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View Full Version : can your beauty be painted?



ahsiam
04-01-2008, 05:54 AM
my vision on you cast an image on the world
your beauty falls, it breaks but never dies.


how silent can this silence be?
if its not death nor your mood
how high can your beauty rise?
when i dream about you
and you dance, beautifully stepped...


and your silent breathing life
in a tranquil land!
where a shadow of lasting ease is made.


an illusion of world can be made
where souls of truth prevail
but this peace should not be betrayed.


the world is a canvas
and i have a brush
but can your beauty be painted?

symphony
04-01-2008, 06:06 AM
I still cant related the last stanza with the rest. And i still think its an awesome poem.
(Oh and i'm not sure what the title of this is, "nature" or "can your beauty..."? if its the latter, do u really need the "nature" caption?)

ahsiam
04-01-2008, 06:12 AM
no actually. i just wanted people to know its about nature. and the last stanza is sort of a conclusion...its like nature is so beautiful that its not possible for you to capture it in the canvas........
:D you liked it :D

symphony
04-01-2008, 06:18 AM
hmmm i got what u meant, but couldnt link it to the other feelings in the above verses. anyway its all good as it is.
and hey i think poetries should give readers the liberty to make anything out of it, dont give hints :p i'm still finding myself frowning at that caption. :lol:

ahsiam
04-01-2008, 06:53 AM
ok then i should delete it. after all jani dost bolese...:D