dark Muse]

All great entries. This one was really hard to judge. I loved reading each of these poems.

cacian: Quite interesting, your poems always merit a few read through. It does leave one something to think about it, though still remaining quite baffling. There was some nice play with words.

YesNo: I do have a soft spot for beheading and have a certain fascination with the French Revolution, which this poem put me in the mind of. It was quite enjoyable to read, and I rather liked the bit of gallows (or should I say guillotine) humor imparted within this one. I thought the last line was great.

Pendragon: Really enjoyed this. I quite enjoyed the Carpe diem like attitude expressed within this one. And as always it was masterfully penned, concise and to the point, without a single word wasted, and powerfully expressed.

Melanie: Short and yet quite powerful, this poem does pack quite the punch behind.

And the winner is:

prendrelemick: Ah, this one was so sad and yet so very true. I really enjoyed this one, because it was so reflective of the modern culture. Indeed, the days for the revolution has long gone and passed. A great comment on the youth of today in the last stanza. Few people no are truly willing to rise up make waves, and take action.

[Pendragon]

Congrats, prendrelemick!

[cacian]

Dark Muse thank you and congratulations prendrelemick!!!

[prendrelemick]

Thank you


The next subject is a word that could have many different connotations.


VENUS.

[cacian]

venus
fervent yet esteemed
you shine upon
a feen
like diamonds on a reen

[Pendragon]

Fly Trap

Venus was the Goddess of Beauty so it seems strange
That a carnivorous plant should share her name
It wraps and enfolds insects in its bear trap leaves
Held close as if by a lover in sweet dreams
Or perhaps it was the tale of Vulcan's golden net trap
That caught Venus in flagrante delicto in its grasp
Fornicating with Mars, that describes the Fly Trap
Sticky situations always lead to heartache and Death
But for a Goddess so fair, what fame would it bring:
"You are NOT going to associate me with that thing!"

Pendragon
(C) 8/10/2013

[YesNo]

With scent of myrtle, mysteries
Are offered to the light,
And when she's clothed, her lover sees
How beautiful is white.
The rose blooms red to test her lips
That touched his own and so
The rounded softness of her hips
Won't let his eyes let go.
The forest where they made their bed
One April by a stream
Flows through their days, through wedded ways,
Well-fed upon a dream.

[Dark Muse]

Dionaea muscipula

She possesses a strange
alien beauty
not appreciated by every eye,
and yet she is indifferent
to disapproving looks
for her own tastes
are of the highly acquired kind,
sweetly she tempts admirers
most would find revolting,
lures them in with promises,
and succulent little offerings,
they never see it coming,
but once she knows she has them snared,
she snaps her jaws tight,
and hungrily devours,
those that so gullibly came to her calling,
and so callous her heart
she takes no time to mourn
nor regret, for her hunger
is most insatiable,
and all too soon they are forgotten
while she lays out her traps
for the next to bestow
their misbegotten
affection.

[Melanie]

Ode to The Venus of Willendorf

O for to pity thou Venus of Willendorf
Awakened from thy sediment slumber
From the Danube riverbanks to the north
Far from the stares of paleolithic hunters.
Thy curvaceous form turned statued goddess,
Goddess of Fertility and Fatness?
The earliest form of woman's worth undermined
Thus a naked truthness:
No face chiseled on thy bowed and covered head!
Minimizing the most sensual organ:—the mind

[tailor STATELY]

A Golden Sierra Walk One August Night

Alone with my thoughts I walk briskly towards the West;
its horizon before me this leg of the path of the oval track
In sight, Venus' bright beam punctuates the sky above
a thin waxing crescent Moon low in the darkening sky
One can see earthshine - reflected sunlight from the Earth
faintly illuminating the Moon where it does not shine this ev'n
Diana's moon ! Her bow, I recall - befitting the huntress
Is she on the hunt tonight seeking quarry? I solemnly reflect
My muse sings to me, closing with a familiar wailing lament
that wrenches my spirit; reminding me of my own madness
It's said Venus shines brightest to those whose hearts are
aglow with the greater light of love: Love, where is thy sting ?
Around I go upon the oval, now facing East, where flitting
bats wheel in the darkness before me; the oak trees closing in

*8/13/2013

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

[prendrelemick]

^Haha, I'm always tweaking my stuff too. A poem is never finished.


Some very high quality posy here. Shall we say another 10 days for further entries? that's on or around the 25th of August.

[tailor STATELY]

I'm game. (lol)

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

[prendrelemick]

Last chance bump.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

Sorry for the last minute. If you've already assembled your comments, then we'll chock this one up to time killer while the judges convene.

The Right to Bear Arms

Gilliatt, If only I had arms to hold you
Oh Venus my love let us depart de Milo,
set sail for the land of the free,
where it’ll take only a 2nd to amend
what Alexandros did intend for thee.

Remington the sculptor will fit you with arms.
You’ll hold me tight, we’ll teach to write,
(aside) Do you think she’ll use her left or her right?
how to snap a bra and cover those perky charms.

[cacian]

Bump!! :icon_bs:

[prendrelemick]

Cacian – Unique. I loved the word you made up on another thread “runk”– a cross between “rung” and “rank” but reen and feen?

Pen – The - find an angle and run with it - school of poetry. As usual, done well. I always like the way you think, and the progression from one idea to the next. Also brownie points for the classical allusions

Dark muse - Same idea but remains focused on the plant. I liked the extreme Pathetic Fallacy and the cold pitch of the language used. You write with a confidence that shows in your stuff.

Melanie.- Not only do you think of something unusual, you then take it in such an interesting direction. and very cleverly done - the question mark, the choice of adjectives – bowed and barren, that echo and bounce up and down the poem, that last line, There's much more to this than appears on screen, the other half is written in the readers head.

TailorSTATELY – Lots of imagery, lots of poetic description, an allegorical story and once more effortless progression of thought – within the narrative this time – everything you want from a poem. You create a melancholic mood and then prick it with spikes of turmoil. I kept wondering – does the character know/think/hope that Venus will appear in the East by morning?

YesNo - For me the clear winner. A beautiful poem about beauty. No need to analyse. Kudos for the myrtle and roses reference.

GG. One day I'll understand every obscure reference you bring along. I think I got about half of them here. Made me laugh though – you and Venus de Milo eh ?


Congratulations Yesno

[Melanie]

Congrats YesNo! Very lovely. It's a keeper.
prendrelemick, the VENUS subject was so versatile and fun!
And thank you for the critique. You're right about "barren of". I think "minimizing" would have been better and will edit that. But "bowed" means "head bent down out of submission, shame, respect, or greeting"...so since "submission" is what I was going for, I think I'll leave that one. Thanks for taking the time to help.

[YesNo]

Thanks, prendrelemick! And Melanie!

The next subject is


Diana

This could be either the Goddess or the Princess.


Deadline: September 16, about 3 weeks.

[prendrelemick]

Melanie.

Hang on a minute. I meant I liked "barren" In fact it was almost the key to my understanding of your intention (so I thought) because of the irony it carried in describing a"Goddess of fertility", which emphasised the irony of her being naked but for her face, which is something I hadn't considered before. But that's just me.

[tailor STATELY]

Congratulations YesNo!; and thank you prendrelemick.

This was a fun subject. On to the next.

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

[Melanie]

Hang on a minute. I meant I liked "barren"

oh, well, back to the drawing board :biggrin5:

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

...YesNo - For me the clear winner. A beautiful poem about beauty. No need to analyse. Kudos for the myrtle and roses reference.

GG. One day I'll understand every obscure reference you bring along. I think I got about half of them here. Made me laugh though – you and Venus de Milo eh ?
...

Congratulations YesNo! that is nice work.


Haha! Mick, I'll spare you the trouble...

“Gilliatt” = that’s me
“Oh Venus my love let us depart de Milo” = you got it; Venus de Milo
“land of the free”, = Good ole U.S.of A.
“2nd to amend” = 2nd Amendment to the Constitution, you know; the whole bearing of arms business.
“Alexandros” = Alexandros of Antioch credited for sculpting Venus de Milo

“Remington the sculptor will fit you with arms” = double meaning, either Frederick Remington notable sculptor and painter of western U.S themes or Remington Arms gun manufacturer
“(aside) Do you think she’ll use her left or her right?” = we’ll never know, would she have been a “righty” or a “south paw”?
“perky charms.” = …well, you get the idea.

Carry on with YesNo's next challenge...

[Pendragon]

Congrats, YesNo! And thanks for the compliment, Prendelmick!

Diana Dances

In the moonlight she dances, her beauty entrances
Her bow now forgotten lies on the soft mossy floor
Tomorrow another hunt will come, tonight shes just having fun
Her hair like a gold shower as she whirls once more

I saw her as if in a dream, tell why did it really seem
That her partner was a white hind on little deer feet?
A lovely virgin goddess, whom no man will ever caress
Why is it that the unavailable are the girls that I meet?

Somehow she sees me peep, it makes her feet skip a beat
Like lightning an arrow comes sailing my way
I feel the bite of deadly steel, is this how my death will feel
Then I wake from my dreaming, it's the dawning of day

Pendragon
© 8/27/2013

[Dark Muse]

Sister Moon

Beauty stalks through the night
there is winter within her eyes,
and once she placed her heart
upon the altar of sacrifice
in exchange for her freedom.

Now her aim is always true,
with an arrow which never misses,
slicing through the moonlight,
but it is not death she chases after,
she surrounds herself with life.

Love to her is as distant and
ephemeral as the four winds
of which she sometimes brings
hither at her command, and in truth
she carries vengeance with her.

She bestows shelter to the poor
lost souls, the undefended,
she is a mother to the motherless
fearless but not without compassion.

[prendrelemick]

The Chase.


