Book Idea : I need feedback

[maga366]

http://www.online-literature.com/forums/showthread.php?p=542119#post542119

New idea. Link for the the new idea is above.

[mayneverhave]

Willem Defoe?

[maga366]

Willem Defoe?

no.. William Dafoe. What do you mean by this?
What i mean is, like why are you questioning the name? lol

Edit. aww damn it. I searched william dafoe on google to see if any one has used this name already, and frig. The guy who plays the
goblin in spiderman is named that! Frig that sucks, i thought i made it up lol.. subconsiously i knew that name.

Oh well.. I'll still use it becuase i dont plan on getting it published.

[pbmn]

Your plot is interesting, but is there any way that you could make this story/book more unique? This topic has been done countless times, and The Spiderwick Chronicles even includes a similar book to the one you are talking of in your story. Change it up a little, get rid of the book and make it your own. Other than that, it does sound a little bit interesting.

[maga366]

Your plot is interesting, but is there any way that you could make this story/book more unique? This topic has been done countless times, and The Spiderwick Chronicles even includes a similar book to the one you are talking of in your story. Change it up a little, get rid of the book and make it your own. Other than that, it does sound a little bit interesting.

ya im loosely basing it on the spiderwick chronicles. I took that idea and made it for a more mature audience. Im rethinking somethings though.
I might remove the book liek you suggested, and i dunno.. need to think about it more.

The name is being changed to Kale sumthing.
Death of a friend
He gets a phone call one day from his friend’s parents.
The girl he protects when he’s getting beaten....
The gang was put into juvie for beating him up...
When they were released, they beat the girl to death
And he gets a call from the parents saying she’s dead.


Death of his father
*find this out later*
The father was the keeper of the book, passed down from generation to generation.
The father is protecting it from the cult that attacked the town.
The cult found out who had the book and went after his family.
The father ran to the house in the town that they move to and hid the book there.
He went back to his house and the cult followed him. They attacked him and the mother and baby Kale. He dies protecting them.

*Kale was told he died in a car accident*


Love Interest with Kelli

Kale develops a love interest with Kelli over the course of the story.