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Swallow
11-10-2004, 06:38 AM
These swans on my lifelong river of years
are swimming around between laughter and tears
White swans of beauty on a river so blue
They have their grace and they look like you

Beautiful swans you will meet later on
and you will find out that your beauty has gone
Feathers are falling as the time passes by
They are blowing along with the riders in the sky

The heart of a swan is the heart of a bird
but the heartbeat will never ever be heard
That's because birds fly so high in the sky
while you stay on ground and you wish you could fly

White wings of power one morning in May
are flying these swans back during the day
Back to a place where the evening keeps the sun
alive and still shining 'cause the night is on the run

Swans against the sun in a silhuette of art
are slowly reflecting that lovers are apart
White swans of beauty on a river so blue
They have their grace and they look like you

amuse
11-10-2004, 01:44 PM
White swans of beauty on a river so blue
They have their grace and they look like you

a very heart-catching ending
*oops included too many lines

Helga
11-10-2004, 03:50 PM
very moving, I really like it!!

Jester
11-10-2004, 05:33 PM
I like the rhyming its almost as if it came naturally (i hate trying to find words to rhyme if im doing a rhyming poem)
Its so beautiful like the beauty its describing (sappy but true)

Jay
11-11-2004, 08:09 PM
Last stanza's definitelly my fave. I like the way there are the swans 'everywhere', connecting the events into a whole.