Diana with her beau in hand,
Driven by Silenus,
Driven down into the underpass,
Pursued by the hounds she bred,
Down to the gates of Hades.

The steel and Concrete,
Did not part for her,
But the impact of the crash raised her up,
And through Media's intercession,
She now sits among the immortals.

[Melanie]

DIANAS

In the primeval forests of West Africa
Dwell the beautiful Diana primates
Named for the Roman Goddess Diana
Endangerment is their fate.

From Cote d'lvoire, to the Sierra Leone
To west of the river Sassandra
Hunters and loggers cause massive destruction
Of habitat's panorama.

The fate of Dianas, not just supposition
Suspended in genetic hourglasses
Let not our efforts be posthumous ambitions
Nor like Kings counting our losses.

[Nick Capozzoli]

I'll post the following poem about Diana by Ben Jonson (from Cynthia's Revels, just to provide us
with something to compare our efforts to:

Hymn to Diana

Queen and huntress, chaste and fair,
Now the sun is laid to sleep,
Seated in thy silver chair
State in wonted manner keep:
Hesperus entreats thy light,
Goddess excellently bright.

Earth, let not thy envious shade
Dare itself to interpose;
Cynthia's shining orb was made
Heaven to clear, when day did close;
Bless us then with wished sight,
Goddess excellently bright.

Lay thy bow of pearl apart,
And thy crystal shining quiver;
Give unto the flying hart
Space to breathe, how short soever,
Thou that mak'st a day of night,
Goddess excellently bright.

[tailor STATELY]

Riotous at Ephesus (ref: KJV - Acts 19: 23-41)

Cyrus the Great of old might have given
pause, noting the manicured Temple grounds -
spacious lawns; robed women clothed in white,
men robed in black assembled before the theater
Who would ever grasp the Grecian mind ?

Paulus overshadows all that is Ephesus
It is he whom Demetrius derides -
incites the assemblage to chant as a mob
"Great is Diana of the Ephesians!"
two hours towards the downhearted
disciples; Paulus' discourse is stayed

Perhaps Paulus turns in reflection: It's a
Pyrrhic victory, o' Demetrius, albeit rashly won
How much more is silver than salvation
thrice hypocrite? HIS righteousness is near


9/2/2013 r.9/3/2013 r.9/4/2013iv (tyM!) r.9/5/2013

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

[YesNo]

It looks like the time is up. Thank you for the entries!

Pendragon: I understand Diana can be hostile to those finding her in the forest. It's a good thing it was only a dream.

Dark Muse: The first stanza had her sacrifice her heart for her freedom, however, the last stanza showed that she did not sacrifice her compassion.

prendrelemick: I liked the chase idea connecting the Goddess and the Princess. I hadn't thought of that, and now that is how I see them both.

Melanie: This was the first time I heard of the Diana primates and I hope extinction is not near for them.

tailor STATELY: A nice approach to Diana from the position of a conflict between Demetrius and Paul. Demetrius using the crowd against Paul makes me think he deserved to lose.

And, thanks, Nick Capozzoli for the Ben Jonson poem. It is good to see what others have done with the theme.

I liked all of them. I am amazed at how different they were.

The winner is Dark Muse.

The idea of sacrificing one's heart without losing one's compassion stands out for me.

[Melanie]

Congratulations Dark Muse!! That line stood out for me too...nicely done.

It was an interesting subject YesNo. The entries were all great!

[Dark Muse]

Thank you very much.

I will have the next subject soon

[tailor STATELY]

Congratulations Dark Muse !

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

[Dark Muse]

Ok, next subject is Echo

Deadline Oct. 15

[Pendragon]

Echoes From the Edge: Dementia

Haunting echoes everywhere…
No! Please stop! Stop it!
For God’s sake go ‘way!
No, please, oh God! Can’t take it!
Make it stop!
Can’t stand it anymore!
Images, haunting images. Faces. FACES!
Make ‘em go ‘way!
No! Stop! No more of your gibbering, echoing voices!
Lemme ‘lone, oh God! Lemme ‘lone!
The room is spinning—the air echoes pain
I didn’t do it, I tell ya! It wasn’t me!
Haunt me no more, I swear I didn’t do it!
The echoes tell lies! The echoes tell lies, damn it!
Oh God, where do these things come from?
VOICES! ECHOING VOICES!
Get out! Out, or by God, I’ll kill you!
Please, just lemme ‘lone? Please?
Dear God, what’s all this red stuff? Ketch-ketch-ketchup?
I think I’m gonna be sick…
I want my mommy.
Please?
Mommy, where are you?

Pendragon








If this one disturbs you, it is intended to. I knew a friend who was schizophrenic. He never harmed anyone that I know of, but he fully thought he had murdered someone, and the voices in his head finally took him to suicide. This one is a trip into his mind. In pace, requiescant. Silentio consolationem vestram, big guy. You were a bit different, but had a golden heart.

[cacian]

it echos
the silence
when you listen
to it
it lances
up and down
and bounces.
to the sound it's a trance
silent is but ounced.

[YesNo]

Oblivion and Bliss,
They intertwine and kiss.
She weeps into his empty heart
That echoes nothing as they part
But loneliness.

Tonight some other takes her place.
Oblivion forgets her face.
She'd save his heart, but he had none.
He whines like an abandoned one
With each caress.

[Pendragon]

Bump!

[Melanie]

Ok, next subject is Echo. Deadline Oct. 15

Echo Of A Distant Song

abstract fragments of life
in chromatic harmony
call to me from distant shores
on melodic memories

amplitude breathes life
into musical passages
of richness and complexity
in patterns of passion

from the east to the west
a flute's vibrations on air
soft rhythm of a distant drum
echoes a language of love

[prendrelemick]

Echo

Everything you shout, out out
I will turn about, out out
Reflections of the Earth, Earth Earth
A stutter in reverse.



verse

verse

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

The Echo Chamber

Bathed in her pixilated glow, the Candy Crusher sits.
Half asleep I contemplate, twenty years of wedded blitz.
While counting my sheep jumping, merrily over fences,
the queen’s nagging barrage, suddenly commences:
“Did you take the trash out?”
Did I take the trash out?
“Go down and get me Klondike bar”
I go down and fetch her Klondike bar
“Go sleep in the guest room, you’re beginning to stink”
Ahhh, only one voice in the guest room, now where was I?...51 I think.

[Dark Muse]

Ok this one was almost impossible to judge. All these poems were great, and I loved each one of them. But nonetheless a winner had to be choosen, but each of these poems were deserving of winning.


cacian

A very powerful poem. I loved the way in which you were able to capture the feeling of silence, and the sound of an echo within words.

YesNo

A stunning poem, I really enjoyed the way in which you interpreted the subject. Very moving and sad, and quite beautiful.

Melanie

This is truly a wonderful work. Such beautiful and elegant imagery. It captured the essence of sound very well. There were some fantastic lines within this poem.

prendrelemick

Very clever. I thought it was great the way in which you actually incorporated the echo effect within the verse.

Gilliatt Gurgle

Quite a humorous take upon the subject. I enjoyed the originality of the idea. I thought it was a fun poem, and enjoyed reading.

And the winner is....


Pendragon

You know I love this one! It is indeed quite disturbering, deliciously so. I very much enjoyed the haunting journey into madness which this poem lead me into. It had a very Poe like feel to it.

[cacian]

Dark Muse thank you.
Pendragon congratulations !!!

[Pendragon]

Sorry I'm late with this acceptance of the win, thanks Dark Muse. My mother broke her hip and is in the hospital with bed sores and dementia. Prayers, well wishes, and moments of silence appreciated. Thanks in advance.

Let's make the next subject: Graveyards, deadline November 1st, All Hallows Day!

[Dark Muse]

Grave Angel

My heart begins to decompose
at the altar of my stone angel,
coldly he watches without a sound,
no warmth to offer, nor smile to give,
and his eyes are accusing condemnation.

By piecemeal I decompose,
as the Autumnal leaves
that whorl around my feet,
among the dying flowers once
left behind by the well meaning,
leaving their fragile transient gifts
for their own fugacious memory.

Parts of me are swept away
within this disintegrating foliage,
and slowly I am sinking down
to rejoin the earth yawning at my feet,
it is the indifference of my angel in stone,
my grave guardian that draws my life away.

Perhaps echoes of my presence will remain,
diffused through this graveyard, where my heart
was first buried, where my soul was first stolen,
it is my curse that even as nothing else is left of me,
I will be denied the endless sleep
and remain bound haunting this hallowed ground
where he perpetually remains indifferent
to my plight.

[YesNo]

The moon was watching overhead
Providing us some light.
We came to satirize the dead,
Spray-paint their gravestones bright.

We knew nobody followed us.
We've done this every year.
Those graves are old. Who'd make a fuss?
We're young and had no fear.

Before we marked each stone we read
The name and dates thereon.
We rushed among the ancient dead
And sprayed them and were gone.

At last we saw an open grave
And tombstone on the ground.
We read our names. A quick breeze gave
A freakish, laughing sound.

Was someone messing with our minds?
Had we at last got caught?
We didn't wait. Our young behinds
Went running at the thought.

When morning came we had to see
That new made grave again.
It wasn't there, no trace, nowhere.
We let the graveyard win.

[prendrelemick]

Dawn Shields .
born. June 19th 1964
found March 8th 1968

Up in the Graveyard plying our trade,
We fence in all weathers till the fence it is made,
We swing our steel hammers banging in nails,
driving in posts and chainsawing rails,
We're rough and we're tough - or act like we are,
Laughing too loudly, our language is raw.

