lucybonett
08-06-2008, 03:25 PM
Hello, mates! i'm new at this forum, and i just wanted to share with you this short story i've written. hope you like it. It actually doesn't have a title (yet), but i usually call it The locked door. If you can help me by suggesting a better title, please do it, thank you and...here it goes.
'Forget about it', John had said, 'forget about it Susan'. But she could't. She just couldn't. She wasn't able to understand why he had left. Almost a week had passed. Susan was now alone, as always since John had gone. She was walking in the street, going to the house, her house. But she couldn't call it home since he wasn't there anymore, waiting for her to come back from work. It was cold. She was trembling, but it didn't matter, neither to her nor to anyone.
Once at 'home' Susan undressed and went to sleep. She wasn't hungry, she wasn’t tired either, she just felt lonely, very lonely and sad. She wished she could forget…Some minutes and she was asleep. She dreamed. And in her dream there was a very long, white corridor and at the end of it: a door, a locked black door. She tried to walk towards it, but as she walked forward, it seemed that she wasn’t moving at all, and that frustrated her until she felt totally desperate.
Susan was now, once again awake, breathing heavily. She sat on her bed and looked at the clock, it was half past nine in the morning. It was Saturday and she didn’t have to go to work. We went towards the bathroom, but she could not enter it. The door was locked. She went to find the key. She didn’t remember locking that door. She was now opening it. She could hardly believe what she saw. John! He was there, lying on the floor, with a lot of blood arround him and a knife in his chest. Suddenly, she started to remember everything. Now she had to hide the body, bury it.
Yes, she had done it.
That was it, i'll wait for your comments, thanks for reading.
Lucy
'Forget about it', John had said, 'forget about it Susan'. But she could't. She just couldn't. She wasn't able to understand why he had left. Almost a week had passed. Susan was now alone, as always since John had gone. She was walking in the street, going to the house, her house. But she couldn't call it home since he wasn't there anymore, waiting for her to come back from work. It was cold. She was trembling, but it didn't matter, neither to her nor to anyone.
Once at 'home' Susan undressed and went to sleep. She wasn't hungry, she wasn’t tired either, she just felt lonely, very lonely and sad. She wished she could forget…Some minutes and she was asleep. She dreamed. And in her dream there was a very long, white corridor and at the end of it: a door, a locked black door. She tried to walk towards it, but as she walked forward, it seemed that she wasn’t moving at all, and that frustrated her until she felt totally desperate.
Susan was now, once again awake, breathing heavily. She sat on her bed and looked at the clock, it was half past nine in the morning. It was Saturday and she didn’t have to go to work. We went towards the bathroom, but she could not enter it. The door was locked. She went to find the key. She didn’t remember locking that door. She was now opening it. She could hardly believe what she saw. John! He was there, lying on the floor, with a lot of blood arround him and a knife in his chest. Suddenly, she started to remember everything. Now she had to hide the body, bury it.
Yes, she had done it.
That was it, i'll wait for your comments, thanks for reading.
Lucy