dancing on the wind of a question

[lucidnightmares]

why does the leaf fall so elengently?
so gracefully into deaths cold embrace
or is it one of warmth? guess i wouldn`t know
when will that final leaf fall upon my face?

or perhaps it`s a seed
can one simple object create a world
our hearts may be small and fragile
yet they unleash euphoric beauty when unfurled

the trees seem to reach for something
something allways out of reach, how familiar a notion
hundreds of years these giants have witnessed
yet some never touched the ocean

why have desires if not for creation?
hands reach for the heavens
and so we captured flight
when we have no desires, what then?

does all knowledge dive into oblivions grasp
lost in the darkness, like a scared child?
or do they float by, dancing on the winds of a question?
finding the lost in thought, confused and beguiled.

[Dark Muse]

This is beatiful, such graceful imagery, and you inccoprated the questions in your poem every well so that it did not distrub the flow.

[InspireMe]

utilizing objects of nature as a constant to express the mysteries of the earth was very effective. bravo, i really like it! i especially love the questions. it motivates the readers to think....

[PrinceMyshkin]

The last line - with its forced, limp rhyme - is something of a betrayal of the lovely freedom of the rest of this.

[lucidnightmares]

thank you all very much
i really appreciate it

the thing that kinda made me stop in my tracks was your comment PrinceMyshkin, it`s exactly what happened, i guess sometimes when a thought ends it`s best to let it go for awhile until it flows back to you, not force it out of yourself. this is a small epiphany for myself, thanks:thumbs_up

[PrinceMyshkin]

thank you all very much
i really appreciate it

the thing that kinda made me stop in my tracks was your comment PrinceMyshkin, it`s exactly what happened, i guess sometimes when a thought ends it`s best to let it go for awhile until it flows back to you, not force it out of yourself. this is a small epiphany for myself, thanks:thumbs_up

May I say that whether I'm right or wrong in my observation re that line, I appreciate your openness to receiving other points of view. Some of us think of our poems as if they were our children, about whom the slightest seemingly negative remark does not so much hurt them as that part of our ego that we've invested in them.

[Pendragon]

Yeah, that last line doesn't fit an otherwise awesome poem! Would you consider changing it? :thumbs_up

[goldenrod]

I am sure the last line's deficiencies will be resolved...

"What use a hand to grasp with, if it reach not for the sky?"


goldenrod.

[PrinceMyshkin]

I am sure the last line's deficiencies will be resolved...

"What use a hand to grasp with, if it reach not for the sky?"


goldenrod.

Surely a misquote from Robert Browning which should (please God!) read

A man's reach should exceed his grasp
Or what's a heaven for?

which my grade 9 geometry teacher would declaim to us every now and then, reaching one hand high above his head, the effect being somewhat undercut by the absence of a thumb on that hand!

[lucidnightmares]

consider the changes made
maybe no the best
but in my oppinions flaws are needed to observe true beauty anyway`s:p

i`m alittle jealous of you PrinceMyshkin, iv`e allways wanted a teacher like that, thumb or not:D

[goldenrod]

The lineI quoted was from a poem I wrote. The line before ending with "said, in another guise" and the following line " What use a hand to grasp with, if it reach not for the skies?

Which referred to your Browning quote "Prince" so, it really was not a misquote...

Perhaps I should have quoted both lines in full, as you had no way of knowing the reference,and would, therefore, pick it up as a misquote!

goldenrod.

[qimissung]

I don't know-I think the last line is O.K.-but then I kind of write that way. It is, to my understanding, parallelism, which is a literary device. Is this line asking 'does all knowledge ...find(ing) the lost inn thought, confused, beguiled. Is that what it is saying?That's how I read it, anyway, and I like the idea of knowledge finding us when we need it.

I like your poem, excellent use of imagery, especially the one about hearts...'unleash euphoric beauty when unfurled,' and the one you used in your title: 'dancing on the wind of a question.' Beautiful.