That's where I found little Dawn's grave ,
And remembered the child no one could save,
There by my feet she was laid in the ground,
No death was recorded, just when she was found,
I felt a cold shudder go up through my spine,
I was transported back to when I was nine,
I remembered my dad seaching with others,
Remembered the tears on the face of her brothers,
Remembered her picture grainy and blurred,
The newspaper headlines shouting the word,
She was three, she was pretty, with blonde curly hair,
Her mum turned her back, she was no longer there,
A moment's distraction, so heavy the price,
She was in the canal under the ice,
Nothing to do but wait for the thaw,
She was found in the spring 10 yards from her door.

I told her sad story to some of the lads,
It went very quiet - most of us were dads,
And looking at gravestones, rows upon rows,
We began to remember what every man knows,
Each grave held a story that ended in death,
As our's would end too at our last mortal breath,
The rest of the day we worked quietly on,
Shouting and swearing suddenly seemed wrong.

[Melanie]

A Menu To Die For

Welcome to the Graveyard Tavern
A smoky den for shady patrons.
Order a Gravedigger Burger and Brew
With Zombie Sauce and Barbecue.

Buffalo Bones marinated in bitters
And a lethal dose of Ghost Chili Peppers.
Laughter, madness, mischief, and curses
Beware, the taxis outside are hearses!

[Pendragon]

And time! Put down your mouse and laptop!

DarkMuse Great start, one of my favorite songs is "Concrete Angel", dark and mysterious as usual!

YesNo. If you do not know what a "death fetch" is, look it up. A chilling, slightly humorous dealing with precognition of death.

prendrelemick A sad little poem that brings tears to the eyes. Haunting!

Melanie I enjoyed this light-hearted look at the subject, turning the "Graveyard" into a pub!



But one winner: (Drumroll. please)


prendrelemick Beautiful poetry, and quite delightful!

[Dark Muse]

And time! Put down your mouse and laptop!

DarkMuse Great start, one of my favorite songs is "Concrete Angel", dark and mysterious as usual!



Concrete Angel is one of my boyfriend's favorite songs.

Congrats prendrelemick

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

Well done my friend. Congrats
Nice contributions from all.

[Melanie]

prendrelemick, I was so touched by your poem and your delivery was masterful. I liked the personal touch.

[prendrelemick]

Thanks. There's no doubt about it - real experiences make better poetry.



Next subject is A Window- metaphorical, actual, symbolic, the view through it or whatever.

[slipee]

As seen in Catalogue

The eye on the division
of outside and in
The narrator of both worlds
with a sill for a chin
Within hours and angles
perceptions will change
both sun-room and streetlight
stories are framed
The sun gives permission
of how much to hint
the beholder's reflection
and how ghostly a tint
Without preference or opinion
be it open or closed
Just don't be complacent
when there's kids with a hose

[Pendragon]

THE WINDOW

Every evening it is the same:
Pad, pad, pad, pad—
back and forth in front of the window
of his upstairs study.
I ask him what he thinks he’s doing.
“Looking for your mother!” he replies somewhat testily.
“Dad”, I remind him gently,
“Mom’s been dead for nearly five years.”
His reply is just an explosive bark.
Pad, pad, pad, pad.
That night, dad dies in his sleep.
After the funeral, I return to the house
to tidy up a few loose ends.
As I enter the upstairs study,
I hear a sickeningly familiar sound:
Pad, pad, pad, pad.
My God! Will he never be at rest?

Pendagon

[YesNo]

Advice is freely offered me
On why to change my hard-won ways.
Some think they see what I can't see
And jabber on and on for days.

It's safe inside. I like the night.
Well-wishers praise a window for
The way it lets in air and light.
Tomorrow, they'll suggest a door.

[Dark Muse]

Visiting Hours

I watch you from behind the glass,
so close, and yet achingly out of reach,
and all I wish is to touch you,
but these barriers remain between us,
unbreakable, but they cannot sever
the connection we share,
we can feel each other standing on separate sides,
but still untied, and while the world
continues to bustle past around us,
I find myself alone but for you,
and I feel the weight of my helplessness
you know I would do anything to take away
your pain, to take you away from this place,
but now all I can do is watch, and wait,
and know you know that I am here.

[cacian]

it slams
and close
opens and pose
fresh air is froze
when winter blows
but rain infers through
pane it throws.
window to hope
is light to rose
weather permit
it lures
the sun to merse
and derse
against the glass
the frame it likes.

[slipee]

Some really great poetry coming out this round! Enjoying the different approaches very much :)

[cacian]

what is the deadline prendrelemick?:)

[prendrelemick]

eerm shall we say a week...ish

[prendrelemick]

Ok, first things first, DARK MUSE is the winner. Sometimes her stuff is too plain for me -I like a bit of flowery poesy- but this was spot on. The matter of fact language enhanced the strong emotional content. Lines like ;-

we can feel each other standing on separate sides,
but still untied, and while the world
continues to bustle past around us,

were the clincher for me. (should that be united?)

Pendragon once again had a strong entry, good penmanship as usual, but not as emotionally moving as the above- inspite of the subject.

Slipee was going to be the winner when I first read it, because of the unusual approach - having the window itself -its abilities and foibles -as the subject was clever, but just pipped by dark muse this time.

Yesno went a little beyond my comprehension, I think I got her angle after a few re-reads - I like the way her mind works.

cacian went way beyond my comprehension, but I understand that her poetry is about sounds and shapes rather than comprehension and I like the way she sticks to what she wants to do.


Congratulations Dark Muse.

[cacian]

prendrelemick thank you.
Congratulations Dark Muse,

[Dark Muse]

Thank you very much, I will think up a good new subject soon

[Dark Muse]

Next Subject is Hearth/Fireplace

Deadline Dec. 1

[YesNo]

The center of the home, the hearth,
Is warm though hearts don't care
And let their mouths slip into rage
To bother loved ones there.

[prendrelemick]

Fuel poverty

Sitting by the hearth,
The cat and me,
Both lost in silent reverie.

Both thinking,
It would be better on the whole,
If we could afford some coal.

[cacian]

hearth
the center
of heat
caught between the sheets
of ember and ash
fire shots and stach
a log burning ganashe
winter feels splashed.

[Dark Muse]

Thank you everyone who entered.

YesNo: An interesting take on the subject, though I am not sure I entirely understand it. It does bring to mind the holidays and the friction and tension which often arises within many families when they do all gather together.

prendrelemick: A somewhat darkly funny poem which I also think does also portray a stark reality.

And the winner is.....

cacian: A beautiful and vivid poem. It was very evocative of the senses, and it created a wonderful image. It really captured the essence of the fire, as well as the warmth, and romanticism of sitting before a crackling fire.

[cacian]

Dark Muse thank you very much I was not expecting this. :)

ok my next subject entry is:

santa claus

look forward to reading all entries!!!:wave:

[YesNo]

Although some claim the evidence
For Santa Claus is slim,
No one would ever use that term
When they're describing him.

He's crimson, bearded, jolly, plump
And works on Christmas eve.
Most children like him well enough,
See presents and believe.

But when they think they're rational,
Or feisty, they will scorn
The thought that Santa ever gave
That stuff on Christmas morn.

Some relatives will tell them things,
Hint mistletoe might fade,
Say lovers just need therapy
And fruit cakes aren't well made.

They'll state that Santa isn't real.
They'll tell your children, too.
They caught the guy that mommy kissed
Beside the furnace flue.

Still Santa gives these naughty ones
More presents than he should.
It's all made-up, a fairy tale:
He can't tell which are good.

[jajdude]

Santa Claus, he never was, he comes with chimneys and with flaws.
He slides down chutes, he wears red boots, he flies around without a sound.

I tell you, Santa Claus, he never was.

He sees you when you're sleeping..

Santa Claus, he never was.

He knows when you're awake..

He never was, and just because the children dream,
He must be not what he seems.

If you're bad or good, it matters none,
He's here to stay, and it's all fun.

For goodness sake.

[Pendragon]

Get Real, Santa

Well he knows who's naughty and he knows who's nice
Sounds like he works for Big Brother as a NSC spy
He creeps down your chimney, every chimney in the Nation
Sounds to me a lot like a home invasion
Always ringing bells at strip malls, begging for some change
Which has all the homeless up the alley in a fighting rage
Always seems to have some little kid setting on his lap
Are we certain he isn't in to all that pedophile crap?
Kids around the world send letters to this guy
When Christmas brings disappointment they have a good cry
Then just when you think things couldn't get any more surreal
You find out that after all this loser isn't real
Red and white clad fake, what is the fuss all about
The Government will get you if you don't watch out!

Pendragon (C) December 5, 2013

[cacian]

oh my!!! totally nearly forgotten about this contest. apologies guys.
here is the deliberation:

YesNo: an interesting account on santa claus very insightfull and true to life.
the first stanza id my favourite.:)

jajdude: brilliant opening lines and a lot of fun to read. some catchy phrases too.

Pendragon:
''Always seems to have some little kid setting on his lap
Are we certain he isn't in to all that pedophile crap?''

haha and so true I thought it too and many times. a great piece well done.

and the winner is........
jajdude well done!!!

[cacian]

bump
can either YesNo or Pendragon take over this contest please. I do not think jajdude is around.
thanks!!!

[Pendragon]

OK I'll set the next subject: Mars

now you chose for your poem either the planet or the god!

Ends: Jan 31st

[miyako73]

How about as a chocolate bar?

[cacian]

OK I'll set the next subject: Mars

now you chose for your poem either the planet or the god!

Ends: Jan 31st

Pendragon thank you and what a cool subject :)

[YesNo]

The radiation knocked it out.
Its continents don't move about.
Magnetosphere? It hasn't any.
It's like the moon and likely many
Other places we might try
To look for life and wonder why
We move alone through empty space,
A wondrous, living, blessed place.

[Pendragon]

How about as a chocolate bar?

Go for it! Forgot about that one! :D

[cacian]

mars
descriptive to fars
harmonious to last
flying past is mast
the moon is public cast

[jajdude]

Mars bars are tasty, and the planet must be tasty too.
I listened to David Bowie, and he said so.

I imagine a planet ripe with incident, sad with regret.

Mars is loaded with fragments, shrapnel, dust.
It must be, all hail the incoming beings, all red.

Then when we concur this must be so.
Planets align and so on, Mars stands tall.
It takes its place as a wonder.
I like how it does that.

[Dark Muse]

Mars: War God

Castles topple
with a twitch
of his finger,
when he smiles
thousands die,
his laughter
is a massacre,
rivers of blood
dance within his eyes,
every heart beat
is a warriors battle cry,
the world is a chessboard
laid out at his feet,
with delight
he topples
pawns and kings alike
with the toe of his boot,
but even he
grows weary of this game
and when he yawns
nations crumble
and fall.

[prendrelemick]

I'm working on something for this, should be ready soon.

[prendrelemick]

Venus and Mars. (Apologies to Homer)

Venus gave Mars a look,
That was so very flirty,
Her marriage vows she forsook,
And they got down and dirty.

Vulcan was her husband lame,
He trapped them in a net,
They couldn't hide their naked shame,
And Mars began to fret.

"Alas, my love I am enchained,
Tight to your peerless breast,
My lusty panting is constrained,
My face it is compressed.

This net has squeezed us in its clutch,
And stilled our passion's throes,
But I would not mind half so much,
If I could scratch my nose.”

[Pendragon]

Times up!! In reality, I must declare Prendrelmick the winner, as you gotta love a poem that retells a genuine mythological story about the god Mars! Great job everyone!

God Bless

Pen

[prendrelemick]

Thanks Pen.

I suppose the next subject will have to be Valentine's day

[YesNo]

I dare not mock my valentine.
She's sweet and cute and true.
For if I do she might say, "Fine.
Some other boy will bring me wine
And take me out to dance and dine
Then play the whole night through."

[prendrelemick]

Ok, yesno looks like you 're up. I liked the phrase "to dance and dine," in particular.

[YesNo]

Thanks! The competition was severe.

The next topic is happiness.

The tentative deadline is April 15th.

[Dark Muse]

Happiness

It flits upon moth wings,
elusive, and frightfully delicate,
yet possessed by stolid resolve,
at rare moments I may grasp it
within my hands, frantically at first
I can feel its struggles for freedom,
with a thousand
miniscule heart beats
that send thrills throughout my nerve endings,
but if held too tightly,
kept too long,
it will begin to suffocate
dying slowly,
it must be released,
but even as it begins to slip away,
there remains the residue
of its presence,
and it becomes absorbed within my pores.

[prendrelemick]

Happiness is...

A pig in a wallow,
A slug on a cabbage,
A duck in the rain,
A trip without baggage.

A hen with a worm
A horse at his hay
A field with a gate
Children at play.

A flower in a meadow
A cat with a purr
A leaf in the sun
A spoon with a stir

A book with a story
A poem when it rhymes
A play with a plot
A song of old times

A man with his slippers
A bright coin to spend,
A child with its mother
And a list with an end.

[Pendragon]

Happiness comes
When you know some people love you
When those that don't don't matter
When you put the past behind you
When you look to the future
Content where ever you are...

[2X2E5]

Make Momma Happy

Happiness comes at the bottom of a Bourbon bottle,
giving reason to leave your therapist at full-throttle.
Dodging nurses and tackling cops, taking your wallet,
and smashing it on Liquor store counter tops.
Caught up in a hold up, squeezing a cashier's tit,
say hi to your mom - through the news - because she's
gonna flip -
pancakes on the grill, for when you come home,
cause she's sweating excitement about your new bottle
of
Bourbon.

[Pendragon]

Attention required!

[cacian]

Oops let me squeeze this in ahah

happiness
comes and goes
and it rather throws
one minute I am rose
and the next I am lows
I wish it to goes
i'd rather smile
and loads
stable natural
flows
better then I wows
happy now
you knows
I need you not
so doze!

[YesNo]

I will announce a winner tomorrow morning.

[YesNo]

Time is up.

Dark Muse: I liked the idea of releasing happiness so it doesn't suffocate.

prendrelemick: The list with an end is something that would give me happiness. My list of things to do just grows at the moment. Nice meter and rhyme.

Pendragon: That sounds like good advice especially about knowing when it doesn't matter.

2X2E5: That was an unusual description of bringing home something momma wants that she probably shouldn't.

cacian: I liked the second to the last line "I need you not". This sounds like the celebration of happiness after a breakup.

Thank you for all the entries. They were all very different and enjoyable.

The winner is 2X2E5.

[2X2E5]

Thanks YesNo :)

The next subject is...Crooked Teeth.
Deadline is May 11th.

[YesNo]

My crooked teeth
Above beneath
My opened mouth
Both north and south
Or east and west
When getting rest
Don't make me whine.
I chew just fine.

[colb2]

The few that hang
Slant like a fang
Some broke in two
Stuck in with glue
And oh' the stench
Makes me tummy wrench
They poke my cheek
MY MOUTH HAS A LEAK!

[2X2E5]

Time is up!

YesNo: First time I read it I enjoyed it very much, reading it a fourth and fifth time I still admire and found the north/south/east/west original and funny.

colb2: I'm a sucker for rhyming schemes, so I enjoyed the song like feel and the humour of the poem, with a raw touch "stuck in with glue.

Thank you both for your submissions! I enjoyed them both.

The winner of this challenge is...colb2! Congratulations!

[colb2]

Thankyou 2x I will post subject in the morning as I plan to think of a good one

[colb2]

Subject is "Creepy crawlers"
Deadline is 6/03

[Dark Muse]

Arachne

I am spellbound
by her savage beauty,
and I am rendered helpless
while she sews me up,
pieces of me woven
into her thread,
deep down I know
all I want is to become
closer to her,
but soon I begin to realize
I cannot move,
and my breath
is cut short,
the pain is searing
through me,
but I just thought
she looked so alone,
so in need
of a little companionship,
but she'll not be content
until she has drank
the last drop
of my soul.

[YesNo]

Little Miss Muffet
Decided to rough it,
Invited a spider to play.
The spider sent Crawler
A creep who would haul her,
Haul our Miss Muffet away.

[oddball]

Snakes, and snails, and scorpions
Spiders, centipedes, and worms
Crawling across the open grave
All giving me the squirms!
Get me a pack of rat poison
(Damn right! They are here as well!)
Maybe a shot of flaming gasoline
Would send them back to hell!

[colb2]

The contest will close in one week

[Pendragon]

Actually, this one is me. My account had problems, long story. Oddball no loner exists, it was just me, Pendragon, trying to figure out what I did with my password....


Snakes, and snails, and scorpions
Spiders, centipedes, and worms
Crawling across the open grave
All giving me the squirms!
Get me a pack of rat poison
(Damn right! They are here as well!)
Maybe a shot of flaming gasoline
Would send them back to hell!

[Melanie]

Creepy Crawlers

Beware the creepiest crawlers of all
spidering through our personal space
harvesting email addresses for spam
indexing our downloads, stalking our steps
crawling through websites a page at a time

Spiders, Web Crawlers, and Bots by name
grinning and spinning their elaborate webs
toss the Raid, "killer apps", and traps
though through a Firewall they cannot pass
Web Crawlers then shall feel the burn

[colb2]

Great poems everyone but unfortunately one winner.. Melanie, the throne is yours!

[Melanie]

Thank you colb. You picked a fun subject.
Okay, next subject is: The Last One...or...The Last Time
Deadline is June 26

[Pendragon]

A Addict's Prayer

Lord, let this cigarette be my last one
Let this smoke filled moment be the last time
I already find it hard to breathe sometimes
Cancer could be in my future if I do not gain control
Let this match be the last one
Last time I light up a Marlboro Ultra-Lite
Forgiveness finds me every time I ask
But let this tired old prayer be answered
Even if it be the last one and last time I pray...

Pendragon
(C) 6/6/2014

[YesNo]

1

The last time that I saw you there
You had a pizza in your hands
Then crossed the street to eat somewhere.
You said your boyfriend understands.
I doubt he does. Just wait and see.
When he's with you he'll think of me.

2

The last time that I sensed you there
I carried pizza in my hand.
I crossed the street to eat somewhere.
My boyfriend didn't understand
And nor do you. Just wait and see.
You never will get over me.

[Dark Muse]

The Last Goodbye

Stale smoke rings hover heavy in the air
while we lie strewn about the remains
of our shame, all the broken promises,
the lies we tell ourselves, each other.

But we both know this cannot go on,
it is destined for failure, and we where made
to destroy each other, beautifully, and agonizingly,
somewhere inside the need to survive overrides
the primal satisfaction of two hungry bodies.

This was our final coda and there is nothing
left to do but say our goodbyes if we both wish
to emerge still alive with our sanity minimally intact,

We both understood when by some fallacy of nature
our eyes met across miles of impossibility,
with a feeling like deja vu inevitably
it would come to this, like strangers passing
on different trains in the end all we could do
was watch the other finitely drift away.

[Melanie]

Okay, next subject is: The Last One...or...The Last Time
Deadline is June 26
Just a friendly reminder, only one week left!
The poems of Pendragon, YesNo, and Dark Muse are all excellent examples of this subject.
Come one, come all

[prendrelemick]

Childhood sweetheart

That was the last time,
When I held your hand,
Our thumbs caressing,
Our breathing calmed,
Without words
or the need for them
Contented in the moment,
In each other.
Then came the World
And we parted.

[cacian]

the last time
I saw
you
it felt
like a dream,
but I knew
you were
real,
and now
you are here
time feels
clear,
not a cloud in the horizon
nears,
the sky
above you
revere
to see
your presence
always
appear,
everyday to a minute
dear,
without you
life is tear.

[Melanie]

Thank you for your patience and I apologize for the delay. I'm impressed with all of these poems as a whole. In fact, that's one reason this took me so long. I liked them all and had a hard time deciding on a winner.

Pendaragon - I like personal expression in poetry and this one touched me. Life is hard and you express the frustration with clarity in this wonderful poem in the unique form of a prayer. Well executed.

YesNo - Very clever the way you used nearly identical, yet very different, stanzas. The sting is in the tail…"you never will get over me". Good job.

Dark Muse - the opening and ending are filled with poetic imagery that really set the mood, "Stale smoke rings hover heavy in the air while we lie strewn about the remains of our shame" caught my interest right way…and…"like strangers passing on different trains in the end all we could do was watch the other finitely drift away." Or did you mean "infinitely"? "Infinitely" conjures up an image that seems to work well with "drifting away", whereas "finite" seems so sudden. No?

Prendrelemick - this is so tenderly written that I could feel the love between the two of you, so sweet, and then BAM, the "world" packs quite a punch in just one word. Well done.

Cacian - nice flow of thoughts and words

…and the winner is Pendragon!

.

[Pendragon]

Thank you! As this is July, the subject will be: Weird Family Vacations! End of the month deadline!

[YesNo]

I wonder why the summer visits earth.
My parents said I must go on vacation.
With them? They're flying off to southern Spain
To see the beaches, "check out Spanish cuties":
My mother tends to gross me out the most.
I'm far too young to settle down and marry.
She wants a grandkid. Well, she should know how
To get a man confused and make a baby.
My dad then interrupted our debate
And I felt even more chained to my fate.

It's not that I don't like the girls. I do.
Though some I know are hardly worth the liking.
There is Janine who treats me well enough
And then there's Tricia, lovely from behind
And Phyllis, well, she's almost over sweet
And Tanya from the front can blow your mind.
My friends say I'm too picky and they're right.
Most any girl would do for most of them.
For me I want a girl who hasn't been
Enchanted by so many other men.

We got to Spain. I gave it my best shot.
"The internet don't work here," I complained.
My mom said if I didn't get a life
She'd take away my tablet on the spot.
And that was how the first week over there
Was spent debating while I stayed inside.
I told my mom her bathing suit should show
A little more since these were Spanish guys.
My dad said something that I won't repeat,
But we were civil when we went to eat.

The second week went slower than the first.
My parents would explore the tourist sites.
I sometimes went into the lobby where
A senorita who was working there
Said, like my mom, that I should get a life
Except her English wasn't quite as good.
She wasn't that bad looking, some might say,
But now we have to catch the plane and go.
My parents said that Spain was really great,
"We left him in his room and partied late."

[Adolescent09]

Festooned Ferrari

I once rented a ferrari when the winter took off its mascara.
It rode as a wave, lithe and supple on Sicily's shores,
Birds came and booed at the ride with their white stuff
but rain droplets were a panacea to organic droplet woes.
I once rented a ferrari during the summer Solstice.
The radiance of my ride attracted the chicks as the
puddle splash from my tires doused their feathers.
Oh, you thought I was talking about those chicks?
Either the radiance of red blinds them during the summer solstice
or they are Ferrariaphobic.
I once rented a Ferrari and then crashed it at my girl's place
The axioms of modern slang have been bent to the point that
I can intend to mean it was parked in the driveway as opposed to
sticking out of her front living room.
I once rented a four door ferrari and had a foursome with my family.
Four separate beds four separate Hotels at a resort you sickos!!
Gosh!
I once rented a ferrari and realized it was the figment of my fingers
with the real red thing popping up in the literature network forum ad sidebar.
I will one day rent a ferrari and realize that driving it is nowhere near as
fun as writing about renting it.

[tailor STATELY]

bump

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

[ampoule]

I had to go somewhere so it might as well be here,
Scooping out the memories of another crazy year,
All laid out upon the bed, all the categories,
Touching my emotions, remembering the stories.
Something fluttered to the floor I did not recognize,
I picked it up, smiled at first, then I realized,
It was that picture of your back as you went out the door,
Leaving me so all alone just like I was before.



ampoule, September Twenty Ninth, TwoThousandFourteen

[Pendragon]

And the winner is: (drumroll, please!) http://s1326.photobucket.com/user/MortimerGraves/media/Photos/drumroll_zps96eac53c.gif.html Adolescent09! That first line grabs you and the poem doesn't let go until the end! Congrats!

[ampoule]

Will Adolescent09 be making a choice soon?

[ampoule]

You guys are making me feel 'bad'......like I'm killing the threads. :(

[cacian]

You guys are making me feel 'bad'......like I'm killing the threads. :(

ampoule how about you start a new topic.
suggest a topic and will post our entries:)

[ampoule]

Okay, just to tide us over until Adolescent09 comes back. Let's try 'mirror on the wall'.


DEADLINE: NOVEMBER 15th

[Pendragon]

The mirror on the wall is deceitful
It mocks my tears and laughs at my sorrow
Once a reflection of a successful man
It now shows one racked with the pain
Of the things I find impossible to understand
Mirror. Mirror on the wall
Is life worth living after all?

[cacian]

mirror on the wall
triggers with the force
that when lying on the floor
I shant see it at all.

[YesNo]

The mirror on the wall is black
Obsidian, reflecting what?
But I still stare and it stares back
With affirmations trapped by “but”.

Though some would say there’s nothing there,
No need to fear what’s dead and dark,
But others know and say, “Don’t stare!
Don’t tempt it to come leave its mark.”

[ampoule]

Oh my, these are wonderful.

[Pendragon]

Bump-bump! :)

[Dark Muse]

The Gilded Mirror

Ostentatiously bedecked
in golden frame
which proves to be naught
but gilded facade,
its shimmering surface
whispers only lies and deceit.

Entrancing the vain
lavishing in seeing themselves
complimented by such gaudy
trimmings, their own beauty
may so easily wear away
as the varnish that so
impresses them with
the shine of false affluence.

They pray at this altar
to which they sell away
their souls, and never notice
the decay which starts to crack
around their edges as the glass
becomes dingy, and its filigree
erodes, from gold to gray-green.

[cacian]

judges anyone this is long overdue??!

[ampoule]

The mirror on the wall is deceitful
It mocks my tears and laughs at my sorrow
Once a reflection of a successful man
It now shows one racked with the pain
Of the things I find impossible to understand
Mirror. Mirror on the wall
Is life worth living after all?

I'm late, I'm late....I beg your forgiveness. I choose Pendragon. Lately my mirror scares me. I loved all of the entries. Thank you all.

[Pendragon]

Thanks, Lady Amp!

Subject for net contest: Tis the Season

Deadline December 31

Good hunting!

[YesNo]

It’s the season again when the presents appear
But I have delayed like I have every year.
What should I give her? How would I know?
Keep the receipts is the best way to go.
A gift card might work, but she wants me to guess,
Telepathically pick out her choice from the mess.
And what do I want to be under the tree?
Not much. Maybe food and some warm company.
She tells me that I am the worst of the lot.
There’s nothing to give me that I haven’t got.
Giving and getting are harder to do
When nothing is needed except me and you.

[ampoule]

This is absolutely the best. What a lucky woman. What a wonderful gift you have given her. At least I hope you will give her a copy of this.

[Dark Muse]

Mistletoe

First we met beneath the mistletoe,
I with Queen Maeve eyes
you lost within your winter storms.

It was the ancient rite,
you had the taste of cinnamon,
spiced mulled wine,
whilst I inhaled the scent
of pine.

The Yule log burns,
revelers held within its protective glow,
warmth spreads through the skin,
specters of futures gone
and futures yet to come
flit through the flames.

[YesNo]

This is absolutely the best. What a lucky woman. What a wonderful gift you have given her. At least I hope you will give her a copy of this.

Thanks, ampoule!

[_Joe_]

Seasons
'Twas the season of unenforced bedtimes,
Of baking smells and warm kitchens.
'Twas the season of cousins and uncles,
Of mounds of toys and the tree and lights.
'Twas the season of Santa and colors,
Of warm blankets and hot soup.
And carols.

'Tis the season of all-nighters and coffee,
Of empty dishes in the kitchen sink.
'Tis the season of long distance calls,
Of heaps of books and the terrible monitor.
'Tis the season of mall Santas and sales,
Of responsibility and microwave food.
And carols.

[cacian]

bump.
this needs to be uptodate. :)

[PeterL]

bump.
this needs to be uptodate. :)

Whatr image? Do you want to read about the pillow of pleasant thoughts?

[cacian]

Whatr image? Do you want to read about the pillow of pleasant thoughts?

image> what image?
the pillow of pleasant thoughts sounds rather voluminous haha.
would you like to elaborate? :)

[PeterL]

image> what image?
the pillow of pleasant thoughts sounds rather voluminous haha.
would you like to elaborate? :)

What subject then.
That was just something that popped into to my mind. That's what I lean my head against to try to go to sleep.

[cacian]

Ok let's kick start this contest

subject
butterfly feeling


we all experience it so why not engage in writing something about it :)

good luck.

[Melanie]

Well done YesNo, DarkMuse, and Joe for all the wonderful entries posted to the last subject.
I see a winner was never chosen but they didn't go unnoticed. I enjoyed each one :)

[YesNo]

In Spring the heart-throb butterfly
Makes lovers stop and look and sigh
When others are just passing by.
Fresh warmth enchants the air.

Though it may be a silly thing
When butterflies are fluttering
It’s better than cold Winter’s sting
When lovers pass through there.

[tailor STATELY]

oh, butterfly!

فراشة

oh, butterfly!
‎蝴蝶

flutter by
蝶

papillon
تیتلی

palpitation
бабочка

when you waft by
ผีเสื้อ

rama-rama
πεταλούδα

under my breath I sigh
эрвээхэй

mariposa
나비

marriage proposal?
پروانه

schmetterling!
glöyn byw

when you say no



3/11/2015

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

[cacian]

two very nice pieces
anymore offerings ?? :D

[_Joe_]

Stillborn Butterflies

Autumn sky and a chilly weather
With vortex leaves on the breeze;
Two sunbeams raining together
As I sit back in my chair at ease.

Stranger footsteps at the door;
Some unsolicited phone call;
The bubbling of wine as you pour;
Violin crescendo at the ball.

All these build-ups and omens!
My candle flutters then dies.
Life's pregnant little moments
Birth stillborn butterflies.

[_Joe_]

oh, butterfly!

فراشة

oh, butterfly!
‎蝴蝶

flutter by
蝶

papillon
تیتلی

palpitation
бабочка

when you waft by
ผีเสื้อ

rama-rama
πεταλούδα

under my breath I sigh
эрвээхэй

mariposa
나비

marriage proposal?
پروانه

schmetterling!
glöyn byw

when you say no



3/11/2015


Fantastic stuff! I love 'Oh butterfly/Flutter by'!

[prendrelemick]

Let your feelings fly, my love,
Don't keep them all cocooned,
End that gnawing phase
You hatched to,
Your time has come to change,
Burst out,
Shed your shell,
Fill your wings and fly
paint the sky with butterfly wings
Display!
Show me those butterfly feelings.

[jajdude]

Was just the other day I saw a butterfly
Stranded and sort of lonely
One wing was crippled
Into the flame he flew
And left beautiful ashes

[cacian]

well done to all of you
YesNo tailor STATELY a prendrelelmick and jajdude
three pieces charming and yet alarming love is calming haha :D

and the winner is
Joe!!
a beautifully rhymed piece :)

[tailor STATELY]

Congratulations _Joe_ ! ; and thank you for your kind comment on my entry.

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

[NikolaiI]

Oh my gosh! I'm glad I stopped by - those were all so great!

[virtuoso]

I have a new "topic" contest to propose. My topic is "Spring Fling". This topic can encompass romance in the animal kingdom (mating etc). It can include the Rites of Spring (bacchanalia or other festivals). It can include fertility in the Plant kingdom. It could include human romance. A combination of any two or three would be great!

[_Joe_]

and the winner is
Joe!!
a beautifully rhymed piece :)

Thank you, thank you :)


I have a new "topic" contest to propose. My topic is "Spring Fling". This topic can encompass romance in the animal kingdom (mating etc). It can include the Rites of Spring (bacchanalia or other festivals). It can include fertility in the Plant kingdom. It could include human romance. A combination of any two or three would be great!

Sounds like a great subject. I, however, had something else in mind that would change the current tone of this thread a little. Let's tackle one of the fundamental aspects of the human condition.

Beer! :D

Fire at will, people. I will choose a winner a week from now.

[virtuoso]

I think Spring Fling might be more apropos given the season. Maybe give the Spring theme a whirl, then let's do the summer beer gulp!

[_Joe_]

I think Spring Fling might be more apropos given the season.

I don't think people on the East Coast of the US (or the Southern Hemisphere for that matter) would quite agree, there.

[virtuoso]

A poem to start the "Spring Fling" contest! I agree that Joe's "beer" contest should be next. Let's cruise through the spring initiation, then move on to Joe's Beer, summer fest!



Spring Fling

Spring's fecund signs the canvas shades
coordinates spliced on petals, blades
mellow sun casts fawning eye
fertile streams from tissues sigh
mercurial colors bud in lustful lens
paramours buzz o'er pollen gins
pheromone scents waft in warm breeze
stag nostrils the ovulating vapors seize
damsel's lilac scent male libido chases
brawny limbs silky parameter traces

[_Joe_]

A poem to start the "Spring Fling" contest!

So you have simply decided that we are doing this topic even though this is not how this thread works and the only person who replied to your suggestion (me) did not agree. That was kinda rude, don't you think?

[virtuoso]

Remember, Cacian did not win the last contest. The precedent of the winner establishing the next topic was lost, and I did give my idea first. You did not come through with a new topic after you won her contest. All I am saying is let's do my proposed theme, then do your "beer" theme contest. I do not want to create any controversy. I think that you submitted an excellent poem to win the last contest. I had an idea of a Spring- related topic. I guess that the litnutters can go with it or not. I was not trying to rein in on your parade. I saw that nobody had proposed a new theme, so I jumped into the fray. I am sorry if it offended you.

[_Joe_]

Remember, Cacian did not win the last contest. The precedent of the winner establishing the next topic was lost, and I did give my idea first. You did not come through with a new topic after you won her contest.

Yes, Cacian bumped the thread but that was after 2 and a half months of inactivity. I have only been 9 hours late. Not quite the same. While I still agree that Spring is a "fecund" subject as you beautifully put it, I don't appreciate being co-opted this way.


I am sorry if it offended you.
Apology most definitely accepted. I realize it may sound like I overreacted but it felt to me like we were talking and you suddenly turned your back on me and decided to have your way regardless. I realize now that there has been a misunderstanding. Would you agree to let Cacian arbitrate by choosing one of our two topics for us?

[NikolaiI]

Oh, what?

virtuoso, respectfully, Joe's position makes a lot more sense.

When a game thread is abandoned by members for a long time, then someone comes and starts it with a new topic, that's totally logical - and, seeing as we are a little ways further. .

I mean I could go back and look for who was it that was the judge when it got abandoned, but that seems superfluous.

Hope you all are still friends :smile5:


not that I'm anything but another voice, albeit one with no stake, but unless I got it wrong it seems pretty simple...? so let's get on and play on beer?

[qimissung]

Nik and Joe are correct, Virtuoso. Your topic will have to wait until you win a round. Or you could start a Spring Fling thread, if you like.

[virtuoso]

Ok, if you really want to right poems on "Beer", then go ahead. I have written my poem on Spring. It is your choice. "Beer" seems like a superfluous topic. I do not see any poems yet. But enjoy your beer fling!

[virtuoso]

Yes, I would agree, if you want Cacian to choose that is fine. I think that the other Litnutters would prefer the "Beer" topic, so go with it!

[YesNo]

The growler’s empty. I will go
To Pete’s and have it filled again.
An ale or darker? I don’t know.
Jane smiles and pulls the tap as though
Her heart were also flowing in.

[Pompey Bum]

Wine to make hearts glad
Is what the Good Book says;
Alas! It also says to be not drunk on wine.
That's fine: my sins run well along another vine.
Though black as death, a stealthy draught of stout
Is just the thing to get the devil out.
No fear, then, when the vicar comes to call,
And indiscretions pale before his pomp;
A pint of beer will put him on his way
And leave a gladdened heart here for his pay.

[NikolaiI]

Pompey Bum, can we be friends again?

I never in a million years had any wrong intent towards you, and it has weighed on my heart very heavily so many days since then.

I apologize very sincerely for the misunderstanding we had, and with all my heart have only ever considered you a good friend; it is not easy for me to make friends, but this is not a reason to feel sorrow - for I have left sorrow behind many, many years ago; and it was simply my inability to express this to you, I feel, that caused our misunderstanding.

When I do make a friend, I tend to give my entire heart; that is why I said it is rare.

Please forgive me, again, my intentions towards you have only ever been positive.

Sincerely,
Nikolai.

[NikolaiI]

When all is seen clearly
It is seen to be
The heart's release
Into infinite peace.
Since this is the self-same source
Of every entity,
There is no reason to fear
No matter what year.

Beauty without understanding-
Life without fearlessness
Is like a hollow cask
Of beer.

Beer is useful,
As are all things under the sun,
But it can't compare
With the holy sacrament -
The healing of the nations.

I have tasted all things
And my spirit sings
For the beautiful, holy and true
That makes us forever new.


Beer can be healing -
if you know the feeling
of complete moderation -
if you can't set it down;
don't even fool around.
For it is only relaxation,
and meant for elevation...

For which peace and love,
Serve with a higher capacity.




Hi Virtuoso, I hope you will not mind that we wrote about beer.

In reality, it is not a good or a bad thing in itself, it mainly depends on how it is used. The same is true for most things - such as a hammer. Or a human life.

Two of my grandparents died of alcoholism, my father's father and my mother's mother (at 74 and 52). And the holy sacraments are made illegal. So you can understand I feel strongly about this, and how clear it has done harm to our society. When substances that are sacred and healing - and clearly known as thus the whole world round.

Needless to say - accurate information is primary and key. My father never drank while I was growing up, and I got a good example - and he told me of the truth of everything he'd done; and he told me the truth of alcohol, explaining as clearly as possible what it was - not an absolute good, nor evil, but with a clear description of what it actually is - as well as the encouragement to be quite careful, as alcoholism is something that is genetically passed - it runs in the family. In other words, if you have parents and grandparents who were, then you have a slightly higher predisposition - biologically speaking.

However, having such clear information about it has been good. Throughout my life I have only rarely done so - further knowing that one or two beers does not do much harm, but three and further begins to. I only ever drank too much once or twice - and all in all, it has been my inclination to be happy just with the pure air, just with the love of family and animals, but one has to come to this development naturally.

I'm writing all this to hlep share my story because almost all my friends, over-used these things. . . and so, despite the fact that everyone in this nation has heard, that moderation is important, is key - still, without a better example, they.

All of my dearest and best friends found their way -and they are all doing well to this day. However, I cannot feel that they wouldn't have found their balance and true understanding much sooner if they had had a better example.

There is another thing, dear friend - in places where beer is not allowed, generally you also hav bans on things like singing, dancing, or kissing in the street, and as these are some of the most beautiful things, to make them illegal is surely a great shame.


The problem when you start to ban or outlaw natural things, or things which have been part of human existence for such a long time - then you tend to create bad conscience. And beer for example, when used in a good way, actually is a good thing, and part of the natural development of a human. It would ideally be best if we didn't get into it until we're 25 perhaps, because that is when the brain finishes fully developing (same with TV); but this ideal in the same sense that it would be ideal if we didn't have war.

If you don't know how it can be healing (despite as we both know, the pitfalls of over-use), one example should probably suffice. Sometimes when there is an injury - there can develop a feedback loop of tension and pain in the body. . . for instance the shoulder. The body can't relax, and so it doesn't quite heal - and it may go on for days like this, even if one tries resting, stretching, the correct movements, relaxation - all of the typical healing activities. And yet none can quite reach the full effect needed - however, 2 or 3 glasses of wine in a case like this can heal it, because they allow the body to fully relax, and the inflamed tissue or muscles can get repaired over night.

This is how, in a real sense, everything can be used for good or ill - and in the same way a healer can give you the right medicine for the right cure.

This whole area is also one that I have, for my whole life, extremely strongly believed in the notion of thinking for oneself - and it has never let me down. Schopenhauer, and McKenna, as well as every philosopher worth his salt, emphasized this, along with 3 or 4 other main points, as the primary keys to getting along in life - and for medicine, I have found this to be more true, or more valuable, than almost anything else. . . I definitely encourage it.


For instance when you have multi-billion dollar corporations making a profit off of people, the trend we have seen is that the people's best interests do not come first - and in balance of profit versus altrusim, when the business model weighs profit so highly, another form of harm comes about. So - I would simply say, consult your conscience adn innate feel - as well as ancient wisdom.


In the same way that a cat's love is almost always more healing than a pill, and there is almost nothing (not quite nothing, but infinitely far less than modern society knows) in the human mind that can't be cured with fresh air, sunshine, and peaceful time spent in nature, a good and true understanding of beer can be a useful part of developing into a fully actualized self. Once we come back to full peace, of course, nothing is needed really except a chance to be ourselves, and an area of nature we can walk around in (probably the only time that "the bigger the better" is a truism).

However, many lives go into the making of each bottle, so it would be smart and kind to honor them and their sacrifice, by acting in an honorable way.

In our own tradition, we have two wise thoughts which incorporate some wisdom with modern day -

"The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom." - William Blake,

"All of life is an experiment, the more we make the better." - Emerson

It is not that these two did not one day reach that lovely place, where happiness is dependent on nothing but life and love, but I would say that they do not get there by following a narrow path.

As one of my friends, a (poker) writer, and the most brilliant, in many ways, perhaps, explained - good government does what the people tell it to do, bad government tries to tell the people what to do (acts like a parent). Government should be from the people, and represent them - and in many ways, we have inalienable rights in this country, and these are upheld to a large extent; but as we have seen, a lot of harm can come when our own consciousness is considered to be forbidden territory.

All we can do is share our stories - as Jung believed, all the ill in the world comes because people's stories do not get told. Of course - this is a bit of a fledgling in terms of wisdom - but it is wisdom nonetheless.


Bad conscience is the one thing, under all circumstances, to be avoided.

Much peace and friendship to you, virtuoso - much of this is written in the hopes of understanding, peace, and friendship.

[NikolaiI]

Oh I missed the time deadline on that last edit (if you edit within a couple minutes, the little 'edited' blurb will not show up!).

I almost invariably drink a glass of water when I wake up, and I think I would have made it had I had it this morning (truly, about 99% of the time I do, hehe). . I just wanted to write on this before I forgot it.

Incidentally, if one does drink beer (or any other) it's so useful to drink water afterwords or during - as these dehydrate you, and this is why one experiences hangovers... drinking 2 glasses of water after is quite useful... Cheers :smile5:

I know, I know, too much information, right?

Peace :)

(Since I know you care about health so much, I thought it worth mentioning. There is actually a doctor who has theorized that virtually all maladies are generally caused by not hydrating enough.)

[_Joe_]

That was heavy. And here I thought to lighten the mood of this thread a little... Thank you for sharing.

[NikolaiI]

Ah, that was my intent too.

Life can be so joyful, and we really can have peace. I feel it is so, so near.

No problem. . I have really always felt that if people really understood each other, they wouldn't be at odds so much.

Best I can do is make vows for peace, love and good health every day and do my best to uphold them. .

I thought a personal story might help to clarify our (Westerners) relationship with beer, or at least how it can be.

Peace :)

[tailor STATELY]

The Root of Beer


safrole stilled, sassafras embraces
sarsaparilla in all its humour
and perspicacity; then, when
married with essences of various
spices, berries, leaves, saps, barks, and
roots produces a sweet brew; tempting both
tipplers and teetotaled alike

3/27/2015

In my younger days I tippled Elephant, Fosters, Dos Equis, and Heinekin; gradually going from light to darker finished brews. When exiled to the greater Chico, CA area I tried Corona, and Coronas w/lime and found both presentations horrid. Luckily Sierra Nevada brewery was becoming in vogue and I spent many happy times sampling their wares sharing pitchers with friends. For the past 11-years I've forgone alcohol completely, with no regrets, and search for the perfect Root Beer (non-alcoholic versions of course)... each recipe unique unto its own.

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

[_Joe_]

Thank you for your entries everyone.
I enjoyed them all; but I have to go with Pompey Bum's "The Vicar's Pint". I really enjoyed both the rhyme and the reason, there.

[tailor STATELY]

Congrats Pompey Bum !

[Pompey Bum]

Thank you so much! You are too kind, _Joe_, but I am quite honored. :-D

For the next subject, let's go with spring. Virtuoso can resubmit his excellent poem or write a new one. Anyone know how the deadline works?

[_Joe_]

Thank you so much! You are too kind, _Joe_, but I am quite honored. :-D

For the next subject, let's go with spring. Mal4 can resubmit his excellent poem or write a new one. Anyone know how the deadline works?

I think you are free to set the deadline as you see fit.

[Pompey Bum]

Damn, I meant Virtuoso can repost his spring poem if he wants. Total senility. Sorry V.

Anyway, people can post their poems and I'll do a going, going, gone sometime next week.

[Pompey Bum]

Well, Virtuoso seems to have taken a powder, at least for the moment. In his absence, and unless he says otherwise, I will resubmit his poem for the next subject contest, and call for any others. The subject is spring, the season not the mattress component. All are welcome in the light!




Spring Fling

Spring's fecund signs the canvas shades
coordinates spliced on petals, blades
mellow sun casts fawning eye
fertile streams from tissues sigh
mercurial colors bud in lustful lens
paramours buzz o'er pollen gins
pheromone scents waft in warm breeze
stag nostrils the ovulating vapors seize
damsel's lilac scent male libido chases
brawny limbs silky parameter traces

[axolotl]

Green spring ring

[tailor STATELY]

(lol)
The subject is spring, the season not the mattress component... oh, rats!

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

[NikolaiI]

a poem of a friend.

[tailor STATELY]

Spring Has Sprung

Spring has sprung like an old pocket watch whose

works have spilt upon a hardwood floor: Jewels

scurry in a twinkling; there! and there! Gears and

pinions of intricate complexity ( no ébauche utilized

here! ) dance like dreidels for a moment - only to es-

cape from sight; the escape-wheel curiously not so

4/3/2015

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

[Pompey Bum]

This is going very well, so let's set the deadline for Friday, April 10th. In the meantime, keep 'em coming!

[YesNo]

It’s chilly in the morning. Welcome Spring
When April’s fresh-made flowers hint that soon
The trees will bud, but first a wondrous thing:
The shadow of our Earth will chill our Moon.

[colb2]

CHILDREN OF GOD

Exquisite feathers,
Together they soar,
Hovering the world,
Migrating in accord,
Seasons change,
Chase the light,
Spring is here,
Faith be north!!

[cacian]

springs
brings
tidings
of many things
warmth
and flowers
the rain powers
the breeze
and the trees
the wind
freeze
and everything is
in border
with a natural afforder
for a summer
to order

[Pompey Bum]

Double post. :)

[Pompey Bum]

Okay, it's award day! :) Despite some ill-advised backstage skulduggery, the entries ended up being really outstanding. Thanks to everyone who contributed.

Colb, I'm a sucker for internal rhyme, so I loved the way you used "feather" with "together," as well as the subtler slant rhymes given by "soar," "accord," and "north." My only advice would be to try to work in a higher vowel sound into a secondary rhyme ("ee" or "ay" or maybe "ing") as a kind of counter-point to the more somber "oh" sound that you use. It would give this really exultant poem a joyful sound to balance the seriousness that the sounds you use already bring to it. (Think of it as male and female voices, if that helps). But nice work. Really well done.

And Cacian, you do exactly what I'm advising Colb to do in your less subtle but very enthusiastic piece: using the lower "masculine" tones from "warmth" and "border;" but playing them against the higher "feminine" sounds from "breeze,"brings," tidings, etc. I also love it that your minimalism never sounds pompous. It's not:

Me
My life
Agony
All about
Me me me

Instead, your poem is like a basket of flowers, some brightly hued, some deeply colored. My only advice would be arrange these beautiful flowers a little more. Try using a somewhat alternating rhyme scheme rather than putting the same kind together in bunches. Variety is the spice of life, and your poetry is nothing if not spicy! :)

And Tailor, yours is a truly intricate work, like the metaphorical timepiece you describe. I loved the way you used words like "twinkling" and "intricate complexity" to suggest the sound of the gears and springs spilling onto the hardwood floor. This was, in fact, a very professional sounding poem. My only advice would be to develop the metaphor you have made into more of a theme. What happens in the fall? Do we find the fallen pieces of the watch brightly colored--but with rust? Does the inevitable fall of seasons and even youth give the springtime fall of the watch a tragic quality? Or is it merely a whimsical one? My advice would be to give this outstanding poem at least one more stanza. I'm sure you would do it proud.

And that means that the winner is...YesNo for his disarmingly effective Eclipsing the Moon in April. I hope I wasn't biased by the fact that I look on YesNo as a poetic mentor--his poetry being so much better than mine, and mine having improved so much in the brief time I have known him. His poem is a perfect example of what I was trying to express before. The ABAB rhyme scheme alternates higher and lower tones; the unrushed iambic pentameter draws the reader on in a conversationally paced but subtly musical way; as does the unforced alliteration of "fresh-made flowers." I love also that this piece was written not just about the early spring but also the eclipse that came with it: an event that brought a curious wonder to the change of seasons. That feeling of gentle curiosity was what I took from this wondrous little poem. Thanks YesNo, who will determine the next subject.

[tailor STATELY]

Congratulations YesNo !; and thank you Pompey Bum for your kind words. I will ponder your suggestion.

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

[YesNo]

Thank you, Pompey Bum! Your description of masculine and feminine sounds makes sense. I also admire your poetry as well as the way you put together this critique. Since "sound" is now on my mind, that will be the theme for the next contest.

Subject: Sound
Deadline: About two weeks from now.

[Pompey Bum]

A glow came yellow and a trilling gold:
A sweetness sifting through the branches black;
I asked you did you hear--a silence fell
As gently as the light swelled on that place.
You told me there were things you'd never hear:
Songs taken with the damage and things done,
That flew away in silent feathered flight,
And whether dawn came, so came night.
I listened on in sorrow and afraid:
For you, for me, for where the garden lay.
I tried to hear it for you but I failed,
As soft light hardened into clearer day.

[Lykren]

Nice poem Pompey!

[Pompey Bum]

Thank you, Lykren. That means a lot to me.

[tailor STATELY]

The Sound

tires turn, churn, crunch upon sandy asphalt
into a moderately populated parking lot: stop

doors spring open/close after hats and cameras
retrieved: three pad-pad-pad down the path
to the pedestrian bridge where step/clung-
step/clung becomes the song of a throng of
nature-loving devotees walking suspended
over railroad tracks to ultimately reach the
sandy flats and lap-lapped shore where geo-
ducks murmur hidden below knowing they're
within reach of giggling youth whose eager hands
scoop the raspy gravel in a race to obtain them

gulls cry and laugh as singles and pairs splish
through the shallow waters of Carkeek seeking
tidal treasures that may be discovered (but not
lightly taken, nor kept); ankle deep, knee deep,
waist deep - the cool water becomes a living or-
ganism: pulsing; a welcoming caress to one's spirit

a monstrous centipede, a train, wails in the distance
growing larger and larger, its wailing becoming bolder; the
rumble of wheel-works rolling on the tracks is heard; then
shortly passes away - the train dopplering out of view

out of the water, a walk through the brush - then a
wade through a canopied stream that whispers sweet
nothings as one proceeds knee deep in a solemn slog
down this withywindle to another footpath; leaving
behind a treasured shell; then trundle back into the car -
leaving the Sound behind: the memories of this day,
and the many happy days of youth past, vividly clear

4/18/2015

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

[North Star]

'dopplering' is a nice touch, Tailor.



The Sound

The sound of heart, beating
The rushing blood, streaming
The scratching needle, dropping

Silently in the agonizing
Body, in the veins flowing
Soothing pain, and killing
All sensation, and being.

Muscles relenting,
Body dropping
In silence.

[YesNo]

Very nice entries! The deadline is now April 25th, next Saturday. There is still time to enter!

[cacian]

Pompey Bum thank you very much for the detailed feedback.
some very interesting ideas.
i never thought of masculine feminine in this way.

sound
a particle of light
is without
a doubt
hollow
so to resonate
follow
and to hear
is near
precise
to the ear
so we can
be here

nature
detects
geographic
connects
it is
perfect
to
experts

[YesNo]

Time is up! Thank you for all the entries!

Pompey Bum: This is a very nice poem. The eighth line seemed to be missing a foot but it was not very noticeable and may have been on purpose. I liked the acknowledgement that there are some sounds that could not be heard, nor could one hear them for the other. I could sense the anxiety on that bridal morning and what one heard and the other didn't hear reflected that anxiety.

tailor STATELY: I seached for Carkeek which appears to be a park near Seattle. That was a nice description of the nature devotees. I particularly liked the idea of "tidal treasures that may be discovered (but not/lightly taken, nor kept)". One usually thinks taking and keeping treasures is easier than finding them.

North Star: It sounds like a pain killing or life-taking drug was administered and for the person receiving this the sounds dominated until the end. I liked how this started with various sounds and ended with the word "silence".

cacian: I enjoyed the first stanza in particular giving me the idea that sound allows us to "be here", an unexpected line. I also liked the unexpected idea about light being "hollow".

I think these all deserve to win. They aren't easy to get out of my mind.

What I am picking is the person to continue the contest, the winner among all the winners.

The winner is cacian.

[Pompey Bum]

Felicitations, Cacian! :)

[cacian]

YesNo thank you very much for the feedback.
and Pompey thank you so much :)

and the next topic is:

telephone

[YesNo]

The apps that smarten up my phone
Might prove that I am not alone.
My wife knows everywhere I go
And checks in case. You never know.
The yoga class I’ve scheduled there
And photos of stuff everywhere
Are organized though I am not
Aware of all that I have got.
That star? I’ll check. It’s Venus. See?
A text comes in. I let it be.
Occasionally people call,
But hardly anyone at all.

[cacian]

anyone wishes to enter the contest?

[Pompey Bum]

Yes, cacian, but I am still working on mine. When is the deadline?

[cacian]

Yes, cacian, but I am still working on mine. When is the deadline?

two weeks and thank you for replying :)

[tailor STATELY]

Still marrying thoughts and words... thank you for the deadline (And belated congratulations ! :) )

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

[cacian]

Still marrying thoughts and words... thank you for the deadline (And belated congratulations ! :) )

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

tailor thank you and no problems :)

[PeterL]

anyone wishes to enter the contest?

I'll call back in a few days.

[cacian]

I'll call back in a few days.

hi Peter look forward to that :)

[Pompey Bum]

Peter and tailor (and Cacian), try the Form Poetry contest, too! A new one just started today. :)

[cacian]

Peter and tailor (and Cacian), try the Form Poetry contest, too! A new one just started today. :)

Pompey thanks for letting us know will do :)

[PeterL]

Amazing! talking with one not present.
Mobile or fixed the connections can be.
Ethereal crackles or buzzes are not as
Common as they were in times well passed.
Hell yes! Now they drop the call completely
Elegant in concept; poor in execution.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Ameche
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9WDyKO7GQ70

[_Joe_]

Amid my scattered thoughts
And cold rationality
A yearning is
Killing me ... filling me.

What does it all mean?
What am I doing?
My loneliness is
Killing me ... filling me.

The inner child in me
Craves security.
This dread is
Killing me ... filling me.

My fears incessantly ring
So I pick up the telephone.
There is nothing but dial tone.

[cacian]

these are nice entries keep them coming :)

[Pompey Bum]

Cacian, don't wait for me, okay? Mine ended up being too personal for me to feel comfortable about posting. Good luck to everyone else! :)

[Melanie]

iPhone Learning Curve

You know, it might be easier
to learn the saxophone,
the sousaphone and xylophone
than iClouds and iPhones

Now, francophones and anglophones
i can learn to understand
but it might take a megaphone
to get iPhones 'round my head

[cacian]

and the results are as follow

YesNo

My wife knows everywhere I go
And checks in case. You never know.

a fun piece i especially enjoyed the above two lines haha :D

PeterL

a very well rhymed piece enjoyable and light
i especially enjoyed the last two lines

Hell yes! Now they drop the call completely
Elegant in concept; poor in execution.

they made me laugh in a nice way ;)


Joe

a clever title
an earnest honest piece anxious in places
but i liked the last stanza

My fears incessantly ring
So I pick up the telephone.
There is nothing but dial tone.

it made for a nice closure to the piece

Melanie

and what a piece full of sound
a real buzz feel to it
humour as well as rhyme throughout
my favourite lines:

but it might take a megaphone
to get iPhones 'round my head

and the winner is
PeterL
congratulations !!!

[PeterL]

and the results are as follow


PeterL

a very well rhymed piece enjoyable and light
i especially enjoyed the last two lines

Hell yes! Now they drop the call completely
Elegant in concept; poor in execution.

they made me laugh in a nice way ;)

and the winner is
PeterL
congratulations !!!

I am honored and flattered beyond expression.

I will need a little while to think of a subject, but I will post that before the Sun sinks into the Pacific Ocean, as seen from Half Moon Bay.

[PeterL]

The next subject will be differentiating subjectivity and objectivity. That’s a good neo-classical subject, and I think it lends itself to plenty of metaphors. You didn’t even have to wait for sunset over Half Moon Bay.

It appears that the normal length of a contest is two weeks, so let that be, and the deadline for the contest will be May 27 at Noon.

[cacian]

hi Peter and you are very welcome i really enjoyed reading your piece it was perfect :)

i am not clear however on what the subject is
are you able to explain further or demonstrate in a line or two?
that would be very helpful :)

[PeterL]

To further explain:

subjective
adjective
1. existing in the mind; belonging to the thinking subject rather than to the object of thought (opposed to objective ).


objective
adjective
5. not influenced by personal feelings, interpretations, or prejudice; based on facts; unbiased:
an objective opinion.
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/objective?s=ts

Facts are objective, while opinions are subjective. There are valid reasons for thinking that there is no difference between objective and subjective. Something is objective, if it is outside the person and personal opinion.

What I think is one thing, but I know other
Things. I think I feel joy, but joy is my own
Unshared, quite unknown by any other.
Emotions are felt, while facts are known.

I could go on about the memory of pleasure, but that's a little